Charming--The Broken Kingdom
by LauraGarthwait
Summary: 18 Year Old Tara Knowles leaves her life behind in Chicago. She makes her way to Charming, California looking for a miracle, for a fairy-tale.
1. Chapter 1

It's not an easy decision to walk away from the only life you've ever known and away from the only man you've ever loved.

"Damnit!" Tara Knowles screamed in frustration as the lid came off of the ice water and poured down her shirt-the shirt she had picked out specifically for this interview she was now almost late for.

She pulled her suitcase out of her back seat and started looking for a shirt to replace the one the idiot at the drive thru just caused her to get soaked by not putting the lid on the cup all of the way. She pulled out a black Metallica t-shirt. It wasn't something she normally would have worn to an interview but it was probably the only thing in the whole bag that was clean.

She had left her in quite a hurry so none of her "good clothes" had been washed yet. It took all of the money she had been able to save back to make the drive from Chicago to Charming. She was starting to rethink her decision since she just spent her last fifty cents to buy this damn ice water that was now all over her shirt instead of quenching her thirst. She didn't even have money to rent a motel. She had been sleeping in her car for two days. She would have had a lot more money if her stupid-crazy-ex wouldn't have messed with their bank account so she couldn't access the money, her own money.

She pulled up in the parking lot and took a deep breath. She needed this job so she could not screw this up under any circumstances. She had already interviewed at the only other businesses in town who all said they'd let her know. She was getting the distinct impression that this town didn't particularly care to much for newcomers.

She climbed out of her car and looked around nervously. This was so far off from her typical work environment but it was the only thing left here to try to get and she really didn't want to find another town quite so soon. Not that she had the money to leave again anyways until she started working and she really liked the name of this one. "Charming." Almost as if it was out of a fairy tale. The sight in front of her now was far from the storybooks she read as a child. There were bikers and half-dressed women everywhere. It would definitely explain why they picked 7pm for an interview time, Tara had originally thought that was a joke but clearly it was not.

"Can I help you?" She was greeted by a woman in tight-fitting clothes who looked like she could see straight through her.

"I'm looking for Gemma Teller-Morrow?" Tara asked, nervously.

"...and who are you?"

"My name is Tara Knowles. I'm here for the interview at 7:00."

"It's 7:05. Follow me." Gemma led her into the office. "Have a seat."

Tara sat down.

"You're not from around here are you?"

"No-No ma'am." Tara stammered. She could feel the sweat beading up on her forehead.

"What brought you to Charming?" Gemma looked at her pointedly-studying her.

"Well I wanted a fresh start." Tara replied simply, hoping to move past this particular subject quickly.

"Where are you from?"

"Illinois"

"So what brings you half way across the country?" Gemma questioned.

Tara sighed. "As I said, a fresh start."

"Well I don't think this is going to work out, Tara. You see, this here is a family business and whatever you're hiding will no doubt bring unnecessary drama and we don't need any more of that than we already have so it was nice meeting you." Gemma stood and opened the door for Tara to leave.

Tara nodded the tears were streaming down her face. She got up and left the office and hurried off to her car.

No job equaled no money which equaled more time living in her car. She contemplated calling him and asking him to come pick her up since this was not going as she hoped it would, but that wasn't a solution either. He would beat her, maybe worse. She had promised herself that she would not live through that again so she dried her eyes, held her head high, and decided to keep trying tomorrow. Tomorrow was a new day after-all.

She was tired and hungry so she pulled back into the parking spot at the end of the parking lot of the town's grocery store to sleep. The store closed at 8 so by this time most of the people were already gone.

She was almost asleep when she heard a knock at her window. Gemma. She sighed and rolled her window down.

"What are you doing? It's not safe to sleep in your car. Anyone could just come up and mug you." Gemma narrowed her eyes at her.

"Sorry. Yeah, you're right I was just too tired to drive." Tara answered.

She noticed Gemma scoping out her car which was full of her suit-cases and boxes from the rapid move.

"You got somewhere to stay, sweetheart?" Gemma questioned as if she already knew the answer.

"Oh Yeah. I'm fine. Don't worry about me."

Gemma nodded but the look in her eyes told Tara she wasn't convinced. "Where you staying?"

"At the motel across town." Tara answered with a half-hearted smile.

"The one here in town?" Gemma questioned again.

Tara fought the urge to roll her eyes. Of course the one here in town. Where else. She just nodded again.

"Uh huh. How about you stop lying and start telling me what's really going on? There's not a motel in Charming."

Tara closed her eyes and took a breath. She could feel the tears building up again but she held them at bay.

"Okay. You're right. I'm living in my car. I have no job which means I have no money for housing or food. My car is almost out of gas so I just decided to park it here and figure it all out tomorrow." Tara confessed-too tired to keep up the charade any longer.

Gemma thought for a long moment, she never took her eyes off Tara's. "Follow me." Gemma ordered.

"Where are we going?" She asked.

"Back to my place. You can sleep there until you get back on your feet." Gemma answered. "Just so we're clear, I am going to want an explanation. If you decide to take me up on my offer to give you a warm bed, food, and plumbing then you are going to tell me why I'm doing it. No secrets. If you don't want to do that then you can stay here and sleep in your car. If you're going to bring drama into my life-into my family's life, I need to know about it upfront. Oh and as you can see, I'll be able to tell if you're lying so just tell the truth and we'll be good." Gemma stared at her waiting for a response.

"Okay." Tara whispered.

"Good. Follow me." She climbed in her car and led the way to her house.

Tara wasn't sure what to think. This woman didn't know her. Why was she helping her?

Gemma got Tara settled in the guest room, got her dirty clothes in the wash and let Tara shower.

She came back downstairs when she finished her shower just as Gemma had ordered.

"Eat." Gemma motioned toward the table that was full of fried chicken, mashed potatoes, corn, and rolls. "I heated up the left-overs from tonight's supper."

Tara sat and ate. The food was delicious.

"Now tell me. What's going on? Start from the beginning and tell me everything." Gemma sat down across from her.

Tara took a sip of her water. "My parents died in a car wreck when I was 16. We had a fight because they had told me that I was adopted. I ran out of the house like the stupid teenager I was and they were killed in a wreck while out trying to find me." She paused to wipe her eyes. She had never forgiven herself for her parents dying. "I hated myself. It was my fault. If I hadn't been a dumbass teenager, then they wouldn't have been out driving in the rain and wouldn't have slid off of the road into that tree." She paused again and took another deep breath. "Anyways, as I was put into the foster care system I was in and out of differenthomes. Each one worse than the last. One of the men thinking I was a hot young piece of ass and could sneak into my bed and do whatever he wanted to me anytime he wanted. The lady not caring either way as long as she got her check at the end of the month for me. I ran from that home and was finally placed with a nice lady who never hurt me, she let me come and go as I pleased as long as I was back in the house by 11 p.m. she didn't care. That's when I met Alec. He was a nice guy, I thought I loved him. He asked me to marry him after only a few months and I stupidly agreed being the naïve girl that I was. I honestly thought he loved me. Things changed. He became possessive, abusive, and downright scary. I knew I had to get away from him as soon as possible. I refused to be one of those people who stay in an abusive relationship for love or the idea of love." Tara paused taking a sip of water. "I started looking into my biological parents. So far I've been coming up empty handed since the family asked to remain anonymous. All I've been able to find out is that they lived in California. I don't know where in California so I looked at a map of the state and picked a city to move to. I liked the name of this town, it kind of sounded like a fairy tale and since I've been living in a nightmare, a fairytale sounded like a nice change. Here I am. It took more money than I was anticipating in gas to get here and since Alec blocked my account so I couldn't take any money out I was only able to save back a little bit." Tara stopped speaking and waited for Gemma's response.

Gemma stared at her, studying her face, her expressions. She felt a connection with this girl. She could see and hear the truth in Tara's confession. This girl had a hard life over the past few years and was doing everything in her power to better herself and her life. All she needed was a hand, a hand that Gemma was willing to give her. She didn't know what it was about this girl but she felt protective over her just like she did her own kids.

"Well sweetheart you landed yourself right in the middle of a family. A family that will do anything to help you out. We're a big family, as you'll soon see. How old are you? That's one thing you haven't said. You'll start work at TM in a few days. I'll let you get settled. We'll get rid of that car in case your ex decides to track you. We'll get you another one. Here's some money in case you need anything else that we don't have here." Gemma handed her $200.

Tara was stunned. She had never had someone go out of their way to help her especially since this woman didn't even know her. "Why? Why would you help me out like this? You hardly know me." Tara asked.

"I've never had a daughter. I've always wanted one. I can see the struggle you're facing. You shouldn't have to face it alone. As I said you have a family now." Gemma winked. "You didn't say how old you are."

"I'm 18. I'll be 19 in a few months." Tara answered, she stuffed the last piece of chicken in her mouth. She hadn't felt this full in a long time.

"I have a son that just turned 19. Jax. You'll meet him in the morning. You look exhausted, go on up to bed and rest. I'll see you in the morning at breakfast. I've got to run across town back to the office. So you'll have the house to yourself for a while." Gemma hugged her.

"Thank you." Tara whispered. "I'll find a way to repay you for all your kindness. I don't like asking people for help but you will never know how much I appreciate all of your hospitality."

"You didn't ask. I insisted. No need to thank me sweetheart." Gemma hugged her one more time before leaving.

Tara cleaned her dishes and went back upstairs to lay down. Gemma was right she was extremely tired. As soon as she laid down she felt her whole body relax. It didn't take long for her to fall soundly asleep.

She woke to a commotion downstairs a few hours later. She could feel her heart beating heavily against her chest.

She eased her way downstairs to see what the noise was. Her face flushed bright red when she saw a man in the kitchen naked drinking out of the milk jug. His back was to her, she eyed his back side up and down until he turned around and faced her giving her a full-frontal view.

"I'm…I'm…I'm sorry." She stammered, her hand shielding her eyes-fighting the urge to take another peek and turned and scurried back up the stairs to the safety of her room.

She was almost sure she wouldn't forget the sight of his impressive anatomy in the near future. She was also almost certain he was drunk by the way he kept swaying like he was going to tip over at any second so she hoped he would not remember that she had saw him naked. She would certainly remember though. She smiled to herself.

She heard another crash a few minutes later right outside of her door. She opened the door and found him passed out on his stomach.

She rolled her eyes but chuckled to herself. She didn't hesitate to check out what she could see of his muscular body, suddenly wishing he had fallen on his back instead. She internally chastised herself. She should be helping him instead of admiring his nakedness.

"Wake up." She shook him. "Come on, I can't lift you by myself. I need you to help me out a little bit."

After a few failed attempts at shaking him she went to her next option and got a pitcher of cold water. She poured it over his head and stood back waiting for whatever reaction he had-not wanting to be in the line of fire if he got up swinging at his assailant.

He jumped up and she bit back a laugh. "Come on, you passed out. Let me help you to bed.

She wrapped her arm around his waist and tried to lead him to the only other room that could be his. " Get the hell off me, bitch" He pulled away from her and slammed the door in his room.

She was stunned. "You're welcome, asshole. I could've left you laying on the cold hardwood floor." She shouted before covering her mouth in case Gemma was home.

She let the door slam behind her. He was definitely the most-sexy man she had ever laid eyes on but clearly he was a dick. She turned off her bedside lamp and curled back up under the blanket.

She woke up to the bright sun shining through her window and also the smell coming from downstairs was amazing. She threw her hair up in a messy pony-tail and followed the scent to the kitchen.

"Good morning, sweetheart. Sleep okay?" Gemma greeted her with a smile. "Clay, this is Tara. Tara, my husband Clay." Gemma introduced the two and went back to flipping pancakes.

"Nice to meet you sweetheart, want some coffee?" Clay held out a cup to her.

"Sure. Thanks. Nice to meet you too, sir." Tara graciously took the cup from him.

"Just call me Clay." He winked and went back to reading his paper.

"Jackson Teller, get your ass out of that bed." Gemma yelled up the stairs. "Breakfast is ready and you've got shit to do."

A few minutes later Jax came down the stairs. "Ah, there you are. Jax, meet Tara." Gemma stated. "You're going to be showing her the ropes today while I get some shit done at the office."

"I don't have time to babysit your little stray mother, I've got shit to do too." He protested. He didn't even look up at her.

Gemma slapped him in the back of his head.

"Fucking some crow-eater wanna-be gash is not more important than showing our guest around. Now eat your breakfast and do as your told." Gemma growled- shaking her head. Sometimes her son could be a real pain in the ass, but she had never seen him this way with a female especially a female as pretty as Tara.

Tara felt the tears welling up in her eyes. "Stray" He had just referred to her like she was an animal. "It's okay. I've already navigated around the town. I don't wanna intrude on him. Excuse me." She left her almost uneaten plate of food sitting there and ran upstairs to get dressed.

She wasn't sure what she had done to make him dislike her so intensely. She threw on her clothes and snuck back downstairs to the door. She repacked the bag she had unpacked last night. This was obviously not going to work out here as much as she hoped it would.

"Going somewhere." Jax's spoke quietly.

"Yeah. I didn't mean to intrude on your life. I'm just going to go." She stated, not looking up at him.

"Look. I'm sorry. I didn't mean what I said. I've got some shit going on and I didn't mean to take it out on you. Please don't go. You're not intruding, I'd love to show you around."

She finally looked up at him and he looked sincere. "It's okay really. I was in town a few days before I ran into your mom. I already know pretty much everything about the town." She sighed.

He placed his hand over top of hers. "Stay." He whispered.

She felt goosebumps pop up all over her body when he touched her. "Okay, It'll only be a couple of days. I really don't wanna be a bother." She took her packed bag back upstairs to her room opting to leave it packed this time so she could make a quick get-away if she needed. Jax followed her up the stairs.

"You're not a bother. I'm just an asshole sometimes, as you pointed out last night." He smirked at her and her face flushed bright red again. He had heard her and he remembered it.

"In my defense you called me a bitch." She narrowed her eyes biting back a smile.

"Yeah. Asshole remember? Sorry bout that. Really." He shrugged. "So what do ya say? You wanna go get the Jax Teller VIP tour of Charming and the surrounding areas?" He raised his eyebrows waiting on a response.

"If you're sure." She hesitated.

"I said I'm sorry for being an ass, please don't keep making me apologize for it. I'm sure. Let's go. You ever rode on a bike before?" He questioned.

"No, but I've always wanted to." She answered, she could hear the excitement in her voice and she knew he could too since he smirked at her reaction.

"Well let's go darlin." He led her outside to his bike.

She caught a glimpse of Gemma and Clay smiling at them from the corner of her eye. She shook her head, making a mental note to ask Gemma about it later…maybe.

"Here." Jax strapped a helmet to her head.

She was sure the helmet made her look dorky but she would take the dorkiness over a crushed skull any day.

"Okay, you ready?" Jax asked-getting settled in front of her. She nodded. "Hold on tight."

She held on as tight as she could. She relaxed immediately. This felt natural to her although she had never done it before-almost as if riding was in her blood.

"How was it?" He asked. The expression on her face told him everything he needed to know. She loved it.

"It was exhilarating!" She exclaimed. She was excited and ready to go again. She hopped off the back and looked around at all of the beautiful scenery. There was a field full of flowers and a small body of water with baby ducks playing. The shade trees made for a nice spot for a picnic area or a place to just lounge and read. Tara loved it. It was one of the prettiest places she had ever seen.

"That's good." He said. He led her to the shady spot under the big shade tree and they sat down.

"I'm sorry about the way I acted. I can be a jackass sometimes. I shouldn't have taken my shit out on you." He apologized again.

"It's okay, I understand. Trust me." She patted his knee and turned her head to look back out at the ducks playing in the water.

"No, it's not okay. It wasn't right of me to be such a jerk. Mom told me you were going through a lot; she didn't say what though. Care to enlighten me?" He questioned.

"It's a long story." She sighed. "It's not something I want to get into right now."

"I get that. I'm here when you do though." He nodded.

"Thanks, Jax. Maybe you're not a total asshole." She winked, lightening the mood.

"Usually I am. You caught me in a good mood." He smirked.

They laughed together but sat in silence for a while. It was refreshing being here in this spot at this moment. She didn't have to worry about anyone or anything. She could be herself, the carefree 18 year old, she was supposed to be. She was at peace; it was something she hadn't felt in a long time.

"I am too, you know." She stated, breaking the silence.

Jax raised his eyebrows at her in question.

"Here if you need someone to talk to. You said you had a lot going on, so I just wanted you to know I'm a good listener if you ever need an ear." She explained.

"Thank you." He nodded at her. "You wanna go tour some more of the town or you wanna head back to the clubhouse and meet some of the guys?"

"Might as well meet them now. I start work there tomorrow." She stood up and dusted off her jeans.

The ride back ended entirely too soon for Tara.

"Listen up, everyone." Jax whistled, calling everyone's attention. "This is Tara Knowles. She starts working here tomorrow, she's staying at Gemma's for a while. Everyone make her feel welcome!" Jax hopped down off the picnic table.

"Thanks, I think." Tara looked around at all of the eyes on her. Being in the foster system, she learned to blend in. She didn't like all of this attention on her at one time. She would have preferred to meet them all individually instead of in a group.

"No problem, darlin." Jax grinned. "This is my boy, Opie and his girl Donna." He told her.

"Hey." Tara smiled politely.

"Hey." Opie replied. Donna just nodded at her and turned her attention back to Opie, whispering in his ear.

Tara excused herself. She was pretty sure that chic didn't like her hanging around her man. She laughed to herself. She had nothing to worry about, he wasn't her type and she didn't go after taken men anyways.

She was greeted by several of the members and sneered at by the half dressed women that were lurking around. All of the guys seemed nice enough here but the girls, not so much.

She hung out in the office with Gemma, opting to get started learning the job than hang outside dodging hateful glares from these people she didn't even know.

"What do you think?" Gemma asked.

"It seems pretty self-explanatory. I think I can handle it." Tara answered, looking over the list of things to remember that Gemma gave her.

"No, I mean what do you think about it here? The people?" She asked again, lighting up her smoke.

"Oh, all of the guys seemed real nice and welcoming. I must have pissed off some of the girls when I was here the other day. I don't know what I did…." Tara's words trailed off as she was thinking of why they were glaring at her like they were.

"Don't worry about them. They're just worried that one of these men, Jax in particular, is going to make you an old lady and they don't want that to happen." Gemma explained.

"An old lady?" Tara asked.

"When a member settles down with a woman as a girlfriend, wife, she his old lady. He'll brand her with his crow."

"His what?" Tara interrupted, raising her eyebrows, stifling a giggle.

"Crow." Gemma smirked. She knew how bizarre this sounded to an outsider but she didn't want Tara to feel like an outsider any longer so she made sure to explain what she meant. "The club is referred to as SAMCRO so when a member picks someone to be his old lady, she gets a crow tattoo that tells everyone she's taken and no other member can mess with her. Being an old lady means you're there for the man, you love the man and you love the club or you learn to love the club. It means that member is no longer free-dick to these crow-eaters but sometimes you still have to educate." Gemma watched Tara's expression as she took everything in.

"They don't have to worry about me, I'm just an employee." Tara shook her head. This club stuff always fascinated her, although she had only seen it on television.

"Yeah, they should worry though." Gemma winked but didn't say another word. "Okay kid time to hang out somewhere else I've got some shit to take care of. You can worry about this stuff later."

Tara walked around outside looking for Jax, hoping he could take her home. She wasn't feeling all of this attention today especially from the crow-eaters as Gemma called them.

"That the bitch you're fucking around on me with?" She heard a voice growl. Tara stepped to walk away not wanting to intrude on anyone's conversation.

"What? She's just a girl my mom is helping. Chill the fuck out. She's no one." Tara froze when she heard Jax's voice.

"I saw the way you looked at her, Jax. You are either fucking her or you want to." The angry woman hissed.

"Maybe I have, Maybe I do. That's not your concern. All you need to be concerned with is putting my cock in your mouth or getting the fuck out of here and I'll find someone who will." Jax snarled.

She walked away not wanting to hear anymore. She had met guys like him before—the guys who could get anything they wanted from anyone they wanted. Alec was that type of guy and she wasn't one to make the same mistake twice.

There was a party going on at TM and Tara had talked with members and she even talked some with Donna, although she was still certain that she didn't like her. She managed to avoid Jax which was easy since he was hanging out with a different girl every time she saw him.

"Hey, I haven't had a chance to meet you yet. I'm Juice."

"Tara." She smiled, shaking the hand he had offered.

"Can I get you a drink?" He asked.

"Sure. Thank you." She answered, following him to the bar.

They stood at the bar and talked. He was nice, very polite. He seemed almost shy, as if he were nervous. She noticed that Jax stood on the other side of the room staring at them when he wasn't occupied with whatever girl was fighting for his attention. Tara shook her head to clear her thoughts she wasn't going to give him any more of hers.

"Well Juice, tonight has been fun. I should get home though. I need to get some sleep before my first day tomorrow. Maybe I'll see you sometime tomorrow?" She asked.

"Yeah, definitely. You want a ride home?" He offered.

"You sure you don't mind leaving the party? I don't wanna pull you away from anything. I can walk. It's no big deal." She replied, glancing up to see Jax still staring in their direction ignoring the girl his arm was wrapped around.

"Na, I'm probably gonna crash out too. I can give you a lift though." He held out his hand to her.

She took his hand and he led her outside to his bike. He handed her his helmet.

"Where are you two off to?" She heard Jax's voice behind her.

"I'm just giving Tara a ride home." Juice answered, not noticing Jax's nostrils beginning to flare.

"Go ahead back inside bro. I can take her." Jax countered.

"It's no problem. I don't mind taking her." Juice stated.

"I got it bro." Jax growled. "Go back to the party."

"Juice can take me home." Tara intervened. She didn't want this to get any more out of hand.

"You sure?" Juice turned and questioned Tara. "I don't mind if you want him to take you." He looked away. He got his share of girls but nowhere near as many as the heir to the President's throne.

"I'm sure." She smiled sweetly at him and turned her glare to Jax. Who the hell did he think he was-ignore her all night and then want to step up when she finally starts having a good time.

"Juice, give us a minute." Jax ordered. Juice hesitated but did as he was told.

"What's wrong with you? I'm going home anyways, why don't you want me to take you?" He questioned her.

"Just get back to one of the many girls you've been with since we arrived this afternoon." She shook her head, rolling her eyes.

"That's what this is? You're jealous?" He laughed in disbelief.

"Coming from the man who watched me talk to someone else for over an hour and decides to go home the moment I leave with him? On top of that now you're whining that I chose to ride home with him instead of you and give some bullshit excuse that you were going home anyways? I'm not stupid, Jax. If I would have been in there all alone, you would have been balls deep in one of those nasty girls but since I wasn't alone you decided it was time to interrupt my night with your jealousy?" She hissed at him. "If you're going to play this game, be man enough to admit it."

"I'm not playing a game darlin, I have a headache. I've had enough pussy for one night. I was really going home but if you want to be a bitch about it then walk home for all I care." He shouted at her and stormed back inside to Juice.

"Give her a ride home and that's it. Do you understand?" Jax growled in his ear. "Drop her off and leave."

"Got it man." Juice shook his head in anger. "You ready?" He asked her.

"What was all that about?" Opie asked Jax.

"Don't know what you're talking about bro." Jax replied, not taking his eyes off of Tara's back fading in the distance.

"Right." Opie laughed.

"Whatever bro. I'm going home. I'll catch ya later." Jax climbed on his bike and sped off.

Opie laughed harder. Normally Jax would be here in bed with whatever pussy was on the menu that night and that probably would have been the case if Juice wasn't making a move on the new girl.

Jax raced back home but Juice's bike wasn't there. He hurried inside and looked for Tara, but she wasn't there either.

"Damnit." He growled.

Jax heard a bike pull up and ran outside. It was only Opie.

"What are you doing here?" Jax asked, walking past him.

"You alright?" Opie smirked.

"Yeah." Jax growled.

Juice pulled up as Jax had just climbed back on his bike to go search for the two.

"Get lost?" Jax turned his gaze to Juice in question.

"Na man, we just stopped and let her get a milkshake. That's all." Juice explained.

"What's it to you?" Tara hissed. "You're not my father and the last time I checked I was NO ONE to you so why don't you just back the fuck off." She narrowed her eyes at him.

Jax's eyes went wide. She knew that he realized what she meant by that. He had called her a no one earlier that night and he now knew that she heard him.

She turned her back to him. "Thanks for the ride, Juice." She leaned in and kissed his cheek and walked up the stairs leaving the both of them speechless.

Jax eyes were deadly and they were locked on Juice's.

"I…man…she just wanted a milk shake, I…." Juice stammered.

"Go home." Jax growled, his jealousy and frustration getting the best of him. "NOW."

Juice left without another word.

Opie snickered. "That girl's a pistol, I like her."

"Fuck off, bro." Jax glared at him. "See you tomorrow." He said in dismissal.

Opie climbed on his bike still laughing. Things could get a little less boring in Charming.


	2. Chapter 2

"What the hell is your problem?" Jax stalked after her refusing to let her out of talking to him.

"Go to hell." She snapped, shutting her door in his face.

"Baby, I'm already there." He scowled at her through the door. This girl was working his last nerve. "How about you cut the shit and tell me what your problem is."

She jerked the door open. "You're my problem asshole." She crossed her arms over her chest, waiting on whatever retort she knew was coming.

"Me?" He held a finger to his chest causing her to roll her eyes at him again. "What the hell did I do?"

"We've already been through all of this, Jackson. Why do you want to go through it again?" She groaned.

"Maybe because I don't understand where this bitchy attitude is coming from. We were having fun earlier and then you did a 180 and are being a total bitch." He stated, returning the glare she was giving him.

"You're right. We were having fun; it was a nice evening until you introduced me to everyone saying make me feel welcome but the one who makes me feel the least welcome around here is you."

"Excuse me, I've been nothing but nice to you." He interrupted her.

"Yeah? You call me a stray. No strike that, I'll even let that one go. You bail on me during the party, leaving me alone to hang out with total strangers then you call me a NO ONE to some random whore then in the next sentence you tell her maybe you've slept with me. I don't know about you, but I think I'd remember fucking a jackass."

"I.." He started to interrupt her again.

"No, shut the hell up. You wanted to have this talk so you can stand there and listen. You ignore me and flirt with random girls, I don't know if that was your lame attempt to make me jealous or what but then you come off half-cocked when I finally have someone who's interested in talking to me and not every slut in the building. You try to scare him away from talking to me. You finally decide to man up and be a friend. That's no friend, Jax. That's you trying to have control over me and who I talk to and I've been down that road once before and I WILL NOT go down it again."

"So it all comes back to you were jealous because I wasn't hanging out with you." He sneered.

"If that's what you got out of that then so be it. I'm going to bed. Goodnight, Jackson." She shut the door in his face not giving him another chance to speak.

He leaned up against her door, shaking his head and turning on his heels and going back to the clubhouse. He had to clear his head and getting pussy was the best way to do that.

"What's wrong gorgeous, did the 'No One' not give it up to you after-all?" Wendy taunted him.

"Shut up and bend over." He ordered, not in the mood for her games tonight. Wendy was a good lay but she was getting to mouthy and that would just not work out especially since all she seemed to wanna talk about is Tara. He was here to get Tara off of his mind.

He slammed into her hard, not caring if it was how she wanted it. It's not like he really took much consideration into what they wanted anyways, they were here to service him. Besides it was a privilege being the one he chose that night.

"Get dressed, clean this mess up, then get out." He barked, climbing out of bed and sliding into his jeans.

"You good?" Op questioned him. He didn't mention Tara specifically but he didn't have to. He and Jax always had a bond, they knew what the other was thinking without having to say it.

"That girl's a bitch." Jax replied.

"Why? Cause she don't put up with your shit?" Opie countered, chuckling.

"Man she bitched me out for nothing. She's not just a bitch, she's a jealous one." Jax stated, taking a hit from the joint Opie had passed him.

"That's bullshit brother." Opie objected. "I'm your friend, your best friend so it's my job to tell you like it is and the shit you're laying right now…it's bullshit. You can't stand there and tell me that you have no fault in this. You dared Juice to make a move on her, promising him an ass-whoopin' if he did, but yet she's the jealous one? I think what's really got you tweaked is she calls you out on your shit and you don't like it, but you can't get enough of her."

"What are you a shrink now?" Jax scoffed.

"Damn straight. Maybe I should start charging your ass for all of these heart to hearts." Opie snickered.

"I don't know man; this girl knows how to press my buttons. That's for damn sure." Jax shook his head, his dick ached just thinking about her.

"Didn't notice." Opie laughed. "Well brother, I'm out. Donna's waiting on me in some sexy lingerie she bought this morning.

"Aight bro. Later."

The next morning Tara was up bright and early preparing for her day at work. She ate breakfast in silence.

"Jax here?" Gemma asked.

Tara shook her head but kept quiet.

"You patch things up?" Gemma questioned.

Of course she heard their fight, everyone at the clubhouse probably heard it or heard about it.

"Nothing to patch up. Jax and I are just friends-if that." Tara replied, standing to wash her breakfast plate.

Gemma nodded. She knew her son and he definitely had feelings for this girl if he didn't let his dick get in the way. She had a feeling that Tara had feelings for him too or she wouldn't let him get to her the way he did. "Okay. Whatever you say. I'll see you at the office. Oh and here's the keys to your new car Clay picked out for you." Gemma handed her a set of keys.

Tara was stunned when she saw her new car. It was so much nicer than the piece of shit she came here with. A black Cutlass in mint condition. She loved it.

"The car is perfect. Thank you. I love it." She hugged Clay as soon as she saw him. "How much do I owe you? I know you had to pay more than what you got out of mine."

"Eh, another a hug and I'd say we're even." He replied, giving her a warm smile. He didn't normally take up with outsiders but he really cared about Tara in the short time that he had known her.

She graciously accepted his offer, giving him two more for good measure. "Thank you again. I better get to work." She smiled and bounced off toward the office.

Jax had been watching from the distance. He loved seeing her so happy but found his jealousy soaring again that he wasn't the cause of that happiness.

He sauntered into the office. "What's on the agenda today, ma?"

"Tara's in charge today. I've got a lot to do around town." Gemma stated, giving the last bit of papers to Tara with the instructions.

"You've been busy lately. Something going on?" Jax questioned. Gemma was always busy but he's barely seen her lately which was unlike the matriarch. She usually was always in his business.

"I'm what keeps this business, club, and family up and running of course I'm busy." Gemma stated matter-of-factly.

"Yeah you've always been the glue that kept us whole but you're busier now."

"I don't know what to tell you, Jackson. Maybe now you are just noticing exactly how busy that is." She interrupted him, ending the conversation.

"Here's a tow-order you need to go get." Tara handed him the papers but didn't look in his direction.

"Sure you don't want your boyfriend to do it? He might get jealous you giving me special treatment and all?" Jax smirked.

"I'm sure, sweetheart. You see if he's out on the road doing a job then I can't see him and all of his sexiness from this window and I'd be stuck looking at you. So no, I'm sure you can go." Tara taunted, winking at him.

Jax stormed out of the office. "Let's go Juice. We've got a tow to pick up."

Tara laughed, of course he would take Juice with him. She didn't expect any less. She shook her head at how absurd all of this was.

She went back to her work not giving him another thought.

"You and Tara dating?" Jax asked.

"No, I don't think so." Juice answered. "I like her though." He hinted.

Jax's hand gripped the steering wheel tighter. "I don't know bro, she's not really your type is she?"

"Is she yours?" Juice boldly asked. "I mean no disrespect but you don't want her, you just don't want her with me or anyone else."

Jax glared out the window. Juice was right, but he would never admit it. "Just stay away from her. That's an order."

Juice nodded but had other plans in mind. Jax had no right to tell him who he could or couldn't date. His personal life wasn't club business, so he wasn't obligated to follow any orders.

"I'll be right back." Juice said as they got back to the shop. "Gotta piss."

Juice went to handle his business and gather his courage. Tara was standing outside of the office when he came out of the bathroom.

He walked up to her, pulled her in his arms and kissed her slipping his tongue in to her mouth. He could feel her hesitation but at this moment only wanted to show Jax that he wasn't in charge of this aspect in his life.

"Um…" Tara pulled back, "Thank you?" She said, unsure of what to say. She turned and saw the deadly glare in Jax's eyes as he stalked toward the two of them.

She stepped in front of Juice, "Stop." She hissed. "Back off."

"You seem to be going deaf." Jax ignored her, his eyes solely on the man behind her.

"No, I heard you." Juice stepped around her. "You didn't hear me. I like her. You don't get to tell me who I can be with and who I can't."

Juice didn't have time to react before Jax knocked him to the ground. "Is that so?"

"Stop it, Jax." Tara shouted pulling him off of Juice. "What the hell is wrong with you?"

One minute she was pulling him off of Juice and the next Jax had his mouth on hers holding her tightly against him.

He pulled back and she was in a daze. She had not been expecting this-any of it.

"What was that?" She whispered, her fingers grazing over lips.

"You can't be with him." Jax stated, his voice husky. "You need to be with me."

"Sonofabitch!" Juice shouted. "You don't even want her." He reiterated his previous words.

"Whoa, back up. You don't want to do this." Opie held Juice back, saving him from the beat down Jax would surely give him.

"Get off me." Juice struggled against Opie's grip.

"He's right. You don't want me." Tara sighed backing out of his hold. "You are a player and I don't play games. If you really care for me, prove it and leave him alone." She whispered.

Jax stared after her shocked. No one had turned him down before, he wasn't sure how to react.

"Let him go." He ordered Opie. He turned his glare to Juice, "Stay away from her. That's your last warning."

"No." Juice growled. "I won't."

"Give me a reason, I'm begging you." Jax's eyes glistened, daring Juice to make a move.

"Enough." Clay's voice boomed. "Neither one of you shitheads are good enough for her. If she's smart she'll stay away from both of you."

Tara chuckled quietly inside the office. Never in a million years did she expect to be fought over and kissed by two guys all in the same day.

She lightly traced her lips with her fingertips, she could still feel his lips on hers. Butterflies filled her stomach. She had wondered what it would be like to kiss him the moment she saw him naked in the kitchen, but never thought it would actually happen.

"Where's Gem?" Clay asked, pulling her from her internal instant replay of the kiss.

"I'm not sure. She just said she had some stuff to do and left." Tara shrugged.

"You know sweetheart, if you're slightly interested in either one of those knuckleheads you need to make a decision. Otherwise they're going to kill each other." He winked and walked away.

She was resigned to playing it smart and not being with either of them. She remembered Gemma's words about not wanting unnecessary drama and she had a feeling being with either of them would cause drama and animosity to the club.

The rest of the day was uneventful. She found herself imagining that Jax would come back in there and make a move.

"Tara?" Juice approached her as she was getting ready to leave.

"Yeah?" She asked, sliding into her sweater.

"I was wondering if you'd like to go on a date with me tomorrow night?" He looked nervous and it was adorable.

She sighed. "I don't think that's a good idea. I like you but I don't want to cause trouble between you and Jax. I know overall that would cause problems within the club and I don't want to do that. So I've decided not to date either of you."

Juice shook his head. "You won't cause a problem. Trust me. Jax and I go through this a lot. We fight, we're like brothers. It's what we do."

"I've already caused problems. Look at your face." Tara objected pointing out his black eye.

"We're guys. This is normal. Think about it. Please, at least do that." He pleaded.

Tara nodded in agreement and Juice left the office leaving her with her thoughts.

"Let me give you a ride." Jax offered as she walked out.

"Thanks, but I've got my car. Remember?" She pointed at the car she received this morning.

"Right." Jax nodded, remembering the car his mom and Clay bought her.

"See you later." She waved, climbing into the Cutlass.

"Later." He muttered after she was already gone.

Gemma wasn't home when Tara arrived, she hadn't seen her at all since she left this morning on an important errand. She was beginning to worry but didn't know her well enough to know her routine and really didn't want to get in the middle of whatever she had going on. She definitely didn't want to be a problem for her especially after she's gone out of her way to help her.

She ordered a pizza since no one was home. She didn't want to cook a big meal for just her. She liked to cook, her mom made sure she learned at young age just in case anything should ever happen to her. Cooking in the kitchen with her was one of Tara's favorite childhood memories.

Jax strolled in right after the pizza arrived. "Hungry?" She asked.

"Sure. Thanks." He took a slice and sat beside her. "So what's the deal with you and Juice?" He questioned getting right to the point.

"None of your business." She replied, rolling her eyes. "I'm not in the mood to argue so let's just eat in peace."

"I'm not arguing. I'm telling you, you and him is not going to happen." He stared at her-waiting for her to protest.

"You may be right," She nodded. "but if I choose to be with him then that's between him and me. Not you and me, or you and him. Got it?"

"No, you and him are not going to be in any sort of relationship. Got it?" He threw her words back at her.

She stared at him in disbelief. She scoffed and shook her head. "You don't get to dictate who I do or don't have a relationship with."

"When they're a member of my club darlin, I do." He retorted.

"No Jackson. You don't. If I want to fuck every member of your club that's what I'll do and there's not a damn thing you can do to stop me." She snapped.

"Ah so you want to be a crow-eater then?" He questioned, eyebrows raised. "If that's the case then let's go upstairs and I'll show you what being a club-whore means. I promise you darlin, it's not as appealing as it looks."

"If I wanted lessons sweetheart," She straddled his lap and leaned forward to whisper in his ear. "I'd call someone else." She stood back up and watched the mixture of emotions flash through his eyes. Anger, lust, but mostly anger but he was speechless. "Sweet dreams, Jax."

She heard his fist connect with something, the table or the wall maybe? Gemma would kick his ass if he ruined her furniture. She smiled to herself. She hated being a bitch to him but he kept pushing her. He was always ordering her around and that just wasn't happening. One controlling relationship in her life was one to many. History would not be repeating itself.

She turned on the shower and climbed in letting the hot water cascade over her tired limbs. Her neck hurt so bad like it did when she was sleeping in her car. Her whole body was just sore and exhausted.

She finished her shower and wrapped in her bathrobe and went back downstairs to watch television. Jax's bike was no longer in the driveway so he must have went off to pout.

She fell asleep watching some boring night time sitcom. She heard the sounds of giggles and the door slam a little while later.

Jax came staggering into the room, a crow-eater attached to his hip.

"Get lost." He ordered Tara. "If you don't want to watch me fuck her right here in front of you then go. If you want to join in be my guest." His speech was slurred, she had to piece together what he was saying.

"No thanks. STD's aren't on my bucket-list. You have fun with that though." She winked.

"I don't have an STD bitch." The girl he was with ran up behind her pushing her into the staircase railing.

"You sure? Fucking multiple guys just to get five minutes of fame from an MC member or whoever is willing to give you attention. You might want to get tested." Tara turned to walk away again before the girl grabbed her hair.

"I've been waiting to do this since the day you brought your pretty face to TM." The girl slapped her across the cheek.

Tara grabbed the girl's hand after the first slap and threw her into the wall behind them and punched her square in the nose. The girl fell to the floor crying to Jax to help her. "Bitch." Tara muttered, turning on her heels to face Jax.

"Control your groupies next time." Tara spat at him before walking back up the stairs.

"Do something. She hit me." Tara could hear her protesting to Jax.

"You started it. Get up and get out." He barked.

"I thought you wanted to fuck." She purred.

"If I really wanted to that, I would have done it back at the clubhouse now get lost."

Tara rolled her eyes, she knew this was another lame attempt to make her jealous. She hated to admit that it had worked-a little.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" She came barreling down the stairs to confront him as soon as she heard the front door slam.

"What are you referring to this time?" He asked.

"Why do you have to be such a dick? I thought you wanted to be friends but then you come in here giving me orders of what I can and can't do or just being a total ass in general. Why?" She shouted. She could never fully gather her thoughts when he was around.

"Maybe I'm just an ass." He conceded.

"Honestly Jax, I don't think you are as much as you're trying to make yourself out to be but what I don't understand is why you're doing this. You have the ability to be a nice guy. I've seen it when you took me to that park outside of town. Then you turn right back into Captain Ass-hat." She sighed. "I just don't know what I did to make you hate me so much."

Her words shocked him, even in his drunken state. "You think I hate you?" He asked incredulously.

"I don't know what to think. You're so hot and cold. You leave me so damn frustrated and confused." She admitted, twisting her fingers together.

"What do you think you do to me?" He stepped toward her. "I've never met anyone like you. I can't figure you out and it drives me crazy. I don't hate you. I've wanted you from the moment I saw you in the kitchen when you walked in on me naked. I know I can't have you and it's twisting me all up. I'm sorry for being an asshole, I just don't know how to react when I'm with you."

She pondered his words. "Well not being an asshole is a better reaction than making me feel like shit." She sighed. "I've wanted you too, but we can't go there. I've had a man control me and it was ugly and I fought like hell to get away from it. I can't go back to that. Even if I'm going crazy right now not feeling your lips on mine again." She felt her face burning at her honesty.

He shook his head stepping even closer to her. "I'm not trying to control you, Tara."

"You may not be trying but telling me who I can or can't be with is controlling. I just can't. I'm sorry." She kissed his cheek.

"It's not that I'm controlling you." He held onto her hand. "I just can't see you with a member of my club. Not when I want you so damn bad."

"We'll talk when you sober up. I need to know that what you're saying is you and not the booze." She kissed his cheek once again before pulling away.

"It's all me, Tara." He argued.

"Goodnight." She gave him a small smile before leaving him alone downstairs.

"You'll see." He called up after her. "Goodnight."

She lay in bed processing all of what he said. As much as she wanted to believe him they were just words. He was going to have to prove them and that wouldn't happen overnight.

"Hey old man." Gemma walked into the cabin with a smile.

"What in the hell are you doing all the way up here? Everything alright?" Piney asked.

"Yeah, everything is good. Just thought I'd come up here and make sure you hadn't drunk yourself to death."

"My boy send you up here to check on me?" He questioned.

"No, but I need you to come back with me." Gemma sat down across from him.

"I'll be back next week, just like always." He shook his head. He loved the club but loved his alone time up here at the cabin too.

"I need you to come back now." Gemma objected.

"What in the hell for?" He barked.

"Cause I'm pretty sure I've found your daughter."

"What?" He whispered, wide eyed.

"Your daughter. You know the infant daughter that you gave away when her mother-my best friend-died during childbirth. You gave her to total strangers all because your bitch wife was mad that you had knocked up another woman." Gemma shouted. "She looks just like Grace. I didn't see it at first until she started talking about she was adopted then it was right there clear as day. She even has her middle name; the adopted parents at least gave her that much of her mother." Gemma wiped a tear from her eye.

"You're sure it's her?" He whispered. "I didn't want her to grow up in this life and I didn't know how to be a father to a little girl. It wasn't because of Mary. She knew I loved Grace, would have left her for Grace if I had the chance to do it over. Grace always wanted more for the baby than becoming someone's old lady. I made that happen, but have thought about her every day since the adoption agency took her away."

Gemma had never heard him speak like this. He always kept things short and to the point, especially after John died. "Come back with me, see for yourself. She's the spitting image of Grace." Gemma smiled. "Our girl found her way back home where she's always belonged."


	3. Chapter 3

"She'll be here for work tomorrow." Gemma confirmed when they arrived back at the clubhouse.

"Gem, for now let's just keep this between us. If it is her I need time to tell both her and Opie. Let's just sit on it for a while." Piney pleaded.

Gemma and Mary were the only ones who knew about his affair with Grace, so no one else should be problem to keep quiet, unless Mary randomly shows up. He highly doubted that would happen. He sighed just thinking about her. He loved her from the moment he saw her, she was the most beautiful woman he'd ever laid eyes on. For some reason, she fell for him too. Mary was pregnant so he stuck by her regardless of his feelings. Grace hid her pregnancy from him all the way up until delivery time. By then it was too late, he could never tell her how much he loved her. She was dead.

"You're not going to want to keep this quiet long, but I'll follow your lead and take it day by day." Gemma agreed, hugging him. She knew how hard this was and how hard it was going to be for him when he saw her.

Jax was still sleeping when Tara left for work. She got up a little early just to avoid him. She had a feeling today he'd be back to being an asshole. It drove her crazy, but it seemed to be the routine.

She grabbed a banana to eat in the car. Gemma was already at TM going over the completed workload from yesterday.

"It all look okay?" Tara asked walking into the office.

"Oh hey, sweetheart. Yeah, it looks good. Great job. I knew you could handle it." Gemma praised. "Today looks to be a light day. A lot of just hanging out until something comes in."

"Works for me, I'm tired." Tara admitted, stifling a yawn.

"Long night?" Gemma asked, she heard some of what happened yesterday from Clay.

"You heard?" Tara asked, sighing when Gemma nodded. "I just don't know what to do, Gem. I don't want to cause any problems within the club and I know picking one over the other would definitely do that."

"Well I can't tell you what to do but I'll tell you this. I'm proud of you for already thinking of the club's benefit over personal gain. You're right, it will cause problems with the boys. Jax is a hot-head and is used to always getting what he wants. A lot of that's my fault, I spoiled him." Gemma admitted, chuckling.

"I've noticed." Tara smiled. "I really like Jax though. I just don't like the fact that he thinks he can tell me what I can or can't do, who I can or can't talk to or the fact that he flirts incessantly with crow-eaters in front of me to make me jealous." Tara frowned.

"I'm not going to make excuses for him because he's going about it all wrong but he's never met anyone as strong willed as you. He's used to girls bowing down just waiting for the chance to get with him. So he's not used to actually have to put forth an effort." Gemma smirked. "Keep doing what you're doing, keep him on his toes and if he keeps trying to make you jealous, give him a dose of his own medicine." Gemma winked at her. "Maybe someone outside of the club though."

Tara nodded, "Well I spend my days here so I'm not sure how I'm supposed to meet anyone but I'll take that under advisement."

"There's plenty of cute guys that bring their car into be serviced, kind of like that one right there." Gemma pointed to a cute boy standing by his mustang.

Tara leaned forward looking out the window. "Well he's no Jax but he's definitely do-able." Tara's face flushed at her words. "That came out wrong. I didn't mean it like that."

Gemma laughed. "Do-able. Huh? Well maybe you should go out there and check him in."

"O….Okay." Tara stammered.

"Hi, how can I help you?" Tara stepped outside asking.

"Hey, Hey there." He answered, adding a little strut to his walk as he came over to her. "My brakes are squealing. Is there any way I can get it checked out today?" He asked.

"Yeah, definitely." Tara smiled. "Can I get your name and number?" She asked.

"Wow, I like a girl who's not afraid to make the first move. I was fixing to ask for yours but this works too."

Tara laughed. "Actually, I needed it for the paperwork so we could call you when the car is ready, but the other works too."

"Oh, I feel so stupid now." He chuckled. "My name is Dean and here's my number." He handed her a card with his number on it. "Call me anytime, about the car or not." He winked.

Jax pulled into the lot.

"Can I get yours?" He asked.

"Tara." She wrote her number on a piece of paper handing it to him.

"What's up?" Jax walked up.

"He needs his brakes fixed." Tara answered.

"I'll have Lowell get right on that." Jax narrowed his eyes at the man in front of him.

"Thanks bro." Dean nodded. "Thank you Tara, maybe I'll call you soon." He winked at her.

"You just randomly give your numbers to strangers?" Jax asked but it sounded more like a statement.

"When they look like that, maybe." Tara smirked, walking back into the office with Jax hot on her heels.

"What the hell, Tara. I thought we moved past all of this bullshit?" He scolded.

"Have we?" She spun around standing toe to toe with him. "It seems to be that you're still trying to be the controlling ass that you've proven to be over and over. You're getting all bent out of shape because I gave a guy a phone number. That doesn't mean I'm jumping into bed with him. I'm not you, Jax. I don't fuck everyone I talk to and I'm sure as hell not one of those girls you entertain on a daily basis, your status in the club means NOTHING to me. If you want to move past this, all of this drama you're bringing needs to stop." She stared at him, waiting for his retort.

"I'm damned if I do and damned if I don't." He answered. "You won't even give me a chance." He spat at her. "I'm done trying to please you."

"You've never even started trying to please me. So far it's only been about you." Tara stared after him her hands shaking. "Hothead. Remember?" Gemma whispered and wrapped her arms around Tara's shoulder.

Piney had watched the whole showdown from the garage door. He knew the moment she emerged from inside the office that Gemma was right, this was definitely his daughter. There was no doubt about it. She looked exactly like his darling Grace. He was proud of her for standing her ground, she definitely had some of his temper in her but mainly he just saw Grace.

"Hi, we haven't met yet." Tara approached him. "I'm Tara." She held out her hand to him.

"Piney. Nice to finally meet you. I've heard a lot about you." He answered.

"You're Opie's dad?" She asked.

Piney nodded, fighting the urge to tell her he was her dad too. He still thought waiting was the best way to go about this.

"Cool. Well I'll see you later. I've got to get back to work." She smiled and walked away. When she smiled, she looked even more like her mom than he'd ever dreamed possible. The resemblance took his breath away.

Tara sat twiddling her thumbs for most of the day, Gemma wasn't lying about it being a slow day.

"You busy?" Donna poked her head in and asked.

"Me?" Tara questioned, a finger pointing at her chest.

"Yeah, you're the only one in here," Donna pointed out. "can we talk?"

"Sure, I guess so. Come in."

Donna sat in Gemma's chair across from her. "What's up?" Tara inquired.

"First, I wanted to apologize for my behavior the other day. I know I came off as bitchy-ish and I'm sorry for that. So many girls come in and out of here all day hitting on Opie so given the circumstances, I figured you'd be the same. I can see that I was wrong, so I wanted to explain my rude behavior and ask if you had any plans later?" She searched Tara's eyes hoping she didn't hold any grudges against her.

"I understand that, there's no hard feelings." Tara sighed looking out the window at the vast number of underdressed women roaming around the lot just waiting on some attention. "I don't have any plans after work. I live a pretty boring life. Work then home." Tara rolled her eyes at how mundane her life had become. It was refreshing, yet boring.

"I think we should change that. I'm in need of a girl's night, interested?" Donna offered.

"Sounds fun." Tara accepted. "I haven't had a girl's night in a long time."

"Okay. Well I'll be hanging around here so we can leave when you get off if you want. I'll let you get back to work." Donna smiled and waved as she walked out the door.

Tara smiled to herself. She may have a friend here after-all.

"So, you and Jax can do your little boy thing…whatever you little boy's do." Donna giggled.

"What changed your mind?" Opie questioned, thinking he was walking into a trap. "You said you wanted me to hang out with you…."

"Hey bro, she's not fighting it. Don't make her change her mind." Jax threw the grease-rag at Opie's shoulder.

"I'm not going to change my mind shithead." Donna rolled her eyes in Jax's direction. "I've got a girl's night planned so go ahead do your thing."

"A girls night? With who? You don't have any girl friends?" Opie countered.

"Yeah normally I don't like girls but Tara's pretty cool from what I can tell and we're going to hang out if you must know." Donna stuck her tongue out in Opie's direction, giggling.

"Tara?" Jax questioned. "As in that Tara in there?"

"Duh. Who else? What's with you?" Donna narrowed her eyes in his direction.

"He's in love." Opie laughed.

"Bullshit. Jax don't do love." Donna giggled.

"Your old lady's right. I don't do love." Jax agreed. "She's just a mystery."

"Right, she's immune to the Jax Teller charm so his usual tricks ain't working. He hates it."

"Fuck you bro. I'm not playing any games or tricks. We're just friends." Jax interrupted, stomping away.

"Awww, he's so cute when he's love-sick and angry." Donna called out loud enough for Jax to hear, laughing when he held up his middle finger at them both.

"So," Jax strolled into the office. "I hear you and Donna have a girl's night planned. How about making it a double-date instead?"

Tara stared at him long and hard, holding back the laughter that was bubbling up in her throat. "That's a good idea. I'll ask her…." She paused watching his excitement build. "I'll have to call and see if Dean's free though."

The crushed look on his face wasn't what she was expecting. She expected him to lash out but he didn't, he just dropped his head, nodded, and walked away.

"Well that was no fun." She muttered.

Tara's shift ended and Donna was waiting on her as promised. Tara saw Jax out of the corner of her eye moping around the shop.

"So what's on the agenda?" Tara asked. "I'll need to go back and change before we do anything."

"Okay, well lets go do that and then we'll decide. I just needed a night out of the house." Donna replied.

Donna sat on Tara's bed while she looked in her closet for something to wear.

"What was with Jax at the end of the day? He came out of the office looking like someone killed his best friend." Donna questioned, looking through Tara's photo album.

"That was my fault." Tara sighed. "He asked if I wanted our girls night to be a double date and I mentioned calling another guy instead, I was just messing around but then he didn't react like I expected so I felt bad. He left before I could apologize."

"Ohhhh." Donna snickered. "Jax really likes you. I've never seen him this torn up over a girl before, ever."

"Really?" Donna had her attention now. She was sure Jax was just playing her but a confirmation that his friends noticed the change him gave her some hope that his words that night were true.

"Yep." Donna nodded. "If you want them to come, I wouldn't mind. I love seeing Opie." She winked at Tara.

"You can call him and see if they wanna come. Jax is probably busy with entertaining the sluts of TM though." Tara could feel her jealousy soaring at the thought.

"Change of plans. I want you and Jax to hang out with us tonight." Donna spoke into the phone. "Okay. See you soon."

"Guess he wasn't too busy after-all." Donna chuckled. "They're meeting us in a few minutes."

"Yeah?" Tara asked suddenly nervous. "What should I wear?" Her choice for the girls night outfit didn't seem adequate enough to be out on a date with Jax.

"Hmm.. Let's see." Donna flipped through the clothes in Tara's closet. "Ah, how about this." She held up Tara's red tank top and jeans with a hole in both knees.

"Okay." Tara shrugged taking the clothes from her. She pulled her hair out of the pony tail letting it cascade around her shoulders.

The guys arrived about an hour later and the butterflies attacked Tara's stomach.

The girls walked down the stairs and greeted their dates.

Tara blushed at the awed expression on Jax's face. "You look beautiful." He said.

"Thank you." She smiled.

"Why don't you tell me I look beautiful anymore?" Donna glared at Opie.

"You're wearing the same thing you were this morning when I said you were beautiful." He reminded her.

"Is there a law against telling me twice?" She playfully slapped him.

Tara laughed at their exchange, she hoped to have an easy love like that someday.

"So what are we doing?" Tara questioned.

"It's a surprise." Jax winked. "We're taking the bike though."

He smiled when her face lit up. She had the most beautiful smile he had ever seen.

"Yeah but before we go do that thing, let's eat first bro. I'm starving." Opie said, rubbing his stomach.

"You're always hungry." Jax grumbled.

"I'm hungry too, grouchy." Tara giggled.

"I've seen you eat babe, you're always hungry too." He laughed when she slapped his shoulder.

"Asshole." She grinned.

He leaned into whisper in her ear. "Beautiful." He stepped back, "So where are we eating?"

"I want pizza." Donna demanded.

"Sounds good to me." Tara agreed, her eyes on Jax's. He hadn't taken his eyes off of her since he walked in the house. Her heart was hammering against her chest.

"Pizza it is." Jax stated, opting to give Tara anything she wanted.

Tara was amazed at how easily she was fitting in with them once she let her guard down and tried. She really liked Opie and Donna, they cracked her up with their bickering. She could see how much love they had for each other.

They had been arguing since they arrived at the pizza joint about what kind of pizza to get. Tara just watched, amused.

"Thank you." Jax whispered in her ear.

"For?" She questioned.

"Giving me a chance." He smiled, a real Jax Teller smile. The one that could melt a heart of ice.

"You're welcome." She kissed his cheek. "So why don't we just get two pizzas?" She asked, an attempt to settle the argument that was still going on with Opie and Donna.

"See. That's why I needed a friend that's a girl. I'm not out numbered anymore." Donna laughed.

"Fine. Two pizzas. One our way," He motioned between Jax and him. "One for the princesses."

"Ahh such a gentleman." Tara chuckled.

"That's me. I'm the poster child for being a gentleman." Opie smirked.

"Yeah, a big gentle bear." Donna wrapped her arms around him kissing his lips.

Jax slid his arm on Tara's shoulder, pulling her a little closer to him.

"I guess the story about not wanting to date either of us was a lie." Juice stood at their table, looking her in the eyes.

"How about you get on with your business and leave her alone." Jax growled.

Juice just shook his head angrily and walking back outside.

"Stop." She placed her hand on his, calming him. "Just let me talk to him for a minute." She pleaded with him with her eyes and he stepped aside so she could get out of the booth.

Tara could sense the anger and tension rolling off Jax but she was impressed he didn't make a scene. He granted her request to talk to Juice herself and not complicate the situation any further.

"Juice, wait!" She called after him.

"What?" He spun around, glaring at her.

"Let me explain." She sighed. "I didn't mean to lie to you. When I said I wasn't going to date either of you, I meant it. I didn't want to complicate things with our friendship or with the club."

"Save it, Tara. I don't care." He interrupted her. "You wanted him, you got him." He turned and left without another word and without giving her the chance to finish what she was trying to say.

She sighed, watched him walk away and went back inside to their group.

"Everything okay?" Donna asked.

Tara shrugged. "He's pissed."

"Fuck him, he's got no reason to be mad." Jax scoffed.

"Actually he does. He asked me out last night and I told him no, I wasn't going to date either of you to keep things uncomplicated. Now here I am, with you and it makes me look like a liar." She defended him.

"That still doesn't give him a reason to act like a little bitch and ruin our date." Jax growled, his temper flaring again. She had just admitted that Juice went behind his back after he told him not to and asked her out.

"Calm down." She whispered, rubbing his hand.

"No. I won't calm down. He deliberately did what I told him not to." He jerked his hand up and Tara shielded her face, protecting herself.

All of the anger and frustration was completely wiped away at her reaction. It was replaced with confusion. "Why are you flinching? I'm not going to hit you. I'd never hurt you."

She dropped her hands down. "Sorry, I know. It's nothing."

Jax stared at her, his mom's words playing back to him about her having a rough few years, he suddenly had an idea of what might have happened and he was pissed.

"You okay?" Donna asked.

Tara nodded, "I'm good."

"That reaction, has a guy hit you before?" Opie asked bluntly.

"Pizza's here." Tara changed the subject.

All three of them just stared at her waiting for her answer.

"We're your friends, Tara. You can tell us, you know?" Donna asked.

"There's nothing to tell." Tara stated, taking a slice of pizza but not really feeling all that hungry.

"You just acted like my cousin did after her boyfriend beat the shit out of her. I think there's something to tell." Donna pushed.

"If she doesn't trust us enough to talk about it, let it go." Opie shook his head. "Drop it." He turned to Donna when she started to say something else.

Jax had been quiet through the exchange, his fist was balled up under the table and he was mentally killing whatever prick had hurt her.

"It's not that I don't trust you." Tara protested. "I just…" She paused watching the anger flash in Jax's eyes. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to make you upset." She whispered.

His expression softened. "I'm not upset with you." He pulled her hand up to his mouth and kissed it softly. "I'm here whenever you want to talk about it."

She sighed deciding now was as good a time as any. "You sure you want to hear my story? It may ruin your date night." She questioned and they all nodded.

"I had the perfect life up until I was 16. At 16, my parents told me that I was adopted and that my birth parents didn't want me to know about them. They said they didn't want to hide the truth from me anymore. I ran out of the house and hid a few miles down the street. I was upset and couldn't believe that my whole life had basically been a lie. It was raining pretty hard, I was soaking wet after only a few minutes but I was stubborn so I refused to go back. My parents were out looking for me in the car and hydroplaned and slid into a tree. They were killed instantly. I've hated myself since then. If I wouldn't have been so stupid and just let them explain I would have realized it didn't matter who gave birth to me, they were my parents. They were the ones who busted their ass to take care of me for 16 years, they loved me and I loved them. That was all that should have mattered, but I was dumb. I was placed in the foster system since I had no other relatives, the first one I was in had to many kids and not enough food so I was bounced around to a few that was pretty much the same. I ended up in one that was worse than all of the others combined. He was a sex offender, I don't know if I was his first victim but I do know I was his last. He snuck into my bed one night and I had hidden a knife under my pillow. I stabbed him and ran away. When they found me, I gave my story of why I stabbed him and he was arrested and sentenced to prison. I was placed with a lady who made sure I had adequate food and housing and that's where I stayed until Alec. I met Alec a few months after I got to her house. He lived down the street. He was nice at first. We dated for a few months and he asked me to marry him. I stupidly agreed. I kept my address and some stuff at her place in case they inspected. She didn't care as long as she got the check every month that said I was there, but I moved in with him. After that things changed, he became controlling, more so as the time went on. It started out just on simple things like what I would cook or what we would watch on tv but then it turned to other things like not being able to go see my friends unless he was with me. If I didn't do what he said he'd beat me, he'd make sure all of the bruises were able to be covered. He told me if I ever left him, he'd kill me. I believed him. I worked at a market right down the street from the house. When I was scheduled to work, he would come in and check to make sure I was there. He would go with me to get my paychecks and deposit them into an account that I couldn't get money out of. He made sure I needed him for every aspect. He would bring girls home and make me watch him fuck them. If I turned my head, he would hit me. It was getting to the point that he would slap me for nothing, even if I did everything perfectly he would find some reason to punish me. I managed to scrape a little bit of money together through co-worker friends and that's how I got here. I had enough gas to make it from Chicago to here and then I was broke." Tara took a breath, noticing the range of emotions on all of their faces. Pity, anger, sadness, shock.

Jax looked like he could kill someone and if Alec were to walk in right then she had no doubt that he would kill him.

"Wow, I'm so sorry." Donna wiped a tear from her eye. "That's horrible."

"It's okay. I'm here. I managed to turn my life around." Tara smiled and turned to Jax who was still speechless. "Hey?" She tilted her head and looked in his eyes.

"Hey." He mouthed, but no sound actually came out.

"It's okay." She comforted him.

He nodded, and pulled her into his arms for a hug. He held her tightly, his eyes were burning. He had never cried over a girl, but he knew that her backstory had him damn near close. She had endured so much, she was, strong willed and beautiful keeping him on his toes. She was trying to comfort him because of what she lived through. He was amazed at how strong she really was. The more he learned about her, the more he liked her.

"I'm sorry guys, I knew this would ruin date night." She apologized when the whole table was quiet. "I shouldn't have said anything." She sighed.

"Hey. We asked. This didn't ruin anything. It just made me/us understand you a little bit better." Jax objected. "I for one, am glad you told me. If we're ever in Chicago, I may have to look up this Alec asshole and put a bullet in his head."

"I guess it's a good thing you're never in Chicago then because he's not worth it." Tara protested, shaking her head.

"You are worth it." He put his finger over her mouth silencing her when she went to protest again. "Shhh. You are."

"Whatever you say." She rolled her eyes, but felt giddy at all of his kindness and affection.

"We'll be there." Opie hung up the phone. "There's a problem at the clubhouse. They need us. They said bring the girls. We're going on lockdown."

"What kind of problem? What would cause a lock down?" Tara asked, suddenly concerned for all of her new extended family.

"Not sure what happened but a lockdown can be because of anything threat to the club or family. We'll find out more when we get back." Jax explained on the way to his bike. He kept her close to his side, safe from whatever shit they were in now.

"What's going on?" They asked Clay as soon as they dismounted the bike.

"Someone shot at the house, we're thinking Mayans. Until we know for sure what the threat is we're under lockdown. Church in 15 minutes. Girls, help Gemma get everyone settled." Clay ordered.

"Okay." Tara and Donna scurried off to find Gemma. "Gem, what can we help with?" Tara asked.

"Oh good, you're here. I'm glad you're safe. I was so scared when I got the call that shots had been fired at the house." Gemma hugged her tight.

"I'm good, we were out with Jax and Opie." Tara explained.

"Okay, we need to get everyone settled in a room and make sure we have enough food for everyone. Clay and I are in this room. Donna, I'm guessing you and Opie are sharing a room?" Donna nodded. "Okay, so you guys will be in his room. Where am I going to put you?" She asked Tara. "She can be with me." Jax said walking toward them carrying the bags that Gemma had been waiting on. "I'll sleep on the floor." He said, hands raised when Tara smirked at him.

"Well that works then. You were the only one I wasn't sure were to put. All of the others that are here can sleep out in the main room." Gemma stated.

"Aight. I've got to get to church. Here's an extra key to the room, it's this one." He showed her.

"Thanks." She smiled grateful to not have to sleep out there in front of everyone and that he chose to have her in his room rather than one of the nasty girls that's always clinging to him.

"Later." He kissed her forehead.

"Well that's a change?" Gemma mumbled to Donna watching their interaction.

"Yep." Donna smiled. "They're making major progress tonight."

Tara laid in Jax's bed listening to all of the commotion out in the main room. The guys were still in their meeting and she was exhausted. She drifted off to sleep despite all of the noise.

Jax snuck back into the room after church ended. She looked like an angel laying there in his bed, her hair sprawled all over his pillow. He wanted nothing more than to crawl in bed and cuddle with her but he'd keep to his word and sleep on the floor.

He took the extra pillow off the bed and plopped it down onto the floor.

"Hey." She muttered sleepily. "You all know anything else?" She asked.

"Nah, not yet. Get some rest babe." He whispered. He laid down on the floor, groaning quietly at how uncomfortable he was.

"Having problems?" She giggled. He loved to hear her laugh. It seemed to make all of the bad shit in the world fade away at least for a little while.

"Nah just getting comfortable." He answered.

"You'd be more comfortable up here." She stated matter-of-factly.

"Yeah but I promised I'd sleep on the floor."

"Come on, Teller." She patted the bed next to her. He smiled and climbed in beside her. "No funny business." She giggled again and laid her head on his chest snuggling in for the night.

"Much better." He sighed, finally relaxing.

"Goodnight, Jax." She smiled in the darkness.

"Night beautiful." He kissed the top of her head.

Juice's anger was boiling. Not only did she go on a date with Jax after she said she wouldn't date either of them. Now she's sleeping with him too.


	4. Chapter 4

Tara rested her head on Jax's chest listening to his heart beat and his easy breaths. She was frightened after everything that had happened. What if anyone had been home when Gemma's house was shot up? What if they had been hurt or worse? Her stomach clinched at the thought of it.

She eased out of bed to get a glass of milk. She crept out into the main room to the kitchen, tiptoeing to keep from disturbing any of the people sprawled out in random places all over the floor.

"I'm just having a hard time understanding." Juice startled her to spill some of the milk she was pouring out onto the floor.

"Jesus!" She jumped and glared at him. Her hand placed over her heart. "You scared the shit out of me. You don't understand what?"

"Sorry." He muttered. "I don't understand how you can tell me that you're not interested in dating either of us and then I find you on a date with him."

"We weren't on a date, we're just friends." Tara interrupted. They hadn't technically become a couple yet so it was true.

"That's why you're shacked up in his apartment?" Juice scoffed at her. "You normally fuck your friends?" He raised his voice.

"That's enough. Lower your voice." She snapped. "For your information, I haven't fucked anyone since I arrived in Charming. I'm not one of these sluts who gives it up to the first guy who gives her attention but that's none of your business so you need to back the fuck off."

"You don't want me that's fine but just how many women do you think have been fucked in that bed prior to you?" Juice asked.

"We're done here." Tara pushed past him.

"Wait." He grabbed her wrist.

"Juice, I like you but I don't see us being any more than friends." She spoke softer, attempting to calm him. "I don't know if there's a possibility of being more with Jax. I know his history and his tendencies. I want you and I to be friends, please don't make me change my mind on that. Let me go, please. You're hurting me."

"Let her go." Jax growled. "NOW!" Her eyes shot up to Jax's, she hadn't even noticed him standing there.

Tara saw the fear register in Juice's eyes momentarily before he replaced it with a scowl.

"We're just talking bro" Juice offered, releasing Tara from his grasp.

She stepped forward placing her hands on Jax's chest forcing him to look in her eyes. "Let's go back to bed."

"No, this needs to be dealt with." Jax objected.

"Please." She pleaded. "I've seen enough violence, please don't make me see anymore. It's not worth it. I've explained things to him, he understands how I feel now, don't you Juice?" She turned her head to Juice, hoping he'd agree.

He nodded. "She doesn't want me, she wants you. I get it. I'm done. Sorry bro, sorry Tara, I didn't mean to hurt your wrist. I just wanted to explain. You don't want to hear it; I'll leave you alone." His eyes focused back on Jax. He'd had a few sparring matches with him in the past, he wasn't looking forward to going up against him on something like this.

"Please, take me to bed." She whispered, unfurling his fists and interlocking her fingers with his.

Jax's eyes flickered down to hers and back to Juice. "You ever hurt her again, I'll kill you. Brother or not. You ever touch her again without her permission, you'll live to regret it. That's my last warning." Jax roared.

"I got it." Juice held up in his in surrender.

"You better." Jax added before letting Tara pull him back to bed.

She laid there waiting for him to say something but he was quiet, he just held her tight against his body.

She cleared her throat. "So how much of that did you hear?"

"Enough of it." He sighed. "I have a bad history. I use girls as a tool to satisfy my own needs. That's not what I want from you. I want you to know that."

"What do you want from me?" She asked, her voice was shaky. She stared into the darkness, holding her breath waiting on his reply.

"I don't know." He rubbed her hair. "All of this is new to me."

She exhaled. "What's new to you?"

"Wanting more from a girl than just sex." He continued playing with her hair. "When I meet girls, that's what I want. I want them to service me then get the hell out. It's always been that way and I assumed it always would be until you showed up all gorgeous and taking none of my shit." He chuckled.

"Yeah, I definitely don't do that." She laughed with him. "When you decide what you want from me, let me know." She stated, snuggling in closer to him.

She felt his breath hitch. "Be my girlfriend?" He asked, unsure.

"I want you to be certain before you ask me that. As you can tell, I'm not the type of girl that puts up with her man cheating or lying or any of that other bullshit. I've been there, done that. I'm free of that and free to be with someone who will give me the respect I deserve and I hope that's you. Your reputation has me a little worried, I'm not sure you can be a one-woman kind of man." She sighed, there were truth to her words-more truth that she would have liked.

"Give me a chance. That's all I'm asking. If it doesn't work then we can say we gave it our best effort. All I'm asking for is a chance. I promise that there will be no other girls, while we're together." He stated.

"Let me think about it. Okay?" She kissed his chest.

"Okay." He agreed. "I've got church in a few hours so we'll talk about it more tomorrow."

"Okay, goodnight Jax." She rolled over onto her pillow.

"Where do you think you're going?" He asked, wrapping his arm around her waist, pulling her against him. His erection was pushing against her backside. She smiled to herself.

She could hear him snoring softly beside her a few minutes later. She closed her eyes and let sleep take her wrapped in the arms of the man that was slowly tearing down the walls she had built up.

She woke to yelling coming from the main room. She rolled over to see Jax was gone and quickly was concerned about what the yelling was about, hoping it wasn't Juice or Jax related. She jumped out of bed, brushed her fingers through her hair and hurried out there.

"What's going on?" She asked Donna, who was laughing about something.

"Oh look who decided to join the land of the living?" Donna smirked at her. "It's 12:30 in the afternoon." Donna stated after the confused look on Tara's face told her she had no idea what she was talking about.

"What? No way." Tara looked across the room at the clock hanging on the wall. "Hmm. I've not slept that late in a long time." She giggled.

Her eyes focused back on the sound of yelling. "What's going on?" She asked again.

"They're debating how to handle whoever shot up the house." Donna stated. "I just find it funny that everything within SAMCRO is so secret but yet they're screaming for the whole world to hear."

"Well hear anything good?" Tara asked.

"Just that they think it was Mayans that attacked. Nothing else makes sense. Oh and a few things about Juice, You, and Jax." She smirked.

"What are Mayans?" Tara questioned. "Wait what about us?"

"Mayans are a Mexican motorcycle club. Clay told Jax and Juice they needed to focus on the issue at hand rather than fighting over you. I guess someone heard the issue that happened late last night." Donna explained. "Just so you know, Jax really likes you. He's never this protective over a girl. If another member likes a girl that Jax is chilling with, he fucks them and moves on passing that girl to the member. He doesn't care, but it's obvious that's not the case with you since he's been trying to scare Juice away from you since you arrived."

"Yeah." Tara nodded. Donna's words made her feel a little better but his history with girls would always be there, she wasn't sure if she could get past it or not.

The church doors swung open and the guys emerged tired and focused. They had been discussing options for hours and all of them were frustrated.

"Hey." Tara greeted Jax.

"Hey, sleep good?" He asked.

She nodded. "How'd it go? Any leads on who targeted your house?" She questioned.

"Yeah, look I'm going to be out today dealing with all of this so we can get off of lockdown. I just wanted to tell you so you didn't think I was avoiding you." Jax held her hand.

"Is it dangerous?" She asked, she was worried about him. She had a feeling that someone would die for what they did and she found herself hoping it was none of their guys.

"Hey, don't worry okay." He replied. "We'll be fine."

"But is what you're doing dangerous?" She asked again.

"Tara, I can't talk about this." He shook his head.

"I'm not asking you to tell me any details, all I want to know is if you're going to be in danger." She stated matter-of-factly.

"I'll never lie to you, Tara. There will be danger. We'll be fine though." He responded.

"Okay." She sighed, she felt as if she couldn't breathe. She didn't want to imagine him in any sort of danger but she was also learning that danger was a big part of their life.

"I've got to go. I'll see you soon." He kissed her forehead before leaving.

"Jax?" She ran after him, pulling his arm and spinning him back around. "Come back to me safely." She kissed his lips softly and passionately. He wrapped his arms around her waist pulling her closer to him, their tongues dancing together in harmony.

Gemma smiled at them. She knew it was only a matter of time before they stopped fighting their feelings for each other.

"Wrap it up, Romeo we've got to go." Clay slapped Jax on the back as he walked past him.

"I'll be back as soon as I can." He whispered breathless and kissed her quickly.

"Okay." She whispered. "Be safe."

He nodded and winked at her. She saw Juice staring at them, he gave her a small smile and ducked outside.

She sighed and went to help Gemma with whatever chores she had for them to do. Since they were on lock down there was no office work today.

"You think he'll be okay, Gem?" She asked sadly.

"Yes, even more so now." Gemma smirked.

"Why is that?" Tara questioned.

"Cause you just gave him an incentive to get back here whole." Gemma winked at her. "Let's go collect all of the clothes from the rooms and try to get them all washed, they should be empty so you don't have to worry about knocking." Gemma stated to Tara and Donna.

"Yes ma'am." Both girls said in unison.

"Yuck." Tara muttered, grabbing some Kleenex to pick up a used condom laying on the floor and toss it in the trashcan. Some of these rooms were disgusting. She had a feeling if it weren't for Gemma making people clean it, they'd never be clean.

She had spent most of the day cleaning these nasty rooms and was thankful she was almost finished. Jax had texted her that he would be back soon.

She moved onto the next room. There were oxygen tanks in the corner so this room must belong to Piney. She picked up a pair of jeans and a picture fell out of it. She picked it up and placed it on the bedside table, then picked it back up and inspected it. The woman in the photo looked exactly like her. She could be her twin. She read the back. 'To my dearest Piney, I love you so much. -Grace 1977."

Grace. Tara felt a wave of emotion hit her and she felt nauseous. She slid the picture in her back pocket and went to find Gemma.

"Donna, have you seen Gem?" She questioned.

"Yeah, she's outside I think. Everything okay?"

Tara nodded and ran off outside.

"Can I ask you a question?" Tara asked when she got out to the picnic table Gemma was sitting at.

"Of course, sweetheart." Gemma replied.

"Why did you take pity on me like you did giving me a place to stay and the job after you first told me I wasn't right for it?" Tara stared at her.

"I already told you, you've faced so much on your own I thought you needed a helping hand, which you did so what's all this about baby?" Gemma questioned, confused.

"So it was just because you could see I needed help and not because you know my birth parents." Tara dropped the picture down onto the table.

Gemma sighed. "That was part of it." Gemma agreed.

"You knew I was looking for my parents but didn't tell me you already knew who they were." Tara glared at her.

The guys pulled back into the lot. Tara was shaking. She stood and watched them all unmount their bikes waiting on Gemma's response.

"Answer me." Tara shouted, it was louder than she intended. She'd never purposely disrespect Gemma by shouting at her.

"What's going on?" Jax ran up asking her.

"Baby, it wasn't my place to tell you." Gemma spoke quietly.

"Where is she?" Tara questioned, ignoring the eyes that were on her.

"She's dead. She died in childbirth." Gemma's eyes flashed to Piney who was just now realizing what the conversation was about. "She found your picture of Grace."

He nodded, this was not how he wanted this to happen.

Tara was bent over breathing heavily. Jax was rubbing her back. Donna and Opie were standing there checking on her too. "What's going on?" Jax asked Gemma. "Who's Grace?"

"Piney." Gemma said. "I think you need to take this one."

He nodded again. "Tara's mom." His eyes flickered to Opie back to Tara. "I wanted to tell both of you as soon as I was sure but I just didn't know how."

"Tell us what, pop?" Opie asked.

"That I'm Tara's father." His eyes were solely on Tara who seemed unfazed by his admission. Opie on the other hand was standing there with his mouth wide open, in shock.

Tara wiped the tears from her eyes. "Why did you give me away?" She finally asked.

"Your mother wanted more than this life for you. She wanted you to have options, college, a real career. She wanted you to be able to choose something other than being a biker's old lady if you wanted. She didn't want you to feel obligated to stay because it was your legacy like Jax and Opie's legacy would always be to take over SAMCRO. When she died, I didn't know how to raise a little girl. My wife at the time was upset that I had an affair and got another woman pregnant, she was upset that I loved your mom more than her. I couldn't look at you without seeing Grace, so I did the only thing I knew would save you from growing up around an MC and put you up for adoption. I've regretted it every day since but knew I wasn't what you needed." Piney wiped his eyes.

"So you just didn't want me because I wasn't a boy and had no stake in the club?" Tara asked.

"No. I wanted more for you."

"Okay." Tara nodded. "Without your decision to do what you thought was best for me, I never would have gotten the chance to know my parents so thank you, I guess."

Gemma was impressed, she could see the strength it took for her to let go of the anger and betrayal she felt for him giving her away.

"It's nice to finally know." Tara wiped her nose on the tissue in her pocket. "Excuse me." She walked back to the privacy of the room she shared with Jax.

A few minutes later a knock was at the door. "Come in."

Opie appeared on the other side of the door. "Oh, thought you were Jax. I was wondering why he was knocking on his own door."

"I convinced him to let me come talk to you first. He's going crazy out there, waiting to come in." Opie chuckled. "I know this sucks finding out like this, it does for me too. Trust me. I just want you to know, I think it's cool to have you as a sister. I've missed out on the last 18 years but I'll always be here for you now."

She smiled up at him, she had always wanted a brother. "Thanks, bro." She winked.

"You're welcome, little sis." He walked out of the room, letting Jax finally come in.

"Hey. You okay?" He asked, pulling her into his lap.

"Yeah, I think so." She sighed. "I've always wondered who my birth parents were, at least now I know."

"Piney and Opie as official family is pretty cool." Jax rubbed her back. "I didn't know your mom obviously, but I bet if things would have been different we would have grown up together."

"Yeah, if I hadn't killed another mom." She choked up.

"Stop. You can't blame yourself for that, babe." He rocked her back and forth.

"Seems being close to me is deadly." She sighed. "You sure you want me to be your girlfriend?"

"Yes, more than ever. You're not deadly. You've had a run of bad luck since birth, but if I have anything to do with it that will change. Things will get better for you, I'll do everything I can to make your life a good one from here on out." He stated.

"You already have. Just by being here for me, you've made it better." She kissed his neck. "Just promise me, you will never cheat on me. That's a deal breaker for me. I'd prefer you not to lie to me either, but I know somethings within the club I can't know."

"Promise baby. I don't want any other girl but you. I won't lie to you either, if I can't tell you something I won't make up a story about it, I'll just say I can't tell you like I did earlier. No lies, no cheating, no games. I'll be 100% straight-up with you, but I want you to promise me that you'll be the same?" He tilted her chin so she was looking in his eyes.

"Promise." She agreed.

He lowered her onto the bed. "Good." He dropped his mouth onto hers, kissing away all of her pain, doubts, and insecurities.

"Jackie, church!" Chibs pounded on the door.

Jax rolled his eyes. "Perfect timing asshole."

Tara laughed, she could feel Jax's erection pushing against her.

"Tonight." She whispered, rubbing it on through his jeans. "You can put this to good use."

He groaned. "Church can wait; we can put it to good use right now."

"Go crazy, before they send someone in here to get you." She laughed, kissing him before pushing him out the door.

She laid back on the bed processing everything.

"So the princess of samcro huh?" Donna burst in the room, jumping on the bed and lying next to Tara.

"Huh?" Tara raised her eyebrows in confusion.

"You're the daughter of a First 9-Member, that makes you royalty. You're the Princess of Samcro." Donna giggled. "The connection you and Jax have is fate, it all makes sense why he was different with you from the start, and how you didn't take his shit like every other girl did."

"What do you mean fate?" Tara questioned.

"It's fate for the Prince and Princess of SAMCRO to find their way together, to become the future King and Queen of SAMCRO. It was in the cards or stars or whatever for you two to be together. How else do you explain you just magically appear in Charming? Yeah, you liked the name of the town but why did this particular place stand out on the map? It's so damn tiny, I don't even know how you saw it on the map in the first place." Donna replied, nodding at her own reasoning.

Tara laughed. "You're silly, but it makes sense I guess. It makes the decision to date Jax officially a lot better."

"You're together now? Not just that friends bullshit you've been spewing." Donna exclaimed.

"Yep, just made it official before they called church again." Tara smiled.

"OOOHHH that's so exciting." Donna squeaked.

They made their way back into the main room just as the guys were coming out.

"Lockdown is being lifted." Opie told them as he and Jax approached.

"Woohoo." Tara and Donna said in unison.

"So how about I take my new girlfriend out to dinner later?" Jax asked nuzzling against her neck.

"Sounds good, then I'll give you dessert." Tara winked at him.

"FUCK. How about we start with dessert?" Jax smirked, biting her ear lobe.

She licked her lips. "Let's go then."

"It's about damn time you let me back in here." Wendy called out. "I've missed you baby."

"Go away, I'm busy." Jax said grabbing Tara's hand to lead her away.

"Ah, you replaced me already? You know she can't do what I can do." Wendy purred.

Tara spun around on her heels, pulling out of his grip. "Whatever you and Jax had is over. I'm here now. I'm all he can handle, so you sluts are no longer needed. Get out and don't come back." Tara growled.

"Bitch, shut up."

Tara stepped forward and hit her one time before she fell to the floor. Jax wrapped his arm around Tara's waist holding her back.

Wendy got up and dusted herself off, lunging at Tara but Jax stepped in between the two of them.

"You heard my old lady get the fuck out and don't come back around here again."

Wendy stumbled backwards, "Old lady? You made her your old lady?"

"That's right. Now get out and keep your rancid pussy out of my club." Jax growled.

Tara glared in her direction until she left. "Where were we?" Jax whispered in her ear.

"You were about to take me to make me officially your old lady." She smiled.

He picked her up and flipped her over his shoulder. He eased her down on the bed and pulled her clothes off.

He hadn't been this excited to see a naked girl since he was 12 and got to see his first naked girl that wasn't in a magazine.

Tara lay there on the bed, completely exposed to him. Her cheeks were red, he could see that she was being shy trying to cover herself.

"You are beautiful." He pulled her hand away, admiring her body.

He kissed her mouth, her ear, her neck, her chin, making his way down her body. He took his time gently caressing her skin with his fingertips and lips.

He gently eased himself in side of her, before moving faster and harder when she begged for more.

Her moans of pleasure and calling out his name during her orgasm was his undoing. He collapsed down beside her.

She sighed.

"You okay?" He questioned.

"Yes. I'm great." She grinned up at him. "I wasn't expecting you to take so much extra time with all of the other stuff but it was amazing, all of it." She admitted.

"I'm all about the service baby." He smiled down at her. "I wanted you to know it was more than just a fuck to me, it meant more. With you it will always mean more."

She nodded. "I could tell. It means more to me too."


	5. Chapter 5

Tara crept out of bed the next morning before the sun came up. She couldn't sleep any longer, she was drenched in sweat. They AC must have stopped working sometime through the night.

She sat outside the clubhouse and watched the sun come up, just enjoying the peace and quiet. Since the lockdown had been lifted the clubhouse went back to being Party Central so the quiet now was refreshing.

"What's on your mind, kiddo?" Piney asked sitting down beside her. She hadn't even heard him come outside.

"Nothing really, just enjoying the fresh air." She stated. "What are you doing up so early?"

"I like to get up early, it's peaceful." He stared out into the empty lot.

Tara nodded. "Yep."

"I'm sorry you found out like you did." Piney dropped his head. "I wanted it to be a lot different."

"It's okay, no worries." Tara smiled. "I wouldn't have known how to tell someone something like that either."

"I've been a fuckup for most of my life, kid. I've made bad decisions left and right, but I need to know did I make the right one when I let you go and gave you up? Did you have a good life? He gazed at her, hoping for confirmation.

She sighed, "Yes. I think you made the right call. My parents, the ones that raised me were amazing. They made sure I had the best of everything, every opportunity available. When they died, it got a little sketchy but I'm back on track." She said enough to assure him without going in to any detail about her dark days.

"Sketchy? Did you get in some kind of trouble? I've been wondering how you ended up here if you didn't know who I was."

She took a breath. "No trouble. I just needed a change from a bad relationship. I knew my birth parents were from California but didn't know where. I looked at a map, saw Charming, liked the name and here I am. Who knew that's where my parents were from?" She stood up and walked back inside, leaving him to ponder her words.

"Hey, are you going to sleep all day?" Tara whispered into Jax's ear.

"I thought about staying in bed all day, naked with you." He grinned, eyes still closed.

"That could be fun…. but I'd rather do that in a bed not inside the clubhouse that's full of people like my dad and brother." She kissed the tip of his nose.

Jax's eyes flashed open. "That still sounds weird. Opie's your brother." He shook his head in disbelief. "Didn't see that coming."

"Me either," She giggled. "but what better person to have as a brother than Opie? I guess we're lucky it didn't end up being you that was my brother." She wrinkled her nose at the thought.

"Good point." He cringed. "You would make an awful sister."

"AHH! Asshole. Why do you say that?" She playfully smacked him.

"Easy now," He laughed, grabbing her hands and flipping her over underneath him. "You would be an awful sister because you'd have my dick so damn hard all the time like you have since the moment I saw you and if you were my sister I couldn't do anything about it."

"I'm pretty sure that the fact of knowing I was your sister would kill your erection issues." She narrowed her eyes at him, grinning from ear to ear.

"That's my point. You'd break my dick. Let's stop talking about that and get to talking more about you riding my dick." He smirked.

She slid her sweat pants off and eased onto his erection. "Like this?" She grinned.

"Mmhmm, just like that." He guided her hips.

"Oh, not like this." She moved faster, slamming down onto him.

"FUCK!" He moaned out. "Like that. That's better."

"So you don't want it like this then?" She slowed back down, slowly moving her hips.

"ARGGHHH! You're killing me woman." He flipped her over. Pounding himself inside of her.

"Ahhh took you long enough." She laughed, finally getting what she wanted.

"Oh that's what you wanted, me to do this." He slammed hard repeatedly. She screamed out his name, reaching her orgasm.

He reached his moments after her.

"You're such a tease." He tickled her.

"That's one of the things you like most about me." She smirked.

"Not most. I like it, yes but it's not what I like most." He objected.

"So what do you like most then?" She questioned.

"Your smokin' hot body." He had a smile playing on his lips.

"Only want me for my looks huh?" She narrowed her eyes.

"Kidding." He chuckled. "My favorite things are your smart, funny, beautiful, good in bed," He winked. "You're sweet, you have a good heart, you ain't afraid to call me out on my shit, and that you're a tease."

"That's a pretty good list, Teller." She sighed. "The way I see it though, one of those things need improvement."

"What's that?" He asked.

"Being good in bed. I need lots of practice." She smirked.

"Yes ma'am." He attacked her.

She giggled when she noticed the clock said it was 2:30, he had got his wish to stay in bed all day with her naked. She was actually surprised that no one had come knocking but she assumed they could hear what was going on so there was no need to interrupt. She also had a feeling that everyone there with the exception of Juice and maybe Piney were rooting for her and Jax to work out.

"What's so funny?" He asked.

"Just that you managed to get your wish and have me in here naked with you all day, well most of it."

"I'm a man that knows what he wants." He stated, standing up to get dressed.

"You just got lucky." She rolled her eyes.

"I did." He agreed. "The moment you walked into my life and you turned my world upside down. I was the luckiest man alive."

She placed her hand over her heart. "Awww. That was a pretty good line, Teller."

"Line? That wasn't a line. Woman, that was the truth!" He chased her around the room, throwing her off his shoulder swatting her on the butt.

"Okay, Okay it was the truth. Put me down." She fought to free herself, laughing hysterically.

"What the hell Is going on?" Gemma hollered through the door.

"Shh." Jax chuckled. "Nothing, Ma." He said as he opened the door with Tara still in his arms.

"Uh-huh." Gemma smirked, shaking her head. She turned around without another word.

The smell of lunch was coming through the hallway and Tara's mouth watered. They had skipped breakfast so she was famished.

"Well Well, look who decided to grace us with their presence." Donna grinned.

"Yeah, it was a long night we were tired." Jax stated.

"I bet you were from all that fucking, brother. What was it? 5 or 6 times?" Tig asked more seriously than Tara would have expected.

Her face was blood-red, but Jax just nodded. "Something like that." He tickled her.

"Stop it. Stop." She laughed, pulling away from him. Her eyes flickered to Juice who excused himself before he had eaten. She felt bad for him, but not bad enough to break things off with Jax.

"I thought so." Tig stated.

"Shut it, Tiggy." Tara giggled, surprised by how little this bothered her especially since Piney and Opie were at the table.

"How about we not talk about sex at the table?" Piney spoke up.

"I'm with Piney." Tara answered. "How about we not talk about my sex life at all, please and thank you." She grinned, flipping Tig the bird.

Tara finished her lunch and stared around at all of the faces at the table, they had quickly become her family, some of them actually were her family.

"Ever think about calling me dad or pop?" Piney asked. She was able to see something had been weighing on his mind but wasn't sure what until he said that.

She sighed. "I'm sorry but you haven't earned that. You are my biological father, but you gave up that right. Although, I don't hold any grudges against you, I can't just call you dad either. My dad died when I was 16." She scooted her chair back and excused herself.

She saw the hurt in Piney's eyes, but she's been hurt for 2 and a half years. She wasn't mad and wanted a relationship with him but it wouldn't happen overnight just because they shared the same DNA.

"Hey sis." Opie greeted her, lighting up his cigarette.

"Hey big-brother." She grinned. "What's up?"

"I wanted to ask you something. Why have you fully accepted me as your brother but won't accept the old man?" He offered her the smoke out of his habit of passing one back and forth with Jax but she declined.

"It's not that I haven't accepted him. I have. He's my dad, biologically. I'm struggling with the fact that he gave me away, that's true. You, were just a baby when I was born. You had no say in the matter, hell you didn't even know about me. I knew about you before you knew about me. So I don't blame you at all. I've always wanted a brother or sister." She said honestly, biting her lip.

"I get that. I want you to know he regrets the way things happened. He's stubborn and he doesn't have a way with words but I can see the regret he has over you. I'd guess that things would be different if he could go back in time." Opie bumped her gently with his shoulder.

"I know. It'll take time though." She sighed. "Hey babe." She greeted Jax as he walked out to where they were sitting.

He wrapped his arm around her. "Anyways, like I was saying, it'll take time. As much as I try to let go of this sense of abandonment by him it didn't just disappear. It's still there and I'm actively battling it but I try not to let it show. I don't want to make it any harder on him-or make him feel even more guilty." She wiped the sweat off of her forehead.

"I get that. Don't' sugar coat things. Don't let them build and build until you explode. You can always talk to me and you already know you can always talk to Jax. We've got your back no matter what. You're his old lady, and my kid-sister so you never have to worry about being abandoned again." Opie stated.

Jax nodded. "He's right. Your stuck with us babe."

"That's a good thing since I wasn't going to give you the option to up and leave me." She grinned.

"Not a chance." Jax brought her mouth to his.

"Alright boys, I'm going to go help Gemma clean up. I'll see you in a little bit." She strolled off.

"Wow, I can't believe she's your sister." Jax stated. "Piney or your mom never mentioned her before?"

"Nope." Opie shook his head. "It makes me want to kick that fuckers ass back in Chicago even more though."

"If he ever shows up anywhere around here you can count on it." Jax agreed.

"What about you and her man? Did you really make her your old lady this soon?" Opie questioned.

"You have a problem with that?" Jax asked. "We haven't talked about her getting the crow or anything but yeah, I did."

"No not a problem unless you hurt her, then we'll have a problem." Opie warned, embracing big brotherhood fully.

"You don't have anything to worry about. She makes me wanna be different." Jax admitted.

"I can see that. Just treat her right." Opie stated.

Jax nodded. He would never dream of doing anything to purposely hurt her.

Jax went off on an errand while Tara helped Gemma.

"So I was thinking about what you said," Jax said. "I think we should get our own place together."

Tara spun around to see if he was serious. "You want us to move into our own apartment?"

He nodded. "What do you think?" He questioned.

"I think that's a really big step. We need to be sure this is going to work first." She said, always being the rational one.

"I thought you wanted this." He stepped back, surprised she wasn't as excited about it as he was.

"I do, but I don't want to jump into anything before we see how things are going to go, first. We already live together at Gemma's so what's the rush?" She asked.

His temper was flaring, although he tried to reign it in. "I guess I'll move by myself then." He stormed off.

She stared after him, not understanding what had just happened. She shook her head, sighing.

She went to find him to try to calm the situation.

"What's going on? Why are you mad?" She asked after Opie told her he was up on the roof.

"I'm not." He pouted.

"You are. You're pouting so why don't you stop being a baby and tell me what's wrong." She pushed.

"You're what's wrong. You tell me that you want to be with me and you tell me that you want more privacy so I go out and buy a house for us to live in and you say you don't want to move in with me. You want to wait and see how things work out." He snapped.

She stood in shock, mouth wide open. "You bought a house? For us?" She asked.

He didn't say anything.

"Why didn't you just tell me you already bought something? Better yet, why didn't you talk to me first? Buying a house is a big decision and if it was for us, don't you think I should have been a part of that decision? If we're a team, then you have to include me on important decisions." She held his hand.

"It was supposed to be a surprise. It's okay—you don't want to live there, I'll move in by myself. You can stay at Gemma's."

"You're being such a baby." She frowned.

"No, I'm being realistic. I tried doing something nice for my old lady, get her and us some privacy and she gives me lame excuses but taking things slow. I think we're done past the slow mark, don't you darlin?" He glared at her.

"Okay, you know what… how about you come talk to me when you're not acting like you're five years old. Maybe then you'll stop pouting long enough to see my point and then maybe you can show me the house." She rolled her eyes when he didn't say anything else. She climbed back down the ladder.

"Men!" She muttered under her breath.

"So this is what you do? You shut down when we have a disagreement? You want me to even consider moving in with you when you avoid me over something like this!" She hissed at him, after he had ignored her texts asking where he had gone for the past few hours.

"You've made it clear you weren't moving in with me. You've made it clear you didn't want to be my old lady." He slurred.

"So you were out drinking, I see. Did you manage to drink alone or did you end up in some whore's pussy while you were out?" She roared.

He laughed.

"You see that right there is why I had doubts about moving in with you so soon. I don't do one thing on your time and you're calling it quits. I should have known fucking better." She shouted.

"So I should." He slurred.

"That didn't even make sense." She rolled her eyes, holding back the tears.

"I should have known better too. You were just using me for sex. You didn't want to be my lady, you just wanted the dick." He passed out onto the couch.

His phone buzzed. Tara fished it out of his pocket. It was a text from Wendy. " _thanks for the fuck, sweetie love ur new place, cant wait to see u 2morrow. dream of my lips wrapped around ur cock"_

She stared at him for a long time, wiping the tears from her eyes.

"No, you're wrong. I could have seen myself being with you for the rest of my life. I could have loved you forever. I had already started falling in love with you, but you had to ruin that with this. I was trying to find you to tell you that I was sorry, that I did want to move in with you but now after this, I don't even know how I am going to look at you again." She climbed the stairs to her room, locking the door behind her. She fell on her bed crying into her pillow. How had things turned so bad so quick? They were so happy this morning.

She tossed and turned all night unable to get the text out of her head. She hated him right now. She wasn't sure if she'd ever be able to forgive him for this. It hadn't even been two whole days since they officially became a couple, two whole days since he promised he'd never want anyone but her. Two whole days since she told him cheating was a deal-breaker.

She would make him pay for this. Usually she wasn't spiteful, but he had pushed her too far. He made her look stupid and she wanted him to feel her pain.

She jumped up, digging through her drawer at home. She pulled out the card with Dean's number on it out, looking at it. She laid it on her night stand deciding to give him a call the next day.

She ate breakfast with Gemma, Clay had left for a run with Bobby and Tig sometime through the night. Jax was still passed out on the couch.

"Everything okay with you two?" Gemma asked, noticing her red-rimmed eyes.

Tara sniffled. "No."

"You want to talk about it?" Gemma questioned, pouring another cup of coffee.

"Nothing to talk about." Tara shook her head, tears building up again.

"Tara…" Gemma pushed.

"He went out and bought us a house without telling me so when he asked if I wanted to move in with him, I said I wanted to take things slow and see how it all worked out first. I didn't know he had already got the place, if I did I would have just agreed to move in. I told him he should have made that decision with me, not make it and expect me to be okay with it. He got mad left, got drunk, slept with a whore in the house he bought for us so there is no us." Tara blurted out.

Gemma sighed, "My son the hothead. I'm so sorry baby."

"I can't just let it go and forgive that, Gem. I know he was mad but that's not an excuse. I told him cheating was a deal breaker, he promised and not even 2 days later he's in bed with someone else." Tara cried. "I hate him for making me feel this way."

"Shh." Gemma held her, letting her cry on her shoulder. "It's going to be okay." She rubbed her back, soothing her.

"I'm okay. I think I'm going to head to the office now." Tara pulled away.

"You can have the day off." Gemma objected. "You're not in any shape to go in this morning."

"I'm fine. I'll go in for at least half a day anyways." Tara wiped her eyes one more time and walked out the door.

Gemma shook her head. She could whip her son's ass for hurting Tara like that. He was always thinking with his dick instead of his heart or the head on his shoulders.

"Get up." Gemma yelled at him. "It's time for work."

"Ma, stop shouting. My head is killing me." He said sitting up, grabbing his head.

"Serves you right, asshole." She hissed at him.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" Usually she was kind and caring, right now his mom acted like she didn't really like him.

"You not being able to keep your dick in your pants or with Tara where it belongs is what's wrong with me." She glared at him.

Confusion swept over him. "What are you talking about?"

"You don't know? Too drunk to remember your extracurricular activities with Wendy the Gash?" Gemma spat.

The night before flooded his mind. "Shit. She knows?"

"She knows." Gemma confirmed. "Your gash sent you a sweet little text that told her all about it. You fucked up baby, you fucked up bad."

He flipped out his phone and read the text from Wendy. "FUCK!" He shouted. "I've got to talk to her."

Gemma nodded but knew it wouldn't do any good. Tara would not listen to a single word he had to say right now, if ever.

"Babe?" Jax came barreling into the office.

Tara was there but she didn't acknowledge him.

"Babe, please let me explain." He begged.

She didn't say anything, she went right on filling out the paper in front of her.

"Babe!" He shouted, his voice was cracking and shaky. "Please talk to me."

"Get out." She hissed, not sparing him a glance.

"No, not until you listen." He paused.

"There's nothing you can say, Jackson. You made your choice. We're over. At this point, we're not even friends so like I said, GET OUT!" She interrupted him.

"It was a mistake, I was drunk. She didn't mean anything." He pleaded.

Tara didn't say anything else. She pretended he wasn't there.

"Go on son, get to work." Gemma nudged him out the door. "You messed up. You're going to have to give her time."

Jax nodded sadly, looking through the window at Tara but only seeing the top of her head.

Jax worked in the bay that was facing the office all day, refusing to give it up no matter who's turn it was to work on the next car in there. He wanted to stay where he could see her or at least part of her, even if it was just the top of her head.

A familiar car rolled into the lot. Jax eyed it and puffed his chest out. He remembered this fucker.

Tara strolled out of the office with a smile pasted on her face. "Dean! How are you?" She called out.

"I'm good now. How are you? You ready to go?" He asked her.

Jax's blood was boiling. He threw down his grease rag and stalked out of the garage.

"Easy son." Piney put a hand out stopping him. He watched Tara get into that fucker's car. His pulse was racing, adrenaline pumping.

Her eyes flashed to Jax's momentarily warning him to stay away before giving Dean her full attention before they drove out of sight.

Jax dropped down to his knees making his pain visible to everyone at the lot, not caring how much of a pussy he was at that moment. He had fucked up the one good thing he had going for him. He had fallen for her, yet he let his pride get in the way and ruined what they had. He had to find a way to make her forgive him, he would do whatever it took to earn her forgiveness and win back her trust and her love. He had to. He couldn't give up the only girl that he could see himself loving-the only girl he did love, if he was being honest with himself.

Tara had actually enjoyed her time with Dean. He was training to be a Paramedic, that fascinated her. He was polite, gorgeous, and very sweet. She liked him. Her plan to make Jax jealous wouldn't be so difficult with Dean and she may actually find herself moving on from the massive amount of pain he had caused her in just a short period of time. She had to try and Dean was definitely worth the time and effort it took to try.


	6. Chapter 6

_**Hey guys, thanks for reading. I appreciate all of your reviews! Sorry that this chapter is a short one but I've been extremely busy all weekend and wanted to get something out to you.**_

 _ **Also, I'm still planning to continue the other stories. I'm hoping to have an update on them as soon as possible, maybe in the next week or so.**_

"Do you have any plans to attend college?" Dean asked.

"I did all through school. I loved school. I graduated with a 4.0." Tara smiled, still proud of herself that even with all of the chaos in her life she never let her grades suffer. School was her escape from reality.

"You don't plan to now?" He questioned, staring intently at her.

"I want to but life happened and I missed my deadlines for the scholarships so now I can't afford it." Tara sighed. She had given up everything to keep Alec from knowing where she was, even the scholarship that she had been offered.

"I'm sure you could get some kind of financial aid. You seem like a very smart girl Tara; you should at least try." He gave her an apologetic smile. "Sorry. I can be a little outspoken sometimes."

"That's okay." She smiled. "Maybe I'll look into it."

"Yeah? What are you interested in?"

"Well when I was younger I wanted to be a surgeon. Now, I think I'd be happy with becoming a nurse, like my mom." She answered.

"Well forgive me for being outspoken again but I think you should go for it. Oakland has a pretty good school for nursing, my sister went there." He pushed.

"I'll look into it." She stated. "Thanks for the info."

When they arrived back at TM, he climbed out of the car and opened her door for her.

"Thank you." Tara grinned. "I had a great time."

"My pleasure." He bowed down and Tara giggled. "If you're interested I'd like to take you out again sometime."

"Yeah, definitely. You have my number just give me a call." She nodded, shielding the sun from her eyes.

"I'll do that. I'll see you later then." He stepped in and gave her a small hug, before getting into his car and pulling away.

When she turned around her eyes met Jax's, he was standing frozen in place by his bike watching her. The pain in his eyes still visible.

She turned away from him shaking her head.

"How was lunch?" Gemma met her outside the office door.

"It was good. Thanks. How were things here?" She asked, fishing for information on how Jax took her leaving with another man. By the look in his eyes she knew he didn't take it well.

"About as well as expected. He's regretting his actions." Gemma answered.

"That doesn't make them go away." Tara interrupted.

"I know. I'm not defending him. I'm just saying he's sorry." Gemma held up her hands placing them on Tara's shoulders. "You have every right to be pissed."

"Damn right I do." Tara huffed. "He expected me to move in with him after only two days and then cheated on me because I hesitated-apparently for good reason given the events that unfolded after ONE disagreement."

"He's like his father. John asked me to marry him after an hour, he said he knew I was the one. A few days later we were here starting the journey of a lifetime. He knew what he wanted and went after it. I can't fault him for that. Jax was a baby and reacted badly when it didn't go as he planned. I'll give you that." Gemma admitted.

"That's the understatement of the year." Tara scoffed, rolling her eyes.

Gemma smirked, Tara was so much like Grace it still amazed her. She hadn't spent any time with her outside of the womb before Grace's life was cut short but she had her attitude, there was no doubt about that.

"You do what you have to do baby. Jax deserves all of the punishment you throw at him." Gemma rubbed Tara's back before sitting down at her desk.

"I'm not trying to punish him. We just can't be together. There's no way I can look at him and not remember what he did and why he did it. I'm just glad I found out now before I got to attached. I don't want to cause any problems though; I'm saving up my money to rent a place of my own." Tara replied.

"Baby-girl, I don't want you to feel like you need to go anywhere. If Jax ain't happy with the current situation, then he can move into that brand new house that he just had to have. You are always welcome to stay there. You are family, too." Gemma stated.

Tara wasn't sure what to say. She had expected things to end up bad after the break-up. Jax and Gemma were so close, Tara had naturally expected Gemma to side with him.

"Thanks. That will help me out a lot. I'm going to apply to a nursing school in Oakland so I'm trying to save up what money I can for that." Tara admitted.

"You're leaving Charming?" Gemma asked, shocked.

"I'm going to try to get a job at Saint Thomas afterward so I can stay near you guys. I don't want to leave you after I've found my birth family, I'm still deciding. I probably won't even get in so it won't matter anyways." Tara sighed.

"You're smart, you'll get in. They'd be dumb not to take you." Gemma said, proudly.

"We'll see, I guess." Tara sighed.

Tara and Gemma spent the rest of the day talking about college, Dean, Jax, and everything in between. She loved having Gemma to talk to. She hadn't felt a connection with anyone since her parents died so it eased some of the pain having a mother figure around.

They closed the office up and SAMCRO had another party starting. Tara was actually looking forward to the distraction of a party.

"Can we talk?" Jax asked, leaning over her left shoulder.

"There's nothing to say." She sighed.

"Just give me five minutes, please." He pleaded.

She nodded and went with him outside after refusing to go into his room.

"Five minutes." She urged looking down at her watch.

"I'm sorry. It was an accident."

"An accident, seriously, that's what you're going with?! You're not seriously going to tell me she slipped, fell, and landed on your dick are you?" Tara interrupted him.

"No of course not. I didn't mean for it to happen. That's what I mean. It was an accident." He stated, sadly.

"NO! A car wreck, that's an accident. Fucking someone out of anger is not an accident Jackson, it's revenge. You may not have meant for it to happen; the booze may have played a part in it but that doesn't matter. What matters is, you were pissed off because I didn't want to move in with you after two days of dating. I didn't want things to become that serious that quickly. You didn't even give us time to see if we would even work out. You didn't care what I wanted. All you cared about was you and when shit got tough the first thing you do is run out get boozed up and fuck a bitch instead of staying at home and working things out with me. That was no accident, it was a choice. You made your choice and now I'm making mine. You fucked me over after only two days so now I'm done with you. I'm moving on, so should you. Oh, speaking of I saw the bitch that you cheated on me with walk in so run along, she's all yours and we're through here so have a nice life, Jax. I wish you the best. I really do. I hope you find whatever it is you're looking for." She turned away, ignoring his pleas for her to listen and forgive him.

"Everything okay here?" Opie asked, hearing the last part of her shouting.

"Yeah, it's all good-just tying up loose ends." She answered.

Opie nodded, walking past her to Jax.

"You gonna tell me what the hell that was about?" Opie glared at him, he heard most of it but he was just waiting on confirmation.

"Nothing." Jax shook his head, watching her weave through the crowd of people. He wiped a tear from his eye.

Opie had never seen his brother cry over a girl, he could break Jax's face for hurting his sister and he wanted to so bad but he could see that Jax was already beating himself to death over this.

"I fucked up, Op. I let my anger and pride ruin everything." Jax admitted, sinking down to the ground.

"I should kick your ass for what you did to her, but you're doing a good job of that on your own." Opie pulled him to his feet. "You've got to move on bro, let her go."

"I don't know if I can do that." Jax objected.

"You have to." Opie stated handing him a beer. "Drink this, jump into some pussy. In a few days you'll be over this."

Jax nodded, not wanting to look like a pussy any more than he already did. He took the beer and chugged it and then another after another. He was hammered by the time he saw Tara again dancing with the fucker that picked her up earlier.

"Moooooove on soooooo soooooooon?" Jax slurred.

Tara rolled her eyes. "Sleep it off, Jax."

"Can't do that darlin." He objected.

"Suit yourself." Tara shrugged, pulling Dean in the opposite direction.

"Where ya going?" Jax followed. "The party's just getting started."

"What's your problem, man?" Dean turned on his heels, standing in Jax's face.

"You. Dancing. With. My. Girl." Jax spat, nostrils flaring-fists balled up at his side.

"I'm not your girl, Jax. You made sure of that. Let's go, Dean." Tara urged.

"You are." Jax protested, grabbing her hand.

"Back off." Dean shoved Jax backwards. Jax lunged forward decking him in the mouth. His balance unsteady but his aim precise.

The two of them were in a brawl, everyone was gathered around watching cheering their Vice President on. Tara was shrieking for them to stop but neither listening.

Opie and Piney stepped in breaking the fight up.

"Easy bro." Opie held Jax in his vice-grip.

"Get the fuck off me man, this fucker has it coming." Jax fought against Opie's grasp.

"Calm down, Jackson." Gemma stepped in front of him. "If you're trying to win her back, this ain't the way to do it. You're only pushing her farther away. If you don't back off, she's going to move away and none of us will ever see her again." She had her hands on his shoulders, forcing him to look at her.

Jax stopped fighting at her words.

"She ran from her last boyfriend, don't make her run from here too." Gemma whispered.

Jax stared at Tara wiping the blood off of Dean's lip. He wished it was his lip underneath her fingers, he wished he could turn back the clock and redo everything. He wished she would look at him the way she had yesterday morning.

She locked eyes with him only for a moment shooting him an evil look, not the look of someone who still wanted him, not the look he wanted to see.

He watched her leave with Dean, he had an aching in his chest. He wanted to follow her and pull her into his arms and kiss her until she forgave him but he wouldn't. Gemma was right, if he pushed her she would run and then he'd never have the chance to win her back.

"I'm so sorry." Tara apologized when they got into his car. "I shouldn't have invited you here."

"Well that was crazy, but it's okay." Dean replied, wiping some more blood off of his face.

"It's not okay. I'm really sorry." Tara sighed, she was waiting for him to end things with her before they even got started.

"Hey." He lifted up her chin. "I can take a punch." He winked.

"I see that." She smiled.

"Are you going to fill me in on what that was about?" He asked.

"Here's the short story. We were dating, he got mad about something stupid, got drunk and cheated on me, I ended things, which led us to this." She rubbed her fingers lightly over the cut on his face.

"I see." He nodded.

"I understand if my life is to complicated and you wanna bail." Her face fell again.

"What? I'm not bailing. In fact, I was going to ask you if you'd want to come to my place for dinner tomorrow night? I'll cook." He asked.

"Really?" She was stunned, she had fully expected him to call it quits after Jax pulled that stunt.

"Really." He nodded.

"Okay, I'd like that." She agreed.

"Okay, good. I'll pick you up around 8:00?"

"I'll be ready." She kissed his cheek and climbed out of his car.

She laid on her bed, this day had been exhausting. Arguing with Jax took a lot out of her, she hated seeing him in pain but what could she do. He brought this pain on himself.

 **TWO MONTHS LATER**

Things had gone better than she had expected them to over the last couple of months. Tara had gotten her accepted to start nursing school, she would start in a few weeks.

Things with Dean had been going great, he was so sweet and faithful unlike Jax had been. She was truly happy with him. He was the kind of guy to open doors, pull out chairs for her, and bring her flowers just because he was thinking of her. He never made her feel jealous of other girls.

Jax had spiraled out of control, seeing Tara moving on so easily had broken him. He was drunk or high more than not, he was with a different girl every night. He had jumped even deeper into the club, doing the dirty work, putting himself in danger at every turn. He even had Clay worried about him. At first Clay was thrilled to see him so dedicated to the club but was beginning to think Jax had a death-wish.

Tara watched Clay and Gemma talk in a frantic whisper outside of the office. She was curious to know what was going on but didn't want to intrude. Gemma came into the office with tears streaming down her cheeks.

"Gem, what's wrong?" Tara jumped up to try to comfort her.

"Nothing. I'm fine." Gemma shook her head, placing her head in her hands.

"You can tell me, you know." Tara pressed, rubbing Gemma's back.

"I'm just worried about Jax. I saw that he was out of control but I figured he'd get over it after awhile. He's not, he's only getting worse. Clay said he keeps putting himself right in the line of fire likes he's trying to get himself killed. I didn't know it had gotten this bad, I hadn't even tried to help him." Gemma sobbed, blaming herself.

Tara sat back in the chair shocked. She had no idea Jax had been this bad. She knew he was drunk a lot and sleeping with various women but that was his normal.

"I'll talk to him." Tara announced, not having a clue as to what she was going to say but she had to try.

"You don't have to do that. I'll talk to him." Gemma objected.

"No, this is because of me. It's okay. I can talk to him. I think I can help." Tara sighed. She hoped she could anyways.

She strolled off to find him.

"Op, do you know where Jax is? I need to talk to him." She asked.

"Up there." Opie pointed, giving her a small nod, grateful that she was taking the time to try to help despite everything.

"Hey, mind if I come up?" She asked Jax.

He shrugged. She climbed up and sat beside him.

"What's going on?" She questioned.

"What'd ya mean?" She could smell the alcohol on his breath already, it was barely 11:00 am.

"What's going on with you? You're different." She stated.

"Nope, I'm still an asshole." He smirked.

She sighed, this wasn't going well. She was going to have to make more of an effort.

"You don't have to be. I miss being able to talk to you." She admitted. "I want us to get past this and be friends."

"I don't think I can just be your friend, Tara. We've never been able to just be friends." He shook his head, downing the rest of his drink.

"Can we try, please? I miss you." She pleaded.

"I miss you too." He agreed. "More than you know."

"I have a pretty good idea." She stated. "You need to quit drinking so much and stop putting yourself in danger."

His head snapped up, "That's what this is about? You heard about that?"

"I did hear about it, but that's not why I'm up here. I've been wanting to talk to you since before your last run but couldn't ever catch you sober enough to talk. I care about you, Jax, that hasn't changed and as mad as I was at you I never wanted to see you hurt so please be careful. Don't make me lose another person that I care for." She begged.

"Don't worry. I'll be fine, I always am."

"Jax, please. Promise me that you'll take care of yourself." She bit her lip and took a deep breath. "If you're dead there won't ever be a chance for us to get past this and be together."

His eyes lit up, there was a flicker of hope and life back in them. She felt horrible for getting his hopes up but if it saved his life then she could live with that guilt. She couldn't live with something happening to him because of her.

"You mean it? There's a chance you'll take me back?" He questioned, excitement clear in his voice.

"Never say Never." She smiled.

"I'll take that, it's more than I've gotten in the last few months. It's a start." He added.

"A step in the right direction. Keep yourself safe." She climbed down the ladder.

"What about Dean?" He called down to her.

"Just take care of you and we'll see how things go." She turned and closed her eyes shut tightly. Did she plan on taking Jax back? No. The chances of them ever getting back together were slim to none but she would let him think there was a chance if it meant he was safe. She knew he'd eventually question it and she'd cross that bridge when she got to it. As far as he was concerned, right now they're friends with the possibility of more later on. To her, she's saving him from himself.

Dean definitely wouldn't like this new outcome with Jax, he wasn't particularly fond of him but she'd deal with that later too.

She knew this was all going to come back to haunt her later on, that was inevitable but she wouldn't regret any of it if it meant saving him from a breakdown, she still cared about him after all. She had a feeling that wasn't ever going to change.


	7. Chapter 7

It had only been a day since Tara reached out to Jax and made an attempt at friendship. She could already tell there was a vast improvement, it was after 5 pm and he'd been sober all day working in the garage.

"He looks a lot better." Gemma stood staring out the window at her son.

"I think so, too." Tara agreed.

"You have something to do with that?" Gemma asked, she could see a light back in his eyes that had been distinguished when Tara cut ties with him.

"Not really. I just told him I needed him to straighten up, I couldn't lose someone else I cared about." Tara stood next to Gemma, watching Jax slide out from underneath the Silverado that had been brought in earlier.

"Telling him you still care probably saved his life baby." Gemma whispered, "Thank you." Tears fell from her eyes, "I thought I was going to lose him."

"We won't let that happen." Tara sighed a realization from Gemma's tears at just how bad things had spiraled out of control. She had ignored him for the most part so she only knew some of it, some of the stuff that she had heard around the shop and from Gemma.

"No, we won't." Gemma agreed.

Tara stepped outside to talk to him. "Get it done?" She asked, floundering for something to talk about.

"Yep." Jax nodded. "You wanna get some dinner-as friends?"

Tara was unsure of what to do. She had plans for dinner with Dean but Jax was so vulnerable right now, she didn't want to set him off and be the reason he jumped back into his destructive behavior.

"Um. Sure. I guess we can do that." She brought blood to her lip, she hadn't even realized she had been biting it.

"Cool. Let me take a shower and then we can head out." He rushed into the clubhouse.

"Great." Tara muttered. She sat back down in her chair in the office and called Dean. Her cell battery had died so she had to use the office phone.

" _Hey babe, I've got some bad news." Tara murmured. "I'm going to have to cancel our date tonight, some repo's came in and it looks like I'm going to be here for longer than planned. I'm really sorry."_

Gemma spun around smirking as Tara hung up the phone. "Repo's huh?"

Tara shrugged, "Jax asked me to dinner and I didn't want to disappoint him and cause any more damage and I already had plans so if he calls back later, cover for me?"

"You got it baby." Gemma grinned.

"You ready?" Jax poked his head into the office.

"Yep. Where we going?" Tara questioned, pulling her jacket on. "Wow, no kutte?"

"It's a surprise." Jax grinned "No kutte, I thought we'd have a nice dinner tonight. Later, Ma." He nodded toward Gemma.

She strapped the helmet to her head, feeling excited to be riding again. She hadn't been on a bike since everything happened and she honestly missed it.

They passed the Leaving Charming sign and Tara was curious to see where he was taking her.

They pulled up in front of a fancy looking restaurant in Lodi, she had been expecting a pizza or burger from the café, definitely not this.

"Reservations for Jax Teller." He spoke to the host by the door.

"Certainly right this way, sir." The host pulled out two menus and led them to a table.

"Wow. How did you manage to get reservations so quickly? This place usually is booked up months in advance." Tara questioned, sliding out of her jacket and placing it on the back of her chair.

"Well I've had them for a while. I made them the day that everything fell apart." He admitted, looking defeated. "It was just a coincidence that you decided we could be friends the day before the reservation."

"I didn't know anything about this, what was the occasion?" She asked, intrigued.

"I was going to ask you to get my crow. This was the only day they had open."

His attention was pulled away by their waiter getting their drink order. Butterflies filled Tara's stomach, she took a breath trying to regain control of her emotions.

"I see." Tara stated, her hands shaking under the table. "Well it's a nice place, definitely the fanciest in town. We could have gone anywhere though, you know me, I'm good with pizza." She giggled.

"I know. I guess this isn't really a friend-only restaurant but I thought it would be good since I already made the reservation. We can go somewhere else if you'd like?" He asked gazing in her eyes with an expression she couldn't place.

"No, this is perfect. Thank you again." She smiled.

He didn't take his eyes off of hers at any point during the dinner, the intensity of his gaze had her insides tingling.

"You wanna get out of here?" He asked after they finished eating. Their conversation was easy, not stressed or awkward in the least like she was expecting.

"Sure." She nodded, pulling her coat securely around her. She turned her cell on long enough to check for any emergency calls, luckily she had managed to charge it a few minutes before Jax got out of the shower.

" _How's work? I miss you. Wish we could have gone out to dinner. You would have loved the restaurant. You going to be done soon? Maybe we can still hang out?"_ The text from Dean being the only missed message.

" _No, I think I'll be here most of the night. I'll see you tomorrow. I'm sorry I had to bail on you, Gemma really needed my help."_ She hit send, a sick feeling in her stomach. She hated lying to him, but she shut her phone back off.

"Ready?" Jax asked after paying the bill.

"Yep." She followed closely behind him to his bike.

"I figured we'd just ride awhile if that's okay?" He asked, getting her permission to keep her out a little longer.

"Sounds great." She hung on tightly, allowing herself to scoot a little farther up than she needed to, inhaling his scent.

He smiled to himself, he loved the feeling of her arms wrapped around him, her body pressed against his back.

By the time he pulled back into TM it was after 1 am. Tara hadn't realized that so much time had passed. She was having so much fun, it seemed like no time before it was over.

"That was fun, Jax. I'm glad we decided to do this whole friends thing." She grinned, elbowing him playfully.

"Me too." He nodded. "I just hope one day we can be more than that."

A car pulled into the driveway, Tara was blinded by the headlights at first. It was Dean. Her heart was pounding.

He climbed out of the car, glaring in Jax's direction. "I'll give you some privacy." Jax whispered, hating leaving her with him but this is what she would want him to do, not overreact and give her some space.

She nodded in his direction not taking her eyes off of Dean.

"What are you doing here?" She asked, stepping toward him.

"I missed you. How was work? Something wrong with your car?" He asked looking around the driveway.

"It was fine. No, I was too tired to drive from getting up at 3:00 this morning so Jax offered to give me a ride home." She stated, her eyes flickered to the ground.

"Oh, that was nice of him." He scowled.

"Yeah, we're working on being friends." Tara admitted. "I'm gonna go get some sleep, thanks for stopping by. I'll see you tomorrow though." She leaned into hug him but he didn't return the hug.

She stepped back staring at him. "Everything okay?"

"I was just wondering if you're going to stop lying to me?" He spat, narrowing his eyes.

"What do you mean?" She asked, her voice was shaking.

"I know you weren't working, Tara. When you cancelled our dinner plans I took my mother out instead and low and behold who do I see at the restaurant? You and Teller. So just tell me the truth, please. Don't I at least deserve that much?" His expression was a mixture of anger and sadness.

She stiffened at his words. She was busted. "You're right. I'm sorry. Let me explain, please." She pleaded. "Jax and I are working on being friends, he's going through a lot and needed me. I hated to bail on you and I shouldn't have lied. I'm sorry. I didn't want you to be jealous. He's just my friend." She explained.

He nodded, "If I thought that were true then maybe I could get past this, but I don't. You and Jax will never be able to be friends, there will always be that history between you. I can't be the one that you use to make him jealous or whatever this is any longer. I thought after awhile you would let him go but I see now that you will go to any lengths to be with him, even lie to me to do it. I'll make this easy for you, Tara. I'm going to let you go. If there's ever a time that you do walk away and forget about him, give me a call. Until then, this just won't work." He gave her a sad smile and climbed in his car.

She wanted to run after him and beg for his forgiveness but she knew he was right. She may have loved spending time with him, but she never let herself open up to him. She guarded her heart. She didn't have any plans for her and Jax to be anything more than friends but she knew she still had feelings for him or else she wouldn't have lied. That didn't change what Jax had done and that they could only be friends but it wasn't fair to subject Dean or anyone else to her unwillingness to open her heart and chance getting hurt again.

She sighed and walked back toward the house. She smirked and shook her head at Jax trying to hide in the shadows watching her and Dean's interaction from the window. His white shirt stood out against the darkness.

"See anything interesting out there?" She asked, biting back her smile.

"Maybe. Everything okay?" He answered, looking unremorseful for being caught.

"Peachy." She grimaced. "He broke things off; said we weren't right for each other."

"I'm sorry, Tara." His grin told her he wasn't sorry at all.

"Yeah, I can see that." She smirked. "I'm probably better off single anyways."

"Well he's a dumbass, anyone who intentionally fucks things up with you has to be a dumbass so I agree you're better off without that loser."

She couldn't hold it in any longer, the laughter escaped from her lips before she could reign it in and she was doubled over laughing. He smiled but was confused, unsure of what was so damn funny.

"You alright?" He asked again.

"Yeah, sorry." She took in a deep breath to regain composure.

"I love to see you laugh but care to feel me in on the joke?" He questioned, shaking his head.

"I have no idea. This whole situation, I guess. You calling Dean a dumbass for leaving me, him leaving me for lying to him about being with you, all of it. It's just crazy." She admitted, her stomach hurting from the laughter but she was feeling a lot better.

"You lied to him about me? About what?"

"I told him I was working when I went to dinner with you. He saw us at the restaurant and I lied to his face when he showed up here. I lied, he left, I deserved it." She sighed, sitting on the staircase.

"Oh." He answered. "Maybe you didn't tell him because you still have feelings for me." He gazed down at her.

Her eyes zeroed in on his, and she stood up placing her hands on his shoulders. "I will probably always have feelings for you." She whispered, letting her lips graze against his for only a second. "As much as I want to forgive you for what happened, I'm not ready to let that go yet or if I'll ever be able to." Their eyes were locked on each other's, and his hands were on her hips.

"What can I do to help you forgive me?" He whispered. "I'll do anything to win you back. Just say the word."

"Right now, just be my friend. Prove to me that you can be a man I can trust, a man I can be with, and then we will see. It won't be easy, it won't be overnight, it will take time, probably a long time, if ever. I don't want to sugar coat things with you, I want to be 100 percent honest, Jax. I don't know if the day will ever come that you and I can be more than friends, but if it does then I'll need to know beyond a shadow of a doubt that history will not repeat itself again. It will take time and effort for you to prove that to me." She kissed his cheek and stepped out of his grasp.

"Just tell me how to prove it to you, Tara. Anything you want and it's yours. I know it will take time but tell me how I can prove it to you over time, what do I need to do?" He questioned, reaching out to hold her hand.

She looked at the sincerity in his eyes. She kissed his hand. "For starters, please stop drinking so much and getting high all of the time and stop putting yourself in danger. I know that the club life can be dangerous, but taking unnecessary risks is just crazy so please don't do it. I couldn't bear it if something happened to you." She sighed. She wanted to stop sleeping around with women but that wasn't fair, he was a man, he had needs and she wasn't ready to satisfy his needs then someone would have to.

"I can do that." He agreed. "Anything else?"

She shook her head.

"What about girls?" He questioned.

Her hand was trembling. "I can't tell you that you can't be with girls, Jax. It's not my place."

"I won't be with girls either, I'll prove to you that I can be with only you."

"But you won't be with me, not for a long time and I don't want you making promises you can't keep." She pulled back. "Don't set yourself up for failure."

"Okay." He reluctantly agreed.

"Goodnight, Jax." She walked up the staircase, feeling happier than she would have expected given Dean had just broken up with her.

"Goodnight." He called up to her. "You'll see. I can do this. I can win you back." He mumbled under his breath.

He would do whatever it took to win her back, he had to. His whole world had been flipped upside down when she started dating someone other than him. He had to rectify the situation if he wanted any chance of happiness-true happiness. Damn, he sounded like such a pussy.

Tara looked through the photos that she and Dean had taken over the last couple of months, the regret was beginning to set in. She should have been honest with him and maybe things would be different now. Everyone has a choice, Jax had one when he ruined what they had, she had one when she ruined what she had with Dean. Maybe Jax and her were meant to be together, two miserable people who make bad choices and disappoint everyone they love.

"Tara?" Jax tapped lightly on her door.

"Yeah?" She placed her photos under her pillow and wiped the stray tears that trickled down her cheeks.

Jax poked his head in, "I just wanted to make sure you were okay." He knelt down beside her bed, "Have you been crying?" He wiped one of her tears away with his thumb.

"No, my eyes are just watering from being tired," She faked a yawn. "Did you need something else?"

"No, I just wanted to check on you, but if you don't want to talk about it I'll leave you alone." He stood up, giving her a small smile before turning on his heels to leave.

"Jax?" She called after him, he turned back around to face her, "thanks for checking on me."

He nodded, "I'll always be here for you babe, no matter what happens between us."

"Thanks." She said quietly.

She rested back against her pillow, things had turned so confusing over the last couple of days. It was exhausting.

Jax knocked on Gemma's door, "Ma, do you think we could get everyone here in the morning for a big breakfast for Tara? Her and that fuck broke up and she's pretty down about it." Jax explained when Gemma opened the door.

"Sure, baby. Is she okay?" Gemma questioned, wrapping her robe securely around her. "What happened?"

"I think she's okay," He sighed. "It was my fault." He ran his fingers through his hair.

"What did you do?" Gemma scolded, narrowing her eyes at him.

"I asked her out to dinner, she accepted. I guess she lied to him about it. He broke things off."

Gemma nodded in understanding. "That's not your fault, she wanted to go out with you. I'll have a big breakfast ready. Goodnight, baby."

"Night, ma." He smiled to himself, Tara would be pleased to have everyone together. She fit right in with their crazy SAMCRO family.

Tara woke up to the chatter of voices downstairs and a delicious scent in her room.

She was stunned to see all of her SAMCRO family sitting there waiting on her. "Did I miss the memo about a family breakfast?" Tara giggled.

"No, just a spur of the moment decision." Gemma placed some bacon down on the table.

"Well that works for me," Tara grinned, "I love big breakfasts."

"It was Jax's idea." Donna giggled. She was tired of the games the two of them were playing, they were meant to be together even if they were being stupid. "He wanted you to be surrounded by family after the Dean thing."

Opie nudged her, "Shhhh, stop it." He muttered.

"You did this?" Tara asked Jax, "For me?" Her green eyes locked on his blue.

"I thought you'd like us all to be here, it's not a big deal." Jax stated. "We're a family, we're all here for you."

"Thank you all. I'm fine though, honestly. You didn't need to go through all of this trouble because of me." She smiled. "I do like family breakfasts though."

"It was no trouble to come eat breakfast." Opie laughed. "Besides you're my baby sister so anytime you need me, I'll be there, especially if Gemma's cooking." He winked at her.

"Yeah, Yeah. Let's eat. You all have work to do back at TM." Tara laughed.

"Look at her getting all bossy." Piney chuckled. "You're teaching her well, Gem."

"Damn straight, us girls got to stick together." Gemma nodded.

Tara loved having everyone together, just as Jax had suspected. Her mood had improved and she was sure that with the help from her SAMCRO family she would be just fine.

She would keep herself busy with getting ready to start school, work, and hanging out with Opie, Donna, and Jax. It was nice to have him there for her, even if they were just friends.

 **3 Weeks Later**

It was a slow day at TM. Gemma was in the clubhouse with Clay. Opie, Donna, and Jax were in the office goofing off while Tara filled out her last bit of papers for school. She had gone to orientation and was back at the office finishing up her last day of work before classes start on Monday.

Opie and Jax were wrestling around on the sofa and Donna was pretending she was a ring announcer.

Tara rolled her eyes but laughed at the three of them. She knew they were trying to keep her mind off things and it was definitely working.

"Hey, how about we all go out to get some food, a maybe catch a movie tonight?" Donna asked, she was desperate to get out of Charming for a couple of hours.

"If that's what you wanna do. I was thinking we could go get high." Op countered.

"You always get high. Let's mix it up." Donna complained. "Jax, Tara, what do you think? Dinner…Movie?"

Tara looked from Donna to Jax. "Why not? I'm in."

The smile that Jax gave her made her feel weak in the knees, she would have to remind him later that they were going out as friends-she may have to remind herself as well.

"Hell yeah, let's do it." Jax agreed.

"Okay okay, I'm outnumbered by a bunch of chics." Opie laughed, hitting Jax's shoulder.

"Fuck you bro," Jax laughed "you know you'll do anything to keep your old lady happy, so shut up."

"Yeah except I'm pussy whipped over pussy I'm getting… you, my friend are friend-zoned." Opie and Donna chuckled.

Jax held up his middle finger.

"Maybe not." Tara smirked, her cheeks burning hot. She hadn't meant to say that out loud.

Jax's head snapped around to her with a look of shock, excitement, and pure happiness. He knelt down beside her. "You serious?" His heart couldn't take it if she was just messing with him.

"Can you give us a minute?" She asked Op and Donna.

They nodded and left the room, Donna was chuckling. "Think they're gonna fuck right there in the office?"

"Eww. That's my sister." Opie cringed.

Donna laughed harder, "Get used to it baby, I don't think Jax was ever really friend-zoned. Their chemistry is off the charts; I think fate will always find a way to pull them back together no matter how much they fight it. I mean seriously, SAMCRO's princess was given away at birth and managed to find her way back here and hook up with the Prince, you don't think that was fate?"

"I try not to think about it." Opie grimaced.

"Are you serious?" Jax asked again. "You said it would take time. Please don't mess with me right now." He begged.

"I am serious. It will take time for us to move past this, but I do want to try. We will just have to take it slow for a while. I've tried fighting this crazy magnetic pull we seem to have and it doesn't work." She placed her arms around his neck. "You will still have to earn my trust before I fully commit to you, but if things keep going like they have these last few weeks, I think we will do just fine." She stared into his eyes.

He brought his lips down on hers with a force that rocked her body. She grabbed his hair pulling her closer to him, her tongue dancing with his.

She pulled away and took a breath after a few minutes. "Wow." She chuckled.

He smirked but had the same dazed expression she did. He pulled her to him again, this time slower, passionately.

They were interrupted by someone clearing their throat. "Tara?" Sally, one of the crow-eaters stuck her head in the door.

"Yeah?" Tara turned around, panting, trying to catch her breath. "What's up?"

"There's a tall dark and handsome man out here looking for you. Says it's important." She grinned.

"Dean?" Tara asked her.

"I'm not sure. He's cute though." Sally left as quickly as she came.

She rushed outside with Jax hot on her heels, he wasn't about to let this fucker come in now and ruin what they had already. He was just now getting her back, there was no way he was going down without a fight.

Tara froze, her smile faltered. Her heart felt like it was going to jump out of her chest, her legs felt like jello, her whole body was trembling.

"What's wrong?" Jax asked, the first to notice a change in Tara's demeanor. Tara didn't move, she didn't make a sound.

"Hello, Tara." The man flashed his menacing grin.

Tara's eyes flickered to Jax, who wrapped his arm around her protectively, then back to the man in front of her.

She took a calming breath, "Alec."


	8. Chapter 8

Tara's breathing evened out, all of the fear she once felt left her. She was surrounded by her SAMCRO family, if anyone should be afraid it should be Alec.

"The fucker from Chicago?" Jax questioned through gritted teeth.

Tara nodded but never took her eyes off of Alec, "You shouldn't have followed me here."

"You're my fiancé, of course I'm going to find you." Alec's smug expression hadn't disappeared.

"No, She's not." Jax shielded her with his body, "But I'm glad you're here. It saves me a trip to Chicago."

"Ah so I see Tara here is still spreading her lies about me." Alec's eyes hardened.

"No it was all true when I took the time to mention you at all." Tara said boldly, it felt good being able to stand up and face him.

"Tara's mentally ill, you can check the hospital she was supposed to be at when she ran, she's makes up these stories in her head and believes they're true." Alec was focused on Jax.

"Did she fake the scars too?" Jax growled.

"Ah that, Yes. She paid someone to do that so she could prove I was abusive." Alec stated, unconcerned with how close Jax had stepped to him.

"What's going on here?" Clay interrupted. Tara didn't notice that Gemma, Clay, Opie, Piney, and Donna had gathered around.

"Meet Alec, Tara's ex-fiancé from Chicago. I was just about to show him how things are done around here." Jax smirked, "SAMCRO style."

Jax moved lightning fast, grabbing Alec around the throat, Tara watched wide-eyed.

Clay grabbed ahold of Jax's arm, "What the hell are you doing son?"

"Let him Clay. This bastard hurt Tara back in Chicago. He deserves everything he's got coming to him and more." Gemma stated.

"WHAT?" Piney shouted, "You hurt my daughter!" Piney pulled out his handgun turning it on, Alec.

"Hold on, Old man," Jax objected. "We're going to make him suffer for what he did to her, shooting him now won't cause any suffering."

"Give me the gun, pop." Opie reached for the gun. "Jax is right, he will pay for what he did to her. No one hurts my little sister and walks away from it."

Tara watched the expression in Alec's eyes slowly turn to fear. She assumed he realized that coming here was a mistake, she had family now that would protect her.

"Wait!" Alec shouted as Jax shoved into the back of the van. "You should know, if something happens to me ATF is going to raid this piece of shit clubhouse." His smug expression was back.

"I doubt ATF will make a move on us over the likes of you, asshole." Gemma sneered.

"They will," Tara sighed. Her heart heavy again for bringing this drama to their doorstep. "His father is an ATF agent."

This caused the guys to pause, ATF was a bitch and could cause a lot of problems for SAMCRO.

"Oh well, it won't be the first time we've dealt with them." Jax climbed inside the back with Alec, Opie right behind him.

Clay turned to Juice, "You, Tig, and Bobby have the prospects help get this place cleaned up in case they do raid the clubhouse. We don't want them finding anything they shouldn't. Erase the camera from when this asshole showed up, work your magic so it doesn't look like anything has been erased. We don't want any record of this fucker here. Work the story with the witnesses in the lot so they all know what to say if questioned. Get it done, then meet us at the cabin."

"Got it." Juice answered and ran off to the job he was ordered to do.

"Gem, you stay here and keep me informed if ATF does show…"

"NO! I'm going. I'm going to be there for Tara, Tiggy can keep you updated." Gemma interrupted, pulling Tara with her to her Cadillac.

"You alright baby?" Gemma asked Tara as they followed behind the van.

Tara nodded, "I was shocked, I don't know how he found me." She looked out the window, she knew that pretty soon Alec would be dead and she would never have to worry about him bothering her again but the feeling that gave her made her uneasy.

The thought of murder made her nauseous, she had plotted his death multiple times but now that his death was becoming a reality, she wanted to throw up. She wanted to run away and hide under her covers like a child.

"If his old man is ATF it probably didn't take much." Gemma said softly. "It's going to be okay, Tara. He won't ever be able to hurt you again."

The easy-going attitude Gemma had with the soon-to-be-murder her son, husband, and friends were about to commit rattled Tara. No one but her seemed the least bit concerned that this wasn't the way to handle things. She had a feeling that this wasn't the first time any of them have ever dealt with something like this, maybe not this personal but murder was probably second nature to them.

"I know." Tara answered, laying her head back on the seat and closing her eyes. She hoped this apprehension passed soon.

After an hour they pulled off of the main road onto a gravel road, Tara's stomach was doing flips when she spotted the cabin. She put her head in her lap trying to control her breathing. Her fingers were tingling; she was pretty she was hyperventilating.

"Shh. Tara, it's okay baby. Calm down." Gemma soothed, but it fell on deaf ears to Tara. Gemma slung her door open and ran to the other side, sliding Tara's legs out of the car.

"What's wrong?" Piney asked. Tara was pale and shaking.

"Tara?" Jax called out but she didn't look up.

"I think she's having an anxiety attack." Gemma announced, "We got to the cabin and she freaked out."

"Baby. SHHH." Jax pulled her against him. "I'm here. I've got you. He won't hurt you. SHHH." Jax held her tightly against him, rubbing her back.

"She okay?" Op asked when Piney walked back to the van.

Piney nodded, "Let's get this piece of shit around back, let's not give him the satisfaction of seeing her break-down."

Opie opened the door back up and blindfolded him, "I tried telling you guys, she's mentally ill, she needs to be institutionalized." Alec stated after hearing Piney and Opie's conversation.

"Shut the fuck up." Opie decked him knocking him unconscious." Opie pulled him out of the truck, smirking at Piney. "Guess he don't need to be blindfolded now."

Opie turned his gaze back to Jax was still holding Tara against him. He would have to go easy on Jax, it was clear that he really did love Tara. He just had a bad way of showing it sometimes. In this moment, it was crystal clear, Jax Teller was in love with her.

"You okay now?" Jax asked, after she finally stopped shaking. "If not, I can do this all day." He smirked.

She laughed, it was a small quiet laugh, but it made his heart swell with joy nonetheless.

"I think I'm okay. If not, I'll take you up on that offer." She winked, "What are you going to do?" Her eyes focused in on the empty van.

"SHH. Don't worry about that." He replied, sensing her uneasiness about all of this. "Gemma will be with you up here. I'll see you soon, okay?" He kissed her forehead lightly.

She stared at his retreating back.

"Hey, let's go get something to drink." Gemma offered.

Tara nodded and followed after her but her eyes stayed on Jax's back until he disappeared from her sight. Gemma led her into the kitchen and poured a glass of water for each of them.

Alec's screams echoed outside and Tara flinched and gripped the table.

"You weren't afraid that he was going to hurt you, were you? All of this was out of concern for what they were going to do to him?" Gemma questioned.

Tara sighed, "Not really out of concern for him because I hate him. I don't know how to explain it." She stared at the kitchen table.

"You weren't raised in this life, so all of this is new to you. That's understandable." Gemma responded.

Tara's eyes flashed to Gemma's, "this isn't new to you? Does this sort of thing happen a lot?"

"This is part of the life, sweetheart. We deal with those who hurt our family. It's not a lot that we have to do this, not many people try to stand against us but it happens occasionally."

Tara sat quietly pondering Gemma's words when another scream filled the air. Tara's hands covered her ears, trying her best to block out the sound.

As much as she loved her family, she wasn't sure she'd ever be okay with this. Torturing and murdering people, even if they were sadistic like Alec, just didn't sit right with her.

Tara jumped up and stormed outside. Gemma ran behind her, "Tara, you don't want to go back there. Stop baby."

Tara turned the corner and stopped in her tracks, Alec's bloody body laying lifeless on the ground but Jax kicked him again.

"STOP IT!" Tara shouted.

All eyes turned to her.

"Babe, go back inside." Jax pleaded.

"NO!" She crossed her arms, "This is unnecessary. Just stop."

"It's necessary. He hurt you, Tara." Opie protested.

"That's right. He hurt me, he didn't hurt any of you so I'm saying STOP." Tara replied.

"You're right, he hurt you and I won't let anyone live who hurts you. I just can't do it." Jax stated.

"Fine. I know I can't talk you out of killing him, murder is apparently something that doesn't bother any of you so if you're going to kill him then just do it. Stop dragging it out. If you care about me at all, then just end it if you're going to." Tara turned on her heels and walked back toward the house. She froze when the gunfire rang through the air. She looked back briefly to see Jax with his gun out pointed in Alec's direction.

She swallowed the bile that rose in her throat and turned back around suddenly wishing she didn't see who pulled the trigger.

"You okay?" Opie jogged up behind Tara.

Tig and Bobby came around the corner, "Hey bro everything is cleaned up back home, Juice brought the bikes back on the tow truck."

Opie nodded.

She shook her head, "I just want to go home. Please just take me home."

"You don't want to ride with Jax?" Opie asked.

She shook her head again, "please?" She pleaded.

"Okay." He agreed. "Let me go tell them." He walked quickly to the back were Clay, Jax, and Piney were discussing the best place to put the body.

"Hey, I'm gonna give her a ride home." Opie announced.

"I can take her." Jax protested.

"She doesn't want you too." Opie stated with an apologetic shrug. "Sorry bro. I offered for you to do it, she said she wanted me to."

"She saw you shoot him. She will need time to process." Gemma declared, "She's not used to this stuff yet, that's why she broke down. She hated him and wanted him dead but I think the actual process of it is getting to her."

"Let me tell her goodbye at least." Jax stated, walking back up to Tara who was sitting on Opie's bike.

"Hey." He whispered.

"Hi." She muttered.

"I'm sorry you saw that, I couldn't sit back and let him keep breathing after what he did to you. He needed to die." Jax stated, standing quietly letting her absorb his words.

"I know you see it that way, but I don't. You murdered a man in cold blood, I understand why you did it. I know it's my fault that you did it. I want to go home; I need time to process things. We will talk later, okay?" She gave him a quick hug, "can you tell Op I'm ready to go, please?"

"This is not on you. It's all on him. He's the reason he's dead, not you." Jax objected, "You sure I can't take you?"

Tara shook her head, "Just get Opie." His defeated expression broke her heart, she really believed that this murder was solely based on vengeance for what Alec did to her, but how many other murders were there?

Opie handed her a helmet. "Ready?"

"What happens now?" She asked deep in thought, "I mean when his dad and ATF start asking questions?"

"We take it one day at a time, all evidence that he was ever at the lot has been erased. If they question you tell them you haven't seen him since Chicago. If they search, they won't find anything. They'll go away when they come up empty handed." He replied, strapping on his helmet.

She sighed, "Something tells me it won't be as easy as that."

"Jax really cares about you, ya know? If he wouldn't have ended him, one of us would have. Don't be so hard on him, sis." Opie added.

"Yeah." She nodded, looking in Jax's direction. "I'll be right back." She climbed off of his bike and walked toward Jax who was sitting on a stump facing the opposite direction.

"Hey, I'm sorry." She wrapped her arms around Jax's shoulders, hugging him. "I shouldn't have taken it out on you." She whispered in his ear.

Jax threaded his fingers with hers. He pulled her around and sat her in his lap. "It's okay."

"No, it's not. You protected me from him, you gave me justice when no one else would. I understand that. I don't think I'll be able to wrap my brain around some of the things SAMCRO does, but I'll try. Piney, Opie, and all of you are my family and I love you all so much so I promise I'll try. Take me home." She stood up and pulled him off of the stump.

"You love me?" Jax smirked.

"I didn't say that." Tara's face flushed bright red.

"Yes, you did. You said Piney, Opie, and all of us, which I'm pretty sure includes ME," He pointed a finger at his chest, "are your family and you love us all. So see, you said you love me." He grinned.

"Shut it, Teller. Take me home." She bit back a smile.

"Not until you tell me you love me." He laughed, dodging her slap to his chest. She chased him around the lawn.

"Fine, I guess I'll go back to my original plan and have Opie take me home." She turned away from him and he caught her by the waist.

"I don't fuckin think so," He smirked and pulled her against him. She could feel his erection pushing against his jeans. "the only thing you're going to ride is me. I mean my bike." He led her to his bike and slid on in front of her.

"I liked the first option better." She leaned up and whispered in his ear.

"That can be arranged." He groaned his erection throbbing. "Just say the word."

"Take me home and we'll see." She winked.

He fired up the Dyna without another word and hurried toward home, his anticipation growing by the minute.

Jax had his mouth on hers before they were in the house. He picked her up and her legs wrapped around his waist, he carried her up the stairs to his bedroom.

He set her on her feet, "Are you sure? I want you to be ready. I don't want you to rush into this, as much as I want you right now, I want you to be sure."

She rubbed his face lightly, "I want you too, so bad." She attacked his mouth again, stopping long enough to strip out of her clothes.

He eased himself into slowly gradually picking up speed and intensity. "You are so fuckin tight, baby. You feel so good."

She rolled them over taking control, "You feel even better." She winked.

She screamed out his name as he brought her to orgasm, he exploded inside of her shortly after.

She climbed off of him and walked to the shower, "You coming?" She beckoned for him to follow.

"Ready for more already?" He smirked.

"Well, I need someone to wash my back and you're the only one here so let's go Mister." She chuckled.

"As you wish." He bowed down playfully. "You know when you get in there you're going to want this." He placed her hand on his penis.

"You're a class act, Teller." She rolled her eyes.

Jax's burner was ringing, "Yeah?" His expression changed rapidly from playful to angry-annoyance. "Alright. Be there soon."

"What's wrong?" She asked him in a whisper.

"ATF is at the clubhouse. I've got to head over. I'll be back as soon as I can?" He asked.

She nodded, "Okay. Be careful. If his dad is there, he can be scary."

He scoffed, "I'm not afraid of fuckin ATF pricks."

"Just saying." She forced a grin. She wasn't lying Alec's father had always scared her. He was always a hard ass, especially to her. He always said Alec could do better than her-an orphan with no money or high social standing.

"I'll be back soon." He promised, throwing his clothes on and rushing out of the room.

Jax pulled into the lot. "What's going on?" He asked Juice and an Agent.

"Who are you?" The agent asked interrupting Juice.

"Jax Teller."

"My name is Donald Baker, I'm looking for my son Alec." He stated.

"Don't know an Alec, I think you have the wrong garage." Jax lied easily.

"What about Tara Knowles, I have intel that she works here." The agent asked, looking around the lot.

"What does Tara have to do with any of this?" Jax questioned.

"Tara and my son Alec are engaged. She had disappeared and he traced her back to here. He said he was coming to pick her up and bring her home. I need to speak with Tara, maybe she's seen him." He insisted.

"Juice, call Tara and get her here." Jax ordered. "I don't think she will be able to help you."

"We'll see about that." Donald growled.

"She's on her way." Juice announced.

Jax nodded in his direction.

"Long time, no see, Ms. Knowles." Don greeted her. "Where's Alec?" He questioned.

"What? I haven't seen Alec in months." Tara stated calmly.

"You sure about that?" He asked, glaring at her.

"Yes. I have not seen him." She didn't back down, Jax was impressed.

"Search the clubhouse." Donald called out to the waiting agents. "Find anything about my son and his whereabouts."

"You're not going to find anything," Tara replied. "he never came here."

"You better start telling the truth, Tara," Donald argued. "or this new little family you have acquired is going to be in a lot of trouble. We will dig until we find whatever it takes to put them all in prison. Maybe even you. If you don't want that to happen, tell me where my son is right now, last chance!" He shouted at her.

"Back off!" Jax growled. "She doesn't know anything, she told you that. So look all you want, there's nothing to find and we have nothing to hide."

"Be quiet Mr. Teller or I'll arrest her right here and take her down for questioning and not give you the courtesy of being here by her side. Don't try me." Don stated.

Tara's heart was pounding, nothing she said would help their situation. If she told him what he wanted to know, they would be arrested for murder. Jax would probably spend the rest of his life in prison, because of her. If she didn't tell him, she knew he was telling the truth he would dig around until he found something that would bury SAMCRO.

She looked to Jax and back at Donald, "I haven't seen Alec in months. I broke off our engagement and moved out of Chicago, I haven't seen or heard from him since." Tara answered, hoping the guys managed to clean up whatever shit they had that could get them into trouble.

"I guess we're doing this the hard way." Donald shrugged walking away. "Find anything?" He called out to the agents walking out of the clubhouse.

"No, nothing. We looked at the cameras they don't show your boy anywhere on the lot the day he was supposed to come." One of the agents answered.

Donald nodded and walked back to Tara. "Why did you break off your engagement, Ms. Knowles?"

"You know why." Tara frowned, unsure of where he was going with this.

"You allege he abused you, is that correct?" He questioned.

Tara narrowed her eyes, "Well, I say that all of that is in the past, since I haven't seen him since I left Chicago. I wish him the best in his life, and hope he finds happiness." She answered, not taking the bait. "If there's nothing else, your men found nothing here, so feel free to leave."

He nodded, "I'll see you both real soon." All of the agents pulled out of the lot.

Jax held a finger up to his mouth, "check the place for bugs, check everywhere." He whispered to Juice.

"Got it." Juice and the prospects got to work sweeping over the entire clubhouse.

"You were great." Jax whispered in Tara's ear. "I'm so proud of you."

She gave him a small smile, this was only the beginning. They were in for one hell of a ride, she blamed herself for bringing all of this drama into their lives.


	9. Chapter 9

The uneasiness Tara felt never faded but she accepted the way things were. This was the family she was born into; the lifestyle she was born into. She may not have grown up around the club, but over the last few months she had grown to love each and every member, and would be there for them no matter what happens next.

It had been a week since Alec had "disappeared." ATF hadn't been back to the clubhouse since either but Tara had a feeling Alec's father was still lurking around, watching and waiting. She knew that he wouldn't give up on finding Alec, he was his pride and joy. He would search to the ends of the Earth if he had to.

All of these thoughts kept Tara tossing and turning at night. Her alarm blared way to early. She had to leave for Oakland for five days for classes and wasn't looking forward to being away from her family, from Jax specifically. Things with him were better than she could've imagined, despite everything. She could see the effort he had put into their relationship; she was proud of him.

"Stay." Jax whispered in the darkness, pulling her into his side.

"You know I can't. I've got to go to school. I'll be back on Saturday." She kissed his chest, laying her head down and listening to his heart beating.

"It's not that far, you can stay here and commute back and forth. I don't want you staying in Oakland by yourself." He reiterated his previous worries, the same worries he's been telling her for days.

"I'll be fine. If you're that worried, you are always welcome to come stay with me." She stated, knowing that he couldn't or wouldn't do that.

"You know that's not an option." He groaned, rubbing his eyes.

"Neither is commuting, at least not right now. I'll see you Saturday. Be good." She pushed off the bed, dropping her lips to his before going to get dressed.

"You sure I can't change your mind?" He moaned, rubbing his erection, making her mouth water. Her body was begging for her to drop the clothes and let him change her mind.

"You're not playing fair, Teller." She sighed, shook the image out of her head and walked into the bathroom leaving him to fondle himself in privacy. If she watched much longer she wasn't sure she'd be able to leave.

He followed her into the bathroom and circled his arms around her waist. "Be careful. Call me if you notice anything suspicious. We have enemies everywhere, so be safe." He kissed her head. "Promise me you will be safe."

"Promise. You be safe too and no girls." She stared at him through the mirror. "I'm serious Jax, there will not be a second chance if you betray me twice."

"You have nothing to worry about." He spun her around so he could look in her eyes rather than looking at her reflection through the mirror. "I promise."

She nodded but she didn't trust him, as much as she wanted to, she just couldn't. He had told her before that she was all he ever wanted and then broke her trust by cheating with that whore. She said she would try to get past it and she was, but it would take a lot longer than a few months to let it go completely. If ever.

"I've got to get going or I'll be late. I'll let you know when I get there." She hugged him tightly, inhaling his scent and kissed him quickly.

She walked out of the room and scooped up the shirt he had worn the previous day from the floor and put it in her bag. "Smells like you." She informed him when he gave her a questioning look.

"You could stay and have the real thing…" He smirked.

"Bye Jax." She hurried out the door calling out her goodbyes to Gemma and Clay, not stopping for breakfast.

She had finished all of her classes for the day, some of them were boring. She almost fell asleep in some of them. She was glad her day was over, she was ready to just go lay down and talk to Jax, if he wasn't busy. She was already missing him like crazy, the idea of commuting was looking better and better. She knew this was good for them though, it gave them some distance. She had a feeling the welcome home sex would be awesome too, not like the normal sex isn't awesome but going almost a week without it would surely make it better.

She made it back to the motel she was renting, her apartment wasn't ready yet so she was stuck here until next week.

"Tara." A man appeared from the shadows.

Tara jumped and dropped everything in her hand. "Jesus Christ, you scared the shit out of me. What do you want? How did you even know I was here?" She narrowed her eyes at him.

He bent down and picked up the bag that she dropped, "Charming's a small town, word gets around." He replied, with a small smile.

"Yeah. I guess so," She groaned. "What do you want, Dean?" She questioned again.

"I've missed you. I wanted to see you." He said softly. "How have you been?"

"I've been good." She replied.

"I guess I was right about you and Teller. I heard you were dating." He looked up at the sky.

"I guess you were. If you know we're dating then I ask again, what do you want? Why are you here?" She shifted her weight to her other foot, staring at him, waiting for an answer.

"I told you I just wanted to see you." He said again, smirking at her. "You don't really seem to happy to see me."

"Well I really just want to go in and rest. I'm exhausted." She answered.

"Yeah, well okay. I'll be in the area for a few days on business, maybe we can have dinner?" He questioned.

"I don't think that's a good idea. It was nice to see you, thanks for stopping by." She opened her door and waved him off, shutting and locking it behind her.

She laid on the bed and texted Jax, " _Call me when you are free. I miss you._ " She laid her phone on the night stand by the bed.

Her phone buzzed a few moments later, Jax's name appearing on the caller ID.

"Hey." She said excitedly. "How was your day?"

"Hey babe. Mine was aight, just dealing with Cara-Cara shit." He replied, grinning at the excitement in her voice. Shit, he missed her too. He loved being able to hear her voice.

"Chlamydia outbreak?" She chuckled.

"Something like that," He laughed with her. "A bigger porn company is trying to push Luanne out. We're dealing with it."

"I see." She sighed, she didn't like the idea of Jax in such close proximity with porn-stars it was bad enough she had to compete with every other girl that was associated with SAMCRO, she wasn't sure how she could compete with porn-sluts.

"How was your day? Classes go okay? Anything interesting happen?" He questioned.

"Everything was okay, classes were pretty boring. We don't start the important stuff until tomorrow." She switched the phone to her other ear. "I did have a visitor though at the motel." She revealed without thinking.

"Who?" Jax barked out, all playfulness gone.

She suddenly wished she hadn't disclosed this information, his mood changed almost instantly and she had a feeling it was about to get worse.

"Who Tara?" Jax asked again, annoyance evident in his tone.

"Dean." She whispered.

"SONOFABITCH! What did he want?" He growled.

"I don't know. I didn't give him much time to tell me." She answered.

"Well what did he say?" He asked, his voice harsher than he intended.

She took a breath, "He said he missed me and asked if I wanted to go to dinner while he was in town." She stated, "I told him that I was with you and I wouldn't go with him." She added before he could jump to any conclusions.

"MOTHER FUCKER!" Jax shouted.

"It's okay baby. I'm not interested in him. Only you." She tried consoling him.

"No, it's not okay. He knew you and I were together. He came looking for you at the shop, I let him know that you were with me now and you weren't here and not to come back." Jax snarled.

"Why are you yelling at me? I didn't do anything. He showed up and I told you. I could have not said anything." She stated.

"I'm sorry." His tone softer, "I didn't mean to yell at you. I know you didn't do anything, babe. Did he say how long he was in town?"

"A few days, but I told him I wasn't interested so I don't think he'll come back." Tara answered. She shook her head, Jax was definitely a hot-head but if some bitch came looking for him she'd probably react the same way.

"Okay. I'm sorry I let that fucker ruin our conversation. I've got to get back to club shit though. Can I call you later?" He asked, trying to keep his anger under wraps. She was right, he didn't need to be screaming in her ear about some asshole who was always trying to get what was his.

"Yeah, sure. I'm gonna take a nap. So if you call back and I don't answer, just call again. It should wake me up." She answered.

"How about you just call me when you wake up? You need rest so I don't wanna bother you." He objected.

"I'll talk to you soon then." She agreed, "bye babe."

She hung up the phone and drifted off to sleep.

"Clay, I need a couple of days off." Jax stated. "I need to go to Oakland."

"Something wrong with Tara?" Gemma asked before Clay could respond.

Jax shook his head, "not exactly. Dean went there after he left here this morning. I don't trust him. I just need to make sure she's okay." He played the making them worry about her card, he knew Clay was more likely to agree if he thought something could happen to her. He loved her like his own daughter so he'd do anything to protect her.

"Okay," Clay agreed. "Be back in a couple of days, if needed I can have Opie or Piney trade places with you on Thursday."

Jax nodded, "Yeah. Later." He was speeding off toward the house to pack some clothes.

Gemma smirked, she had a feeling that Jax had just played Clay. Dean didn't come off as a dangerous type, he seemed more like a little love-sick puppy. She had to admit though, she felt more at ease with Tara being in Oakland with Jax there with her.

Tara woke up to a knock on her door, she glanced at her phone. She had slept longer than she meant to. The knock came again. She groaned to herself. She had a feeling it was Dean and she was still groggy and didn't feel like dealing with him.

"I said I wasn't…" Her words trailed off. "Jax!" She jumped into his arms. "What are you doing here?"

"I like this reaction." He smirked. "Missed you, wanted to see you." He replied, holding her close to him and closing the door behind them.

"Did you have business here?" She asked after catching a breath from their long kiss.

"Yeah. You." He grinned. "I told Clay about Dean showing up, said I wanted to be here to protect you. So, here I am baby."

"YAY!" She exclaimed. "This is an awesome surprise. I missed you so much." She added.

"I missed you too. I don't like this arrangement," He laughed. "I couldn't even make it a whole day without seeing you again." He shook his head. "I sound like such a pussy."

"Not a pussy. A man who loves his girlfriend." She blushed, they hadn't said they loved each other yet. Not in so many words anyways.

"I think you may be right." He tilted her chin up to kiss her passionately.

"I am?" She questioned, her heart racing.

"You know you are. I love you Tara Grace Knowles." He admitted, gazing deeply in her eyes.

"I love you too." She choked out, teary-eyed.

He pulled her in for another hug. "Thank you for that." He whispered.

"For what?" She raised her head to look in his eyes.

"Loving me, despite everything I've done." He answered. He stared at an ugly picture of flowers on the wall, "you didn't agree with what happened with your ex but you stood by me anyways, you forgave me for the mistake with Wendy. You accept me, the club, even if you don't agree with it. You support me and I appreciate that babe."

Tara nodded, "I'll always be there for you, no matter what. I didn't like the way things happened with him but I understand."

Jax spun her around and started swaying them back and forth. Tara giggled, "Slow dancing in a piece of shit motel room to no music. How romantic."

"I'm all about the fairytale baby." Jax chuckled.

"I can see that." She winked. "You know what this fairytale could use?" She bit her lip, trying to hold back her smile while she watched his expression change from humor to lust in a split second.

"I think I have an idea." He murmured, running his fingers down her spine.

"Food." She confessed. "It could use some food, I'm starving."

"I've got a porterhouse for you right here." He used her hand to stroke his jeans over his erection.

"Did that line work the last time you used it?" She snickered and held out her hand for him to take it, "C'mon Teller, buy me dinner."

"Bossy." He picked her up and spun her around kissing her wildly.

"You like it." She panted trying to catch her breath.

"Of course. It's a turn on." He winked. "Aight, C'mon. Let's get you fed so we can come back here and have dessert."

They found a small little diner near the motel that reminded them of home. Tara scarfed down her burger and fries.

Jax watched her with an amused grin.

"What's so funny?" She questioned, wiping the ketchup from her mouth.

"You act like you haven't eaten in a month." He answered.

"Told you I was hungry." She replied.

They were all over each other before they made it all the way back into their room. Jax admired her nakedness. She was the most beautiful woman he had ever seen and she didn't even know it. He had been with a lot of women, more than he wanted to admit now, but none of them even compared to Tara. She had it all. She was smart, funny, incredibly beautiful, the most aggravating woman in the history of women but he loved every minute of it.

"Something wrong?" She questioned, a shy expression.

"No, why would you think that?" He asked, confused.

"You're just staring at me instead of well you know." She replied.

"I'm sorry. I was just thinking about how beautiful you are and you don't even know it." He answered, caressing her skin with his fingertips.

He entered her slowly enjoying every minute of the way her tight wetness felt around him. He eased in and out of her listening to her moans of pleasure. Her voice had quickly become his favorite sound in the world. Her words, her laugh, her moans when he was inside of her, even her light snoring. He loved it. He loved her.

They lay there wrapped up in each other's arms after they cleaned themselves up. She lay there listening to the sound of his breathing, it had evened out she knew he was sleeping. She was so glad she slipped up and told him about Dean. If she hadn't he wouldn't be here right now holding her tight. She didn't have to worry about who he was with or what he was doing right now and it was refreshing.

She let herself relax and drift off into a deep sleep, the best sleep she had in over a week.

Jax and Tara jumped up to someone pounding on the door.

"POLICE OPEN UP!" They shouted through the door.

They scrambled to throw some clothes on, Tara's heart was racing.

"What's going on?" Tara questioned the officer at the door.

"Tara Knowles?" The officer asked, ignoring her question.

"Yes. What's going on?" She asked again.

"We need you to come down to the station with us for questioning." He answered.

"Questioning for what?" Tara choked out.

"The disappearance of Alec Baker." They replied, leading her outside.

Her eyes shot to Jax who was being handcuffed by another officer, they hadn't put her in handcuffs but unlike her Jax wasn't cooperating.

"I don't know anything about Alec disappearing." Tara groaned.

Tara was having a panic attack by the time Alec's dad entered the interrogation room. She had known he was behind this but didn't think she would end up having to talk to him.

"I'm only going to ask this once, Ms. Knowles, where's my son?" He snarled at her.

"I've already told you. I do not know." Tara annunciated her words, hoping they would be more believable this time.

"I think you do." Donald narrowed his eyes. "Actually I know you do; so why don't we stop playing games."

Tara sighed and sat up straight in her chair, "This is going nowhere. I've already told you countless times I haven't seen him in months. Why is that so hard to believe?"

"Well a few reasons, the first being when Alec showed up at Teller Morrow he called me. He said he could see you through a window so he was going to talk to you." Donald paused, letting that information digest.

"Maybe he was just trying to throw you off. He didn't like it when you made him tell you his every move so maybe he told you he was at the lot so you wouldn't question his real whereabouts. I'm telling you the truth, he wasn't there." Tara glared in his direction.

Donald pulled a device out of his pocket. "How about we stop playing games Ms. Knowles." He hit play.

" _Thank you." "For what?" "Loving me despite all that I've done. You didn't agree with what happened to your ex but you stood by me anyways."_ He fast-forwarded the tape. _"I'll always be there for you, no matter what. I didn't like the way things happened with him but I understand."_

Tara's eyes were wide. "You bugged my room?" She took a breath and regained control. That didn't prove anything." She shrugged.

"Not exactly." Donald smiled. He knocked on the door and a few moments later it opened.

"I'll be right outside." Donald addressed the man on the other side of the door. "Let me know when you're ready for me to come back in."

Tara's mouth dropped open, "Dean?"

"Hello Tara. Nice to see you again." He grinned.

"What?" Tara shook her head in confusion. "What are you doing here? You did this?" She pointed to the tape across the table.

He nodded.

"Why?" She questioned, squinting her eyes in anger.

"It's my job." He replied simply.

"Your job?" She growled. "What the hell do you mean your job?"

"I'm a private investigator. I was hired by Alec Baker to track you down. When I did I was supposed to gain whatever information I could about your new surroundings, the town, the people you were with, the only problem is I never meant to fall for you." He admitted.

Tara scoffed, "you didn't fall for me. You played me."

"No, I didn't. I wasn't going to give them the information. You left me for Teller so I gave him the info he paid for. You did this Tara, not me." He stated.

"Lying bastard." Tara muttered under her breath.

"Just tell him what he wants to know Tara. Free yourself. Teller's going away for this, there's enough proof to take this to court. Trust me." Dean pleaded.

"That tape means nothing." Tara shook her head.

"No, but the video I have of Alec at Teller Morrow does." He argued.

Tara thought her heart stopped. "Get out."

"This questioning is all just a formality, fishing for a confession. We have the proof already honey. Save yourself." Dean stated before exiting the room.

Tara angrily wiped the tears away. Alec was an abusive asshole who got away with everything he ever did to her until the day he stepped on the TM lot, now he was going to be the reason she and Jax probably end up in prison. She hated Alec even more now than she did back then, he always managed to fuck up her life in one way or another. Even from the grave apparently.


	10. Chapter 10

Tara jumped straight up holding her chest. Her heart was beating rapidly. Tears soaked her face. Her entire body was covered in sweat. She felt as if all of the air had been sucked from her lungs, she was suffocating.

She blinked several times to clear her vision but there was only darkness except for the illuminated light on the clock sitting in its place on the nightstand by the bed.

1 a.m.

Confusion swept over her. How did she get back to the motel room? Where was Jax? She flipped on the lamp and looked around the room. Everything was in place. Who had cleaned it up? When the police took them for questioning the room had looked like a tornado had blown through.

Was it a dream? It couldn't have been. It felt so real. She picked up her phone, there was a text from Jax that came in at 10 p.m.

" _Sorry I missed ur call. We were in the middle of it. I hope u had a good day. I'll talk to u tomorrow. Sweet dreams babe."_

She reread the message a few times, her heart was still racing like she had been running a marathon. She called Jax only to get his voicemail.

If that was a dream it was the most vivid dream she had ever experienced and it scared the shit out of her. She had a feeling she wouldn't be able to rest or calm down until she heard Jax's voice, she had to know he was okay. Since he wasn't answering his phone, she did the only other thing she could short of calling Gemma.

She packed her stuff, climbed in her car and drove to Charming. Classes were important but she'd be brain-dead if she didn't at least find out for sure that it wasn't real. She had to be certain.

She unlocked the door at Gemma's and tip-toed to the stairs. She froze when she felt something hard and cold pushed into her back.

The light blinded her as Gemma flipped the switch, "Jesus I could've killed you. What are you doing here? Why ain't you at school?" Gemma hissed, removing the barrel of the gun from Tara's back.

"Is Jax here." Tara asked and took a calming breath as Gemma nodded.

"Everything okay? What's wrong?" Gemma questioned.

"I'll explain in the morning, right now I just need to see him." Tara called back as she hurried up the stairs to Jax's room.

She saw the outline of his body sprawled out on the bed and it instantly calmed her nerves. It had been a dream, just a dream.

Tara sat down on the bed and placed her hand over his heart. Jax jumped, eyes flashing to hers.

"Tara?" He rubbed his eyes taking note of her tear stained cheeks. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing. Everything is fine." She whispered.

"Why have you been crying? Why ain't you in Oakland?" He asked, sitting up and pulling her into his lap.

"It's stupid actually but I just needed to see you-see that you were here and not in jail I mean." She sighed, giving him a small shrug.

"Jail? What made you think I was in jail?" He questioned, he was still groggy and she was confusing the shit out of him.

"Well I'm not sure what happened. Everything is kind of fuzzy. I don't even remember much of today. I know I got out of class and when I got to the motel Dean was there-at least I think he was."

"Dean was at your motel?" Jax growled interrupting her.

"I'm not sure because I remember calling you and telling you about it and then you came there. You told me you loved me and then we were brought down for questioning by Alec's father and I found out that Dean's a Private Investigator hired by Alec to find me and somehow a recording device was placed in my bag or my room or something and they were using that and a video that Dean had recorded against us. It was horrible and then I woke up covered in sweat feeling like my heart was going to explode and I'm so confused. You are here so I know it wasn't real but it felt so real-so real that I'm sitting here with you now because I just had to see you and know for sure you were safe. I've just never had a dream that realistic before." She explained, wiping away the stray tears falling down her cheeks.

Jax held her close, "Shhhh. It's okay babe. It was just a bad dream." He spoke softly, in a calm soothing voice. He rubbed her back gently.

"I know." She nodded. "I just needed to be sure so that's why I came. I'm sorry I woke you."

"Hey. Don't be sorry. I'm glad you're here, I'm just sorry that all of this has you so tore up. That's my fault." He stated, mentally kicking his own ass for the pain she's enduring because of his need for revenge.

"It's not." She shook her head, "let's not talk about any of that anymore. Ever." She shuddered at the thought of someone actually placing a bug somewhere and her dream becoming a reality.

Jax understood her meaning and knew it was best to let it go. He was fairly certain that Dean wasn't a PI. Juice had looked into him when he first started dating Tara. The two of them may had been at odds over her but were in agreement that there was something just not right about that fucker. Nothing was found of any significance but after Tara's dream they may dig a little deeper, just to be on the safe side.

"Deal. Come on, get some rest you look exhausted. What time do you need to leave to go back to school?" Jax questioned, scooting down into bed and letting her lay on his chest.

"I'll make up the work I miss tomorrow. I just want to be here with you, like this." She yawned and nuzzled his chest.

"Okay. Get some sleep baby." He kissed the top of her head. "One more thing before you go to sleep though." He paused letting her look up at him.

"Yeah?" She asked, yawning again.

"All of that other stuff might not have been real, but I do love you." He rubbed her hair back, gazing into her eyes.

"You do?" She asked, stunned.

He nodded. "I do. More than you know."

"I love you too." She smiled and leaned up to kiss softly before settling back down to lay on his chest and listen to his heart beating.

That dream may have terrified her but this right now, being here wrapped in his arms was pure bliss. It was the perfect ending to a shitty night. She smiled to herself and let sleep take her again, hoping that the sound of Jax's breathing would keep all of the nightmares away.

"Come and eat kids." Gemma ordered outside of the door.

Both Jax and Tara groaned in response. It was way too early to be awake, but Tara had a feeling Gemma was getting impatient waiting to find out what was going on, why she was back here instead of at school.

She stretched her arms and legs out before climbing out of bed and treading downstairs with Jax following closely behind her his hand on the small of her back.

"Okay, good you're up. Now, what's going on?" Gemma questioned before they even got sat down.

Clay must have been waiting to because he put his paper down and watched them carefully when they entered the room.

"It's nothing." Tara blushed, embarrassed that she reacted the way she did over a dream.

"Bullshit. Something happened, nothing didn't have you almost getting shot sneaking into the house in the middle of the night. So let's have it." Gemma ordered, not taking her eyes off of Tara's.

"It's really nothing," Tara sighed. "a dream that scared me."

"You drove all the way here for a dream?" Clay asked, biting back a smile.

Tara nodded, "I needed to make sure he was okay."

"It must have been one hell of a dream." Gemma stated, tone softer, an amused smile.

Tara fought the urge to roll her eyes, they didn't understand and that was going to have to be okay she was just glad Gemma was easing up and not forcing her to talk about it in detail. She really didn't want to go through it again. The first time was more than enough.

"When do you go back to school?" Gemma asked, pouring another cup of coffee.

"Tomorrow, I guess." Tara muttered. She wasn't looking forward to going back, not now.

After breakfast Tara excused herself to lay back down, she had a massive headache.

Jax talked to Clay about digging deeper into Dean, giving Clay and Gemma the rundown on what caused Tara's departure from Oakland to Charming in the middle of the night. Jax still wasn't sure if Dean had really showed up at Tara's motel or not, since Tara didn't even know but he was going to find out one way or another-just without Tara's knowledge. He didn't want her carrying the burden of someone else like she was with Alec. He wouldn't put her through that again.

She was asleep when he made his way back up to the room. She looked so beautiful laying there, so peaceful. He vowed to himself to never make the mistake he did the first time; he would do everything in his power to keep her happy. She deserved all of the happiness in the world and he was determined to make sure she stayed that way. He refused to be the reason her heart broke again, if he could help it.

Tara felt refreshed after her nap, her headache had finally faded. Jax was nowhere in sight, but he had left a note saying that he had gone to the clubhouse and he loved her. Her heart felt so full, butterflies filled her stomach.

She stopped by Saint Thomas before heading to the clubhouse, a girl at her school had asked why she was taking classes in Oakland when they were offered in Charming. Tara hadn't heard of classes being offered in Charming but she was going to find out. The girl said her mom teaches in Charming part time and works at Saint Thomas as administrator the rest of the time.

"Hello Tara, I'm Margaret Murphy. It's a pleasure to meet you."

Tara smiled and shook her hand, "Thank you for taking the time to meet with me."

"What can I help you with?" Margaret asked, sitting down at her desk.

"I attend classes with your daughter, Cynthia," Tara explained, "She told me that the classes are offered here in Charming. I was wondering about how to apply to come here?"

"Why do you want to come here if you are already accepted there?" She asked.

"Well my family is here and my job. I still haven't found a job there and I didn't want my family to have to keep supporting me." Tara stated, leaving out Jax and SAMCRO. She wasn't ashamed of them but didn't want to advertise either, she had a feeling her affiliation with SAMCRO wouldn't help her with this particular task.

"I see." Margaret nodded. "I will see what I can do. Classes already started here a little over a week ago, so if you are serious about the transfer you may not be able to start until the fall courses start. If I can get you in you will have to work extra hard to catch up, they won't give you any slack for starting late. The classes may be full, they usually are but if someone dropped out, I may be able to get you in." She explained.

Tara nodded. "I understand and I appreciate whatever you can do."

"Fill these out. I'll be back to check on you in a moment." Margaret handed her a stack of papers. By the time Tara finished filling them out her hand was sore.

"Finished?" Margaret stuck her head in the door and asked.

"Yes ma'am." Tara nodded, handing her the paperwork.

"Good." Margaret flipped through the papers to make sure everything was filled out appropriately. "Well good news Ms. Knowles, there was a drop out and we should be able to transfer you in. I'll have to check to be one hundred percent certain but it shouldn't be a problem. I'll call you this afternoon and let you know."

Tara's face lit up, "Thank you. Thank you so much."

Tara hurried out of the hospital to TM. On the way there she decided to wait before telling anyone. She didn't want to get their hopes up and then something not work out.

Tara sat at the picnic table with Donna watching Jax and Opie work on their bikes.

When Saint Thomas's phone number appeared on her caller ID she couldn't contain her excitement.

"Excuse me." She stated before running off to sit in her car.

"Hello?" Tara answered, biting her lip.

"Ms. Knowles, this is Margaret Murphy." She paused. "I have good news. I was able to get the board to speed up transfer due to your circumstances. You start tomorrow morning. Can you be here in an hour we will go over all of the details and get you ready to go?"

Tara's smile was plastered on her face, she was going to be able to stay here in Charming with Jax and her family and continue her education.

"Yes, Thank you so much. I'll see you soon." Tara stated, jumping out of the car to give everyone the news-Jax specifically.

When she returned Jax and Opie were standing at the picnic table drinking a soda. She rushed up to him, jumped into his arms-knocking his soda all over the both of them.

"Sorry." She exclaimed laughing.

"It's all good. You alright?" He asked, smirking. "What's going on?"

"Yep! I'm great!" Tara giggled. "Gemma!" She shouted.

Gemma, Clay, and Piney stepped outside of the office.

"I have some news I wanted to share with you all," Tara looked to each one of them. "I'm not going back to school in Oakland."

"I thought school was what you wanted sweetheart." Piney spoke first.

"It is, just not in Oakland." Tara answered.

"Where then?" Opie asked.

"Here." Tara replied, holding up her finger to silence Jax who was about to interrupt. "A girl in my class said her mom taught part time here and I spoke with her today at Saint Thomas. She was able to get me transferred, I start tomorrow."

Jax picked her up and spun her around. "That's great!"

"I thought you'd say that." Tara winked.

"That's the best news I've heard all day. I was worried about you being in O-town by with no protection." Opie added.

"Well, no need to worry about that. I'll be staying here with my family." Tara smiled. "And in bed at night with you." She whispered.

Jax winked, "might not get much studying done."

Tara grinned. "I'll get lots of studying done in anatomy."

With that the group disbanded leaving Jax and Tara in their own little world.

"I love you." She whispered.

"I love you more." He stated, rubbing her cheek with the back of his hand.

"No way." She objected.

"I'll let you think you're right." He smirked.

"Hey lovebirds, lets finish these bikes bro." Opie rolled his eyes and laughed when Jax pulled Tara in for another kiss.

"I've got to get this done, I'll be finished as soon as I can 'kay?" Jax placed his forehead against hers.

She nodded, "No rush. I'm gonna head down and fill out my paperwork for tomorrow. I'll see you after."

Her paperwork was finished; it was official she would be attending school in Charming rather than Oakland. She hurried back to TM, it had only been two hours and she felt like she was going crazy. She would have never been able to get through days at a time without seeing him. Now she didn't have to, things had worked out perfectly.

Her dream still haunted her, she pushed it away, not letting it take away her happiness. She was here, Jax was here and for now things were going great. She refused to let her worries get in the way this time. They would deal with whatever happens later together. For now, she would let herself be happy. She would let herself be in love for the first time ever. She once believed she loved Alec, but the way she felt about him was nothing in comparison to the way she feels about Jax. It was a great feeling. For the first time since her parents died, she felt truly loved.

 _ **Authors note: Sorry for the short chapter, I didn't want to leave you hanging to long. Thank you all for your continued support. I appreciate each and every one of you and I hope you continue to read and enjoy the story. Much love to you all.**_


	11. Chapter 11---AUTHOR'S NOTE

_**Author's Note: I wanted to take a minute to answer the PM's and Reviews I've received asking when my stories will be updated.**_

 _ **My grandmother was placed on hospice, we were told she would only be with us a few more months-if that-so I decided to take a step back from writing and spend as much time with her as I can. I don't know how much longer she has left, but she's declining rapidly so this time with her is very important to me.**_

 _ **I will update my stories as soon as I can but have no time-frame at this time. I'm sorry that I left some of you wondering and waiting for the next update. I had posted a general announcement in the Facebook group awhile back, but it didn't even occur to me at the time that some of you aren't members of that group.**_

 _ **I appreciate all of your patience and understanding and I will update as soon as I can. Much love to you all!**_


	12. Chapter 12

Jax and Opie were still working on the bikes when Tara returned. She wrapped her arms around Jax's shoulders, "you really need to hurry up with that because I miss my boyfriend."

"Your boyfriend misses you too." Jax tilted his head back so he could kiss her. Hearing him refer to himself as _boyfriend_ did weird things to her insides.

"Good. Hurry." She grinned but walked away toward the office.

She sank down into the office chair, "still need me to work around here when I'm not in school?"

"Of course sweetie," Gemma replied, "I don't know how much work you'll get done with Jax being here too but at least he already has an apartment setup…" Gemma smirked, "just make sure you're careful, I don't need any grandbabies- just yet."

Tara's mouth dropped open, Gemma definitely spoke her mind, "I'll keep that in mind."

"What are you ladies talking about in here?" Jax asked, drying his hands off.

"I was telling Tara to make sure you guys are careful, I don't need any grandbabies just yet so wrap it up, son." Gemma pointed her finger at him.

"Got it, ma." Jax grinned, seeming unfazed by Gemma's bluntness.

"Yeah, got it." Tara agreed, hurrying out the door to hopefully end this conversation.

"You want to go for a ride?" Jax wrapped his arms around her waist.

"What did you have in mind?" She winked.

"Oh…I have lots in mind," he nibbled on her earlobe, "now that you're staying here we have plenty of time to do lots of… riding."

"MMM sounds good." She muttered, rubbing herself against him seductively before walking toward his bike.

Piney watched from the corner of the building, Tara was just like her mom in every way possible. She got her looks and she knew how to wrap the boys around her finger. He didn't think anyone would settle Jax down, but from the looks of it, his girl had. He would give them the space they needed, as long as Jax didn't cross any lines and hurt her. She's been through too much hell in her life to have her heartbroken from that little shit head. He loved Jax like his own son but he knew how much of a horny bastard Jax was…but from the looks of things, so is his girl. That thought alone made him nauseous.

The thrill of her being on the back of his bike was something he was almost certain he would never get tired of. He loved hearing her laughter in his ear, feeling her tight body pressed up against his back, just sharing something he loved with her was almost magical. He took her back to the park he took her too when they first hung out.

"I can't get over how beautiful it is here," she climbed off his bike admiring the scenery.

"Me either," he answered but was staring at her rather than the park view. Her eyes found his, she returned his smile, and hugged him.

She spun around, looking all around the park with a strong sense that someone was staring at her-someone besides Jax. Although there was no one in sight she still felt nervous. Her dream still haunted her, even though she tried to let it go.

"What's wrong?" Jax questioned, looking around the park with her.

"Oh, nothing, just paranoid I guess." She shrugged.

The blank stare he gave her confirmed he was waiting for her to explain, "Have you ever had a feeling that someone or something was staring at you?"

"I'm staring at you baby." He winked.

"Yeah…" She decided to let it go, she didn't want to sound crazy. "Hey, you wanna head back to the house, spend some…quality…time before I start school tomorrow?" She bit her lip and grinned.

"We don't have to go home for that babe, no one's here but you, me, and nature." He pulled her to him.

She definitely was not taking her clothes off here, not with the feeling that someone that she can't see is watching her or him or them. She wasn't sure who it was or what they wanted but she knew one thing for sure she wanted to get out of here before she found out either of those questions. Jax didn't need another reason to hurt someone else and risk getting into even more trouble than he's already possibly in if her dreams does become a reality.

"Yeah, but I'd rather go home," she purred, she was scrambling for an explanation, "that way we don't get interrupted, just in case someone shows up. Please?" She knew he would agree; she was fairly certain when he's this horny she could get him to do whatever she wants with the promise of sexual release.

"Whatever you want babe," he kissed her hand and led her back to his bike, swatting her ass as she climbed on, "let's do this." His motorcycle revved to life and they were off to take care of both of their needs.

She glanced around to see who it was that her nerves up but never saw anyone. She wasn't sure if there was just no one there and she was crazy or if they were going entirely too fast and everything was just a blur as the scenery whipped past them in his rush to get her home and naked. The latter seemed more possible since they made it back to their driveway in record time. The speed should have scared her, it would have scared most girls, but it was exhilarating for her. She actually wanted to go faster, although any faster would have probably dangerously unsafe.

They were both spent after making love into the early morning hours, she knew she should have been asleep hours ago since she had her first classes really early but when the sex is good as it is with Jax and your body craves more, sleep is not an option. She loved the feeling of being with him in every way possible. They fit together perfectly.

She had made it through her first class. She was behind since they had been in session before she transferred in, it would take some effort to catch up, but she was determined to succeed. She wanted this and would work hard to get it.

"Hey, your name is Tara right?" The boy that beside her in the class approached her.

"Yep." She gave him a polite small but in all honesty she was too tired for small talk. They would have plenty of time to exchange pleasantries but right now all she wanted to do was climb into a bed and catch up on the sleep that she missed out on last night.

"I'm Vinnie," he replied not noticing or just not acknowledging her lack of conversation, "are you from Charming? I'm not, I live in Lodi, I don't really know anyone here. I'm sorry if I'm rambling. I talk a lot when I'm nervous."

"It's okay," Tara sighed, deciding to be nice rather than blow him off completely, "I moved here a while back."

"Oh that's cool, so you're not a local either. I heard this town doesn't really take too kindly to out of towners, how did you manage to stick?" He asked.

"I just knew the right people, I guess. I have to get going. I'll see you tomorrow." She gave him a nod and walked away.

"I'm headed that way, mind if I walk with you?" He fell into step beside her.

"Suit yourself." She yawned.

He had talked incessantly from the time they got on the elevator until they reached the ground floor. He wasn't kidding about rambling when he was nervous.

"Hey babe." Jax greeted her with a kiss when she stepped outside, he was talking to her but his eyes were fixed on Vinnie. "How was class?"

"Hey, it was fine. This is one of my classmates, uh," her exhausted brain failed her, she couldn't remember what he said his name was. Usually she was good with names but not today.

"I'm Vinnie." He answered for her, holding his hand out to Jax.

"Jax Teller." Jax nodded at him, keeping his hand on her hip rather than shaking his hand.

The name must have rung some kind of bell with the kid or he finally noticed the kutte Jax was wearing, or maybe he even noticed the glare Jax was giving him, but he pulled his hand back rapidly, "I'll see you in class, Tara. It was nice to meet you both." He fumbled with the keys in his pocket and hurried toward his car.

"So who was that?" Jax asked.

"I told you…someone from my class." She stated, rolling her eyes at the jealousy in his tone.

Jax nodded dropping the subject. He didn't want to piss her off by needing a play by play of the conversation she had with Vinnie, he had a feeling today was not the day for that. She looked tired, that was his fault-not that he would change last night if he had a choice but she was still tired so letting this go was probably the best course of action for now. He didn't want to be a 'controlling asshole' as she once said. He talked to girls all of the time, he would have to deal with her talking to guys…classmates…even if he didn't like it at all.

 ** _Author's note: Thanks for reading! Thanks for the patience waiting on me to update this story._** **** ** _I'm not going to give a time frame for the next update since I have a few stories that I'm working on simultaneously but I will try to get one out to you soon._**

 ** _…_** ** _Dean will make an appearance in the next update…_**


	13. Chapter 13

Things had settled down for Tara. She hadn't heard anything else from Alec's dad. Things were pretty much back to normal. She had adjusted to her new class quickly. She loved having Jax and school right there in Charming.

Vinnie didn't mention that he talked a lot all of the time-not just out of nervousness-he rambled on about his life so much that Tara barely had time to focus on her own, but it was nice having someone to talk to outside of the MC. She knew Jax didn't like the idea of her having guy friends that weren't his friends that didn't stick to the 'old lady code' but he was smart and kept his mouth shut. She could tell him the truth that Jax himself would be more Vinnie's type than her but she liked watching him squirm so she kept that little detail to herself.

"I've got to get to class." She whispered into Jax's ear. Eyes still closed he pulled her down onto him, "No you don't. Stay in bed with me." He grinned and she rolled her eyes, this was their everyday routine when he was there and not on club business. "Bye baby. I'll see you in a few hours." She ran her tongue over his lips and chuckled from his groaning when she pulled away.

"Bye." He whined causing her to laugh harder before darting out of the room.

"Hey you."

Tara froze in mid-step, her conversation with Vinnie halted, a million thoughts raced through her mind at once.

"Hi." Vinnie spun around and smiled at the person who just interrupted his conversation.

"Get lost nerd I need to talk to Tara."

"Rude…" Vinnie hissed but walked away.

Tara closed her eyes, discreetly pinched herself, hoping to wake herself up from this dream…this nightmare. She turned slowly and faced him, "what do you want Dean?"

"I wanted to talk to you. I needed to talk to you." Dean smiled at her. "I missed you."

Tara's dream was playing on repeat in her mind, "I don't have anything to say to you. I'm sorry. Have a nice day…life…whatever."

"Tara wait." He grabbed her wrist.

"You know I heard a rumor about you." She bit her lip knowing how insanely stupid she was about to sound but she didn't care.

"What's that?" He asked unfazed by the way she glared at him and jerked her hand away.

"I heard you're a PI tracking me for my psycho ex-boyfriend," she paused watching his eyes for any sort of emotion.

"Seriously?" He laughed, "who in the hell said that? A PI? Damn I wish I would have known that."

She couldn't tell if he was just messing with her or not. She knew her dream was probably just a dream and nothing more but some people dreamed stuff from the future so maybe hers was a warning too?

"A friend." She refused to say she dreamt it.

"Your friend lied." His laughter ceased. "I'm definitely not a PI. I definitely wasn't tracking you for anyone and although I liked running into you at the garage that day…it was fate that brought me there not some crazy guy stalking some girl."

"Pot meet kettle." She muttered under her breath. She had an inkling he was telling the truth. She could usually read people pretty good and unless he was a hell of a good liar she couldn't see it. "Okay. Well. I was just wondering. Listen, I have to meet Jax." She gave him a small smile and turned away.

"Jax. Should have known." He growled. "You know you can do better than him? He's a nobody Tara who's going nowhere fast."

"That may be how you see him…but me…I see someone totally different when I look at him. I love him."

"You could love me too if you just gave me half a chance. You owe me that much." He grabbed her and forcefully brought his lips on hers holding her tightly against him.

"Asshole! Stay the fuck away from me." She growled and slapped him.

She ran from the building and back to the house instead of TM. She needed to think before she saw Jax.

Her mind was racing again…should she tell him…should she keep it to herself. She didn't know what to do. On one hand, she knew she should tell him. On the other, she was already worried about someone finding out about Alec, she didn't need to add another body to the list and if she tells him another body is almost guaranteed. Maybe she could reason with him, make him promise not to go homicidal. She rolled her eyes. It's Jax Teller, he will go ballistic regardless. There's no reasoning with him when it comes to someone messing with his family…especially his old lady. She's the one person she knew he would kill for.

Tara decided to go to the clubhouse before anyone got worried and came looking for her. When she arrived the atmosphere felt off-wrong somehow. Everyone was staring at her and she suddenly felt subconscious wanting to run into the bathroom to make sure she didn't have toilet paper hanging off of her jeans or something.

"What's going on?" She finally asked looking around the crowd of people.

No one said a word. They all just looked at her. She noticed Jax's bike wasn't on the lot. Something was wrong. He's supposed to be working. Instant worry flooded through her.

"Where's Jax?" She asked when she made her way to Gemma.

Gemma just stared at her without a word, picked up her phone and called someone. "She's here." She hung the phone up without another word.

"Gem, what's wrong? What's going on? Where's Jax?" She fired the questions rapidly without a breath.

"You need to wait outside. Jax will be here soon." Gemma turned her back to her.

She squinted her eyes in confusion, but did as she was told. No one was going to answer her, that was clear. She knew Opie or Piney would if they were here…at least she thought they would…she never imagined Gemma would act like this either though.

It didn't take long before Jax rode onto the lot with Opie riding close behind.

The coldness in Jax's expression when his eyes landed on hers took her breath away.

"What's wrong?" She questioned.

"Where have you been?" He asked.

"I went home to rest a few minutes…why?"

"You were supposed to come here. You could have rested here. So where were you?" He asked in disbelief.

"I told you I went home. It's always loud here so I went there. What's this about?"

"Who were you with?"

"No one?" She stated, it sounded more as a question.

"Don't lie to me Tara." He growled.

"Easy Bro." Opie stepped forward. He had vowed to let him get to the bottom of the situation but he wasn't going to do it like this.

Tara's eyes darted between the two men, Opie stood ready in a protective manor. Jax's nostrils flared with anger, his expression full of rage.

"I'm not," Tara choked out, "I was there alone."

"If you're going to cheat on me…maybe you shouldn't make it so public. I can't believe I fell for all this bullshit." Jax sneered.

Her mouth fell open, "cheat on you? What the hell…"

"Don't try to lie and say you didn't, I saw the video and believe me when I find that fucker…he's a dead man. You…"

She was stunned. Video. It all clicked into place. "Are you talking about Dean?"

"At least you have the decency to own up to it. You…"

"Shut up and listen," she raised her voice interrupting him, "if you are referring to Dean assaulting me earlier today as me cheating on you, then you need to take another look at whatever video you saw…or you need to see the whole thing because obviously it was cut off right before I slapped him and told him to stay away from me. Apparently, they edited out the part where I told him that I loved YOU." She was furious, not at him necessarily, but this situation had her skin on fire. She wanted to punch something or someone preferably whatever bitch is starting shit now.

He stood silent staring at her pondering her words.

"He assaulted you?" Opie growled.

"He pulled me into him and kissed me after I told him that I loved Jax. I slapped him and left." Tara sighed.

"I guess he really is a dead man." Opie narrowed his eyes.

"No," Tara placed her hand on his chest, "please don't do anything."

"I won't just let this go, Tara." Jax spoke this time. His expression softer when he looked at her. She could tell he was furious but it wasn't aimed at her now.

"This..." she dropped her head, "this is the reason I went home instead of coming here and debated on if I should tell you about him or not."

"What do you mean? Why the hell wouldn't you tell me?" He asked annoyance in his tone.

"Because of this right here…" she motioned between him and Opie, "you both ready to run off and do God knows what to him because of this. I'm just now getting back to normal after…well…you know…" she couldn't bring herself to mention Alec's name especially after her dream. "If you do this it will only make things worse. I'll be back at square one so please just let it go. Please." She pleaded with the love of her life and her brother to spare Dean's life.

"It won't be like last time." Jax stated, "he will walk away…just with a limp or two." He gave her his famous smirk to lighten the mood.

"No." She shook her head, "if you start…you won't stop. I know you."

He nodded. She was probably right. He couldn't make her any promises. He wouldn't go look for him but if he runs into him randomly, the odds were pretty good that someone would be leaving in a lot worse shape than they arrived.

"I'm sorry," he reached for her hand, "I should have talked to you first before I…reacted."

"Yes, you should have." She stared him in his eyes, "I won't betray you like that…ever. I love you too much to do something stupid to lose you and this family."

"I know. It was just there and caught me off guard… I'm sorry." He stated again.

"It's okay. I would have probably reacted the same way if I saw a video of you kissing someone else…which brings me to…who showed it to you?"

"Wendy." He answered.

"And that wasn't your first clue that it probably wasn't what it seemed?" Tara rolled her eyes. Her and that slut would definitely be having a conversation.

"It should have been." He agreed.

"It's kind of disappointing that no one here gave me a chance to explain before judging me. They all looked at me like I didn't belong anymore…even Gemma." The sadness overtook her. She knew things were good now that the truth was out but it was a slap in the face the way they treated her.

"Mom loves you." Jax lifted her chin up.

"I know…or I thought I did."

"I do." Gemma stated standing behind her. "I do love you. I'm sorry. I was hurt too. You are like my daughter so I thought this was more than just betraying Jax…it felt like a betrayal to me too. If you and Jax don't work out as a couple that's one thing but I couldn't get behind you hurting him like that no matter how much I love you…just like I couldn't get behind him doing it to you had the situation been reversed."

"I understand. I just wish you all would have given me the chance to defend myself before pretty much casting me out."

"Baby, no one casted you out. We just needed time to deal." Gemma hugged her apologetically.

Tara nodded. "Well… you never have to worry about me betraying Jax or you or this family. I love you all so much and I would never do anything to lose him or any of you. I hope you all know that now. Every one of you mean the world to me."

"We love you too baby." Jax kissed her forehead. "Marry me." He whispered in her ear.

"What?" She squealed.

"You heard me…marry me." Jax stated again, louder this time, bringing the attention back on the two of them.

You could have heard a pin drop around the lot as everyone stood half in shock that the Prince of Charming had just proposed to someone and wasn't completely wasted and the other half waiting anxiously for her to answer.

 **Author's Note: Thank you all for your patience! I hope you enjoyed the chapter. Please review!**


	14. Chapter 14

Tara stared at him, mouth gaped open wide, in shock. She was frozen in place.

"Well?" He urged after a few moments.

She wanted to jump into his arms and marry him right then and there but something was holding her back. She didn't know what exactly, maybe the way she had just been treated by practically everyone she loved.

"I…I…I don't know." She stammered. She could see the disappointment and hurt in his eyes. "I want to. I just need some time."

"Time." Jax muttered in disbelief. He never actually thought she would turn him down…or think of turning him down.

"Yes time." She nodded.

Jax tried keeping all of his emotions in check, he didn't want to say something he'd regret later. "Okay. If you want time, you can have all you want." He stepped forward, kissing her forehead and walked quickly to his bike. He had to ride for a bit and clear his head.

She stared after him, "Babe?"

He kept walking without turning around. She watched him until he was out of sight. She clenched her eyes shut. He was pissed. He was hurt. She hadn't meant to do either one.

"Come on little girl, let's have a chat." Piney emerged from the clubhouse.

"I'm not really in the mood right now." Tara answered, still staring in the direction Jax took off in.

"Come on sis." Opie wrapped his arm around her shoulders pulling her to a more private spot where the three of them could talk.

"You got me here…now what?" Tara crossed her arms.

"First things first, you can let go of that bitchy attitude and just listen." Piney hissed. He was still amazed by how much she acted like her mother even though she was too young to remember her. Gracie did the exact same thing anytime she was upset and that was one move he couldn't stand her doing. Crossing her arms and shutting the world out.

"Now tell me…us…what's on your mind?" Opie answered.

"Where do I start? After everything that happened this afternoon, I show up here and get treated like I don't belong by practically everyone I thought cared about me. I mean I guess it fits because in all honesty, I don't belong."

"You stop that," Piney interrupted her, "you will always belong here. You are my baby girl; you will ALWAYS belong here."

"Really? Where were you just a few minutes ago? My _brother_ was standing right there and didn't say a word." She spun around and faced Opie, "to be honest, your expression wasn't much different than theirs."

Opie dropped his head, he had been so focused on letting Jax find out what he needed to, he didn't even think about how it would appear to her. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean for it to look as though I thought you didn't belong. I promised Jax I would let him get to the truth without interfering. I'm sorry."

"Yeah, it's all about Jax's feelings. So much for ' _I haven't been there the last 18 years but I will always have your back now.'_ Thanks bro, it was a real bang up job you did back there having my back and all." Tara scowled, she felt so much anger, and she couldn't contain it anymore. In all fairness, these were the last two people she should be releasing that anger on but she couldn't help herself.

"It's not," Opie threw his hands up in frustration, "it's not all about Jax's feelings. I should have made him handle it differently…not so public…but it just happened so quickly. I can't tell you enough how sorry I am for not being a better brother to you. You know you can count on me."

"Can I?" Tara hissed, "the next time Jax and I have a disagreement, can I really count on you…either of you…to take my side? I understand you guys have history, you're like brothers, he's like a son to you so let's not do this, like I said…I am the outsider. I may be blood, but in this life the club is thicker than blood. History trumps DNA."

"It's not like that at all." Piney objected.

"It's exactly like that." Tara disagreed.

"The old man wasn't even there, what are you going off on him for?" Opie sighed, frustration getting the best of him.

"That's kind of the point isn't it? He wasn't there. He chose to give me away. He chose the club over me."

"No, I wanted a better life for you." Piney answered.

"My mother wanted me to have choices outside of the club. You wanted me to have a life outside of the club but instead of leaving the club and keeping me yourself, you chose to give me away and keep the club. I don't blame you or the club. I've come to love all of you so much in my time here but that doesn't change the facts or anything else that I've said. Now if you'll excuse me. I can't do this round and round about who is right and who is wrong. You see it your way, that you were doing what was best for me. I see it mine, you chose something else besides me. I wasn't a boy like Opie, so I had no value to you…or the club…besides what I could offer as an old lady." She exited the room before the two of them could respond.

"You know we don't see you as an outsider. You're family." Gemma stated. She had been eaves dropping on the conversation.

"Do you know where Jax went?" Tara asked ignoring her words. She didn't want to have this argument with Gemma too.

"I don't," Gemma replied, "his pride was hurt when you didn't accept right away." She explained.

"So anytime I don't do what he wants he's just going to run off? Some marriage that will be." Tara rolled her eyes.

"He loves you baby."

"I don't doubt that." Tara leaned against the wall, "I love him too."

"Then why didn't you say yes?" Luanne asked.

Tara wanted to pull her hair out. There was absolutely no privacy in this place.

"I was hurt and needed time to work through this shit. Everyone here made me feel horrible. It probably wouldn't have bothered me so much but it was him and you, the people I've grown the closest too since I got here that made me feel the worst. A proposal doesn't change that. I want to marry him, I do. I said that. I love him more than I've ever loved anyone. I'm going to head home. If you see him tell him to please call me or come home."

"I love you sweetheart. I will try to get ahold of him." Gemma stated.

"Love you." Tara answered in passing.

It had been hours and she still hadn't heard from Jax. She laid in bed for hours trying not to picture what he was up to.

She heard the door open and rolled over in bed. He stood by the door watching her.

"Where have you been?" She asked.

"Just riding. Stopped by the park. Was just out thinking." He moved to the bed and sat down.

"You are unbelievable." She shook her head in disbelief. "You propose to me and then run off for hours. If we're married, you can't run off every time we have a fucking argument. That's not how marriage works. You have to stay…communicate…deal with this shit not bury it and hope it goes away. You can't jump into whatever pussy suits you at the moment, to drown out your sorrows."

"Whoa." His head snapped up, "I did NOT jump into any pussy or anything else. I was alone sorting through my shit…until Opie found me and talked some sense into me."

"I didn't say you did do anything. I said you can't…meaning for future reference." She replied.

"I know and I've told you before that I don't want anyone but you so you don't have anything to worry about."

"If you want me so much then maybe you should stop making me feel like shit because I don't want or need a relationship where I get accused of doing shit based on the word of some jealous bitch or have to sit up for hours or days wondering where you are or who you are with, if you're alive or not, because your ego gets bruised and you refuse to talk to me about it. I will not do it anymore so if you want this marriage to work, you better figure out how to communicate with me and you better figure it out fast."

"You're right. I'm sorry." He placed his hand on her knee.

"Save the apologies. Let's just fix the problems we have so when we do get married, we're not dealing with the same shit repeatedly."

He nodded, "Deal. So does that mean you do want to marry me?" He grinned.

Her heart warmed some, "if you would have just listened earlier dumbass I told you I wanted to marry you…I just needed time. I never said we couldn't be engaged during that time, I just said I need time…"

"I can do that." His mega-watt smile was turned on in full force. He picked her up off the bed spinning her around and kissing her passionately. "I love you so much babe."

"I love you too." She winked.


	15. Chapter 15

Jax's excitement spilled over the minute they returned to TM hand in hand. "Everyone," he whistled to gain their attention, "I just wanted you all to know that this beautiful girl right here," he kissed her knuckles lightly, "has agreed to be my wife."

The cheers around TM could have been heard from a mile away. Everyone was thrilled for the happy couple. Opie clapped Jax on the back, "I guess you're officially going to be my brother." His smile was as big as Jax's. It was easy for him to be okay with this now that he knew exactly how much Jax cared for her and what all he was willing to turn down for her. He'd turned down many opportunities to hook up with some hot chics, so he wasn't worried in the least about his fidelity to his sister.

Gemma squealed with delight, hugging and kissing the both of them. "This is going to be the best wedding SAMCRO has ever seen." Tara groaned. She knew being a member's old lady-more specifically the Prince's old lady would entail a huge wedding. Every member in the United States charters would be coming in for the big event. No one would want to miss the chance to see Jackson Teller settle down.

Piney watched in the corner, he was the only one who wasn't thrilled with the news. He was happy for them but he worried. He wanted more for her-it was the whole reason he gave her up-Grace and he both wanted her to have a life outside of the club. He had to admit, the pairing guaranteed she'd stay close to him. As much as he wanted more for her, he couldn't bear to lose her now. "You better treat her right, shithead, or you'll deal with me." He pulled Jax in for a hug and whispered in his ear. "You got it old man. I won't mess this up for the world." Jax whispered back. "You sure about this sweetheart. This life can be rough especially on the old ladies at times." Piney questioned his daughter. She smiled at him, "I know I love him. I'm sure of that. I know you'll always be here for me if it ever gets too hard though." She leaned in to hug him, deciding to finally give him a break.

"Are you crying old man?" Opie joked with his dad.

"Are you stupid? I don't cry. I just got something in my eye." Piney huffed, stepping back from Tara's embrace and wiped his eyes, hurrying to the back.

"I'm happy for you sis." Opie leaned in and hugged Tara. "Thanks." She grinned at him.

"We have lots to do. Lots to plan." Donna gushed, bouncing up and down with her arms around Tara's neck. "This is so exciting."

"Easy before you break my neck." Tara untangled herself from Donna laughing. "We have plenty of time."

Tara made her way back into Jax's arms, there was no place else in the world she'd rather be.

…..CharmingTheBrokenKingdom…..

 **One Year Later**

Gemma, Tara, and Donna had spent the last few months planning every detail of the wedding.

Jax had been the perfect husband-to-be. He managed to avoid the long runs, he did a few overnighters but Clay didn't assign him any of the week long trips.

Things had been perfect. Even Alec's father had come up completely empty on his investigation. Tara didn't know what the boys did with the body but he couldn't find one scrap of evidence linking them to his disappearance. **Wedding Day**

"Get out of here, Jax." Donna shoved against the door, "you're not supposed to see her before the wedding."

"Come on," Jax groaned impatiently, "when has SAMCRO ever followed that traditional shit?" It had been 24 hours since he laid eyes on his girl and it had him going crazy.

"Since now, get out." Gemma snapped her fingers and shewed him away suppressing a smile.

"Come on, just let me see him one time." Tara rushed toward the door but Gemma cut her off.

"Young lady, we've talked about this. Sit your ass down. You've only got a little bit longer and you'll see him." Gemma chuckled. Tara was being just as whiney and impatient as Jax. Neither of them could stand being apart for more than a few minutes and as unhealthy as it was, Gemma couldn't think of any other way they should be. She hoped they stayed like this forever.

Tara slumped down into the chair, rubbing her humungous belly, laughing to herself.

"What's so funny?" Donna squinted her eyes. This girls' mood swings were giving her whip lash. Just two seconds ago she was fuming about wanting to see Jax and now she's laughing. Crazy girl.

"I was just thinking about you actually." Tara answered, laughing harder.

"What about me?" Donna looked over herself self-consciously.

"I was thinking about the day I told you I was pregnant." Tara responded, snorting. "You cried like a baby because you had just finished making my wedding dress."

"Yeah you were an asshole and couldn't wait to get pregnant until AFTER the wedding." Donna laughed along with them. Gemma joined in.

"I know. I'm such a bitch." Tara threw her head back laughing freely.

Gemma grabbed the camera and snapped a few pictures. These were the moments they would want to remember forever-how happy she was on her wedding day.

"You are," Donna agreed, "but I love you and my nephew so much…so it's all good. You know we could have done this whole wedding thing after the baby is born if some people wouldn't be in such a damn hurry." She grinned.

"Well," Tara panted to catch her breath, "I'm glad we have your approval and support." She winked.

"It's time." Opie knocked on the door.

Tara jumped up ready to go. Just a few more minutes and Jax would forever be hers.

"Tara Grace Knowles, I promise to love you for the rest of my life. I will be here for you through the good times and the bad, the ups and the downs, through thick and thin. I promise to always communicate with you. I promise to always be the one person you and our baby can count on." He held her hand in one and rubbed her protruding belly with the other.

Tara's eyes filled with tears, "Jackson Nathaniel Teller, I've never met anyone like you. You have the ability to make the bad just disappear. You make me feel safe when all hell is breaking loose and I should be afraid, I'm not. I know that no matter what you will be there to protect me. I love you more than life itself. I will stand by you, supporting you one hundred percent no matter what this crazy life throws at us."

"I now pronounce you Husband and Wife. You may kiss your bride."

The audience went wild. Jax pulled Tara in for a kiss. "I love you, Mrs. Teller." He kissed the tip of her nose.

"I love you more, husband." She smiled pulling his mouth back down to hers.

The MC members hugged the both of them. "What was all the commotion?" Jax asked Clay once they got to the reception.

"What commotion?" Tara asked.

"Dean showed up. Happy and some of the Prospects escorted him off of the property." Clay answered. "We took care of it."

"How did I miss that?" Tara muttered out loud.

"It happened before you came out of the room." Jax whispered kissing her temple.

"Oh." Tara nodded.

"Happy made it perfectly clear that you're off the market now and he better stay away or another smiley face will be tatted on his arm." Tig stated.

Tara was stunned by how comfortable she was with that statement. Either this life had hardened her or she'd just had enough of his shit over the past year. Random phone calls from unknown numbers, texts, flowers. Hopefully now he understands. Happy's not someone you want to cross so Tara assumed it would be the last time she ever heard from Dean.

….CharmingTheBrokenKingdom…

"Let's get some of this yogurt." Tara reached up on the high shelf at the market before Jax could grab what she wanted.

SPLAAAAAAAAAAAAASH.

"Babe? Did you just piss yourself?" Jax asked staring down at the puddle at her feet.

"No. My water broke." She answered. She had been having contractions all day so she knew she was getting close but didn't expect it to go this fast.

"What?" He was still staring down at the puddle.

"Jax," she snapped, "it means it's almost time for the baby. The contractions are getting closer together." She panted gripping the shopping cart handle tighter as another big one rocked her body. She felt pain from her pelvic region all the way around to her lower back and ass.

"Okay. Hospital." He rushed out the door leaving her waddling back behind him. "Shit. I'm sorry." He came back in taking her hand.

"It's okay." She rolled her eyes as he helped her into the car. She was grateful she didn't let him talk her into getting on the back of his Dyna.

…. **Babytime…..**

"It's a boy." Dr. Everett beamed pulling out their son and holding him up so Jax could cut the cord.

They laid him on Tara's chest briefly, "my precious little Abel." Tears streamed down Tara's cheeks as she looked at her newborn. His hair was so white, it looked like cotton. His little cry sounded like a goat but it melted Tara's heart. He already had her wrapped around his little finger.

"We're going to take him to make sure everything looks okay with him. We will bring him back in as soon as we're done."

"Okay." Tara reluctantly handed him back over. She knew they needed to make sure he still had no signs of the flaw. They monitored her closely during her pregnancy for it to be on the safe side but everything pointed to a healthy baby boy.

"You did so good baby." Jax kissed her and rubbed her hair back out of the way. "I'm so proud of you. He's so beautiful."

"He's going to look like his daddy." Tara smiled. "I can already see that."

"Well hopefully he's got your smarts then." Jax chuckled.

"Are you going to let everyone know he's here?" Tara wondered out loud. He hadn't left her side.

"Yeah. I just want to make sure everything's okay first." He murmured.

"Everything looks great. He's a healthy 7 pound 12 oz baby boy. He's 20 and ¼ inches long." The pediatrician stated pushing Abel back into the room.

"Thank God." Tara finally relaxed. She knew they said everything looked good throughout her pregnancy but she was beginning to worry since it had took so long for them to bring him back.

"I'm going to go out and let everyone know. You know they're going to want to get back here and see him soon." He chuckled.

Tara nodded, Gemma would be busting down those doors to see her grandbaby. Piney, Opie, and Donna would be right behind her.

Tara never dreamed her life would feel so complete. She had an amazing husband, a beautiful healthy baby boy, and more family than she could have ever hoped for not too long ago. In this moment holding her baby, staring into husband's eyes, and listening to her extended family gush about how happy they are for her little family was everything she'd ever need. Her life truly felt like a fairytale now.

 _ **Author's Note: That's the end of this story. I had originally planned to take it further but I hit a block and couldn't figure out which direction to take it. I hope you all enjoyed it. Please review and check out my other stories if you haven't done so already. Thank you all for taking the time to read and review!**_


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